Thank you, all of you how supportive and compassionate you are.
Texan ill find your article and read it. I promise!
Ginnie- congrats on quitting cold turkey like that after that long. Wow!!I'm sorry about your dad. I only smoke about 10 a day. Were trying again next week with the hypnosis to tackle it from an anxiety standpoint.
The weather here in Ottawa is beautiful today,( sunny and 25 degrees), and some positive things have happened! It just goes to show that things can get better. More money seems to be coming in from different sources and that is a huge relief. I'm working with someone from disability employment supports and have a kick *** resume now . I'm training in the family business and I seem to be getting somewhere in that regard. Hooray!
Now, my moods swing violently, but therapy is helping me soften them a little. Little by little, I'm learning how to deal with life more rationally, I still have some addictions , ocd thinking patterns,pain flares ,and deep depressive states..but at least I'm not staying in bed crying.
I am persisting and fighting.. today-anyway. Tomorrow I have a therapy session and a job, so that will get me out of bed. I find keeping busy very helpful.

I have called the crisis line once myself. I also have always found genuine support on here.

Update soon