As a husband and father of 3, I think this has more to do with having to share you with your mothering needs. My son-in-law has some of the same 'before kids' ideas.

Hopefully, the counseling will help. The key skills for him to learn is to take some of your duties or load so you can have an evening where everything in the house is done except for baby. Women struggle to connect with and spend connected time with their husbands when they have unfinished tasks to do. He wants you thinking about him but you are thinking, Does the baby need a diaper change? Is the laundry done ? The kitchen is a mess. and about many other household responsibilities.

If this is a distraction to you so you can not devote time to him, mention it to your counselor (hopefully in private before a session) so your counselor can bring it up to him as if it is the counselor's idea. He will receive it better from the counselor than from you.

Fatigue from the day can also get in the way of connecting. This same help with household tasks can help with fatigue. Watch your mail for a ValPak or other marriage mail ( an envelope with many fliers from different companies) for a discount coupon for housecleaning. A single thorough housecleaning can be just the ticket to help you let go for a while to pay attention to him.

Hope this helps.

My best to you.