Hi sweetie.

I don't know if it helps to know this or not, but here goes:

I've messed up bunches and bunches too.
I've made other people miserable.
I've been a high-maintenance friend, girlfriend, daughter, student, employee and whathaveyou.
I've disappointed people over and over.
I could go on and on.

I still do those things. (except the employee and student because I am unemployed and not in school. )

Try not to ask too much of yourself.

I am sorry you feel desperate. I understand the feeling. Try to find a tiny, ever so tiny bit of hope in there. Here's one way you can suggest to yourself: the future isn't written. It's possible things could change even if they haven't yet. As long as you aren't dead, there is hope to be had.

So, all you have to do right now, is LIVE. Try to feel well. Be kind to yourself. Nurture yourself. The rest will come. Rome wasn't built in a day.

love

waves