I'm sorry to hear of your troubles DFayesMom!

You're definitely not alone with marital issues following injury and to have young one(s) that's hard on any relationship, for sure.

My husband and I had issues before my injury, but we were doing ok. We'd been to counseling, worked out many things. He brought a lot of crap with him to the marriage, but it was ok, because I was strong enough for both of us, I carried us through the rough times.

Enter my injury... I'm no longer strong enough to hardly carry myself through the day never mind deal with his crap and obviously the problems are larger than life again. Probably if I wasn't so tired and could find the energy and ability to make plans, I'd just leave. But I can't, so we struggle.

The counselor's words haunt me... Love gets you through the easy times, commitment gets you through the rough times... that remains to be seen.

My husband is so wrapped up in his stupid, made up day to day work problems that are just so important to him, but to me, really do seem stupid in comparison to me dealing with a brain injury, my mother dying and my adult daughter moving out on her own, that some days its all I can do not to want to slap him.

While I understand he's a VP of a large company with hundreds of employees he's responsible for, to me, those problems are just solvable and can be dealt with.

I get that each person's problems are the biggest most important problems in the world... to THAT person... but still... I'm frustrated at his lack of support and understanding... its lead to lots of resentment.

But we trudge ahead... in hopes something will shift, change and grow... or I'll find the energy and ability to move on alone.

But you're definitely not alone.

If he doesn't have time to go to couple's therapy for 2 weeks, that's ok... you can make an appointment and get started without him. Often times the couples therapist likes to meet with each of you separately to begin with anyhow. So go, make the appointment... you'll at least feel like you're making progress and in the mean time, you'll get some support. You don't have to hold the weight of the world alone.

Starr