MVA crash 6 months ago. Slept the 100 day sleep. Exhausted, in my head, not my body. Constant nausea , headaches, light and noise sensitivity, confusion, withdrawn from myself, PTSD, severe concussion from my head going in all directions in double impact, can't read, can't watch tv, listen to music or books on tape, public places are complete chaos for my brain, sharp shooting pains through left side of head and right eye. Insomnia, can't organize, bad memory, mental math issues, severe distraction issues, dizziness, balance problems, I'm a savory eater but only craved sugar the first 100 days after that back to savory...when I can eat, ringing in ears, heavy head, pain at base of head and neck, muscle twitches 24/7, temple pain, I can't drive yet, focus and processing problems, blurry vision, migraines, depression.

I have seen: neurosurgeon, neuropsychologist, psychologist, psychiatrist, professor of otolaryngology & physical therapy human movement sciences, otoneurologist, neuro rehab & dizziness n balance, eye dr, Neuro eye dr soon

Diagnosis':
Post traumatic migraines with photophobia, phonophobia, possible L occipital neuralgia, hyperacusis, PTSD, Post concussive syndrome due to acceleration/deaccel. such as in "shaken baby" syndrome. Hearing loss- worse on left side, overall vestibular function is moderately reduced. Down beating nystagmus on cervical testing, right beating nystagmus on head left position. VEMP testing is weaker on L side.

The first 5 days I seems beat up, but not brain damaged. After that my brain went into shut down. I am much more aware of life now than before but it is slipping away from me in other ways like I'm being victimized again. My job has been given to someone else, we have to switch to my husbands insurance.

I'm struggling with basic daily life. I'm isolated. The outside world is painful for me. I keep friends away because I don't want them to see me like this... Who am I now? I'm not the wife and mother I used to be, I can't work, drive, others make decisions for me. I feel like my life is slipping from me.

I am finally aware enough to be sad. I kept thinking I was getting ready to go back to work, when everyone around me knew it would be a long time if I ever go back.

My neuropsychologist and OT feel I have brain damage on the left side and that it's more of a mtbi instead of a severe concussion. I have 11 1/2 months left on the most crucial healing time and this is like navigating an alien language.

This is such a lonely injury. I'm in my 40s, female, mom, wife, on long term disability, love nature, photos, and I'm not sure what else right now. Neuropsychologist wants me to get a hobby that doesn't highlight my disabilities.

Right now I could just use some friends that get me. Jace