Bram,

I remember feeling like I would never survive life with all this pain and feeling like not a sole understood me. But then it happened, I got some relief. It was not a cure just a some relief with my patchs and my lsb's.

Please hang in there. I know it is hard, but you never know if your relief is around that corner.
(sorry didn't read your whole post, now days I can't read long threads, every thing gets blurry.) But I want to give you a hug.