KD Having come here from a mental health site you would find it hard to understand what exactly Braintalk was in the lives of many there.

Of course there was a lot of general chit chat but at the core there was a life and death situation.

After I had been there for a short period there was a woman who was being a real irritant to some of the members and no matter what you did she just couldn't get it together enough to understand. So John had to ban her and while he had no choice he was clearly upset by it and so was i. I knew where she was posting and I felt she could not take the banning and was really concerned for here. Two days later I found her on a site and talked to her for awhile. She was so disoriented and wouldn't contact anyone and when she said she was going to sleep I waited for an hour or so to see if she came back. That day her husband came on to say she had passed away in her own bed alone during the night. He blamed the site for causing her anguish and you know I had to agree.

We all had long posts about it and many had problems with what they had said to her in the paast and felt to blame but there was no blame to give out. It was beyond any of our most sincere offers to help her. Her face is forever in my mind. Small, serious with long beautiful hair. Many here can remember her I am sure.

When you are a moderator it is a very serious project and that is why i am forever saying I don't want moderators. If she had of been allowed to talk and say what she wanted to there would have been someone to share with her. Being told she could no longer talk cut her off from help and support. true she may have never found anyone but at least there was a chance she may have.

You know right now I can't even remember her name but her face is as clear in my mind as my own.

Tidilly little comments that in everyday llife would be as nothilng are illminated on this site as well as Braintalk and should be ignored unless you can help and assist. All the small talk of sorry for you and praying for you don't really cut it. All it indicates is what you feel and not what the person onthe other side is feeling.

I like positive, and I don't mean saccarine santimonious remarks but straight from the hip truthfull reponses as there would be in a "real"conversation. That takes time to get to know the person first and then tak truth.

Having so many moderators around is confusing I would imagine to many of the newbies and especially when three or more of them respond to one post.

It must be overwhelming to some, maybe not all.

The name just came to me "Cat" was what she used to call herself. I think?

So this site here is a continuation of Braintalk and what it was. All of those who are now advocating for Als and Parkinsons started it at Braintalk save for one or two. A few associations came from there as well.

So what I say about the site and whatever happened to John Lester and his desire for it which I fear came under anothers influence is not in any way related to the members there. We had our bitchy days and our good days and we did make a difference for ourselves. John provided the site but it was the members that made it what it was, not him in any way he now takes credit for.

It was the members that made John Lester and it was the members he betayed.

It's a precarious road you walk and what today is or yesterday was it is every day a learning experience. Just wait for tomorrow.