By Al Estock

Choice, as it relates to suicide, remains a somewhat controversial subject. Many people insist that those who die by suicide make a final "choice" to die. Respectfully, I disagree. The word choice makes it much to neat and simple - as though suicide was as easy as selecting a pair of shoes or a tie.
Suicide is so much more complex.

Truth is - the only person who makes a true "choice" to die by suicide is a person with a fully functional, rational mind - free of mental challenge/distress-and capable of making the choice to die from a variety of options they clearly understand, with all consequences equally apparent.

Sadly, the vast majority of suicides result from underlying, untreated, mistreated, or unsuccessfully treated mental challenges - often including
major depression. The stigma/silence that surrounds any constructive discussion about mental challenge provides the first strike toward suicide. Few want to admit to having mental issues. Even fewer care to discuss them. The second strike is born by shame, humiliation, and/or hopelessness felt by the person with thoughts of suicide - and the desperate need they often feel to keep such feelings and thoughts secret. The third and final strike occurs when the person is unable to see any path but suicide to relieve their mental torment.

Suicide is not about choice - it is about lack of choice. One cannot make a choice if one is unable to comprehend that a spectrum of other choices exists. It is not the case that those that die from irrational suicide make a bad choice, the wrong choice - a tragic, final "choice" - they simply follow the only path they are able to understand that will end the mental pain they feel. Of course, we, as survivors, see the multitude of rational choices that could have been made.

Bottom line - most suicides do not result from a "choice" - they most often result from an illness process that robs the deceased of the ability to make a rational choice, The deceased did not ask for the illness, nor did they understand or choose the consequences. Our society does not blame people who die from cancer, heart disease, kidney disease, liver failure, or stroke for "choosing" their deaths. It is long overdue that the burden of blame, shame and "choice" is lifted from those that die by suicide. Most did not want to die; they simply needed to escape from pain. Their illness prevented any glimmer of a choice.

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This excellent article was the SOS newsletter that arrived today. It originated in Obelisk Oct. 2012 catholiccharities.net/loss