((((((Bee)))))),

BREATHE!! You know something, we can take our history and we can paint it onto someone else with very little provocation.

My brother killed himself. My husband tried to kill me. My son's in jail. And I don't have a thing to do with men ... except now my heart is thawing just a bit

'Neighbor' is a nice guy that you're attracted to and that you'd like to get to know better. You don't know if they were having a private conversation that they didn't want you to overhear. 'Neighbor' is undergoing chemo so his 'manners' probably aren't what they normally would be.

I've give it another chance. Lose the anger -- this man is NOT your husband. Give him another chance. But, don't put your whole heart out there. Try for 'supportive' and 'playful' and 'happy'. Aim for friendship first this time (instead of love). If it's meant to be, it will come.

Honey, don't throw all your anger at him 'cause one second with him reminded you of someone else in your life. Give him another chance.

I told you -- I have a nice feeling about this guy. He brings out some real positive sides of your personality. Try for now just being a supportive and neighborly friend while he's going through the chemo. You'll grow to know him better and see him in all sorts of situations and be able to better judge what kind of man he really is.

Even if it turns out that he isn't "the one", you can still have a friendship with him. How about considering him sort of an off-Broadway stage to practice your new skills with. What you learn and practice with him can be used later if he turns out to be just a friend and not a future husband.

Take a deep breath and remember what it was about him that attracted you to him. That's still there. Don't throw everything away for one angry instant.

One thing that you could have done was said something like "Oh, I didn't realize you had company. I was just stopping by to see how you were doing and to see if you needed anything." That would have pulled the attention to you and would have given him a chance to tell you that he'd call later when he wasn't busy.

BIG HUGS (and love).

Barb