hi,
I was married to an airman years ago, and he never was deployed, but he did go tdy a lot. I wasn't sick back then (in the late 80's) but I was young.
One thing I discovered was that many of the wives would get together, and there were several support groups right there on base for just this sort of thing (ok, maybe not specifically including your pain issues, but you may be surprised).
If you are feeling alone, overwhelemed, and depressed, you can be sure that some of your sisters are too.

Um one question, are you seeing base docs, or are you going civillian. You may be eligible to see an off base specialist because you yourself are not actually active duty (even though your HUBBY is deployed! that is soooo wrong, but it can be used to your advantage if you research your options.
Good luck sweetie,