I am so happy to hear you saying that you had such a introspective epiohony like that beffudled2, that is just awesome! I am glad you're able to pin point what you (and who) you were upset with, sometimes that is not so easy to do. I agree with Barb, that this is a good thing, having Doug in your life and that you can learn a lot from your friendship with him, like how to FEEL again.