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Old 08-22-2017, 04:51 PM #991
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Originally Posted by SecondChances View Post
I would NEVER have gone to that store right next to the liquor store if I had not felt strong and in a good frame of mind. OMG.... that was so difficult! I had a mini anxiety attack when I got home and am still reeling. I have clonepin here and if I can't settle down I will need take one. That urge was so powerful and came outta no where. It was frightening!
It is so confusing that in addiction we crave the very thing that makes us so ill and unhappy. Deep breathes and this posting has been helpful. I will skip the clonie but will need to be more mindful in where I go shopping. Lesson learned.

As I previously smoked 2 1/2 packs of cigarettes a day (haven't had one in several years); but out of no where comes this urge. But I/we know we can't even have one or it's all over and would rather not have to start again at day 1.....

Gerry
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Old 08-22-2017, 07:58 PM #992
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I haven't visited for awhile so I had a lot to get caught up on! It is true this is a great site to come to for support. No one judges. We've all had our own demons and we are all human. I just wish I was more of a positive person so I could provide more uplifting words here - I was born to a father who basically all my life, told me I wouldn't be worth a crap, and my mother never really corrected him (I imagine she was too scared to do so) - but those feelings of worthlessness don't ever really go away.

I wanted to throw my 2 cents in about opioids. I've had a few surgeries in my life (not related to my alcohol or any substance abuse). The first one, as an outpatient, I was prescribed Vicodin. I wasn't planning on taking it at all, because of the infamous Brett Favre (American football player) addiction. Well, nighttime after the surgery came, and I was IN PAIN. I took the recommended dose and it did...NOTHING for me. I took another pill...NOTHING. I threw them away and took Ibuprofen. It was a long time ago, but I imagine I probably self-medicated with beer.

My next surgery was fairly major, and it occurred just when opioids were becoming a really scary addictive drug. My surgeon prescribed OxyContin. Again, I was VERY wary about taking it, but they basically made me take a dose before I left the hospital, and sent a month's worth home with me, along with 2 more refill opportunities. Guess what? It did: NOTHING for me. So I didn't take any more.

Strange, I know. Maybe because my mind was so fearful of adapting an addiction? I just thought I'd provide a different perspective. How can alcohol be so gripping and opioids do not a dang thing for me? After the posts I have read here, and the stories I hear day in and day out about the opioid crisis we have in America, I think I'll consider myself VERY fortunate.
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Old 08-22-2017, 08:23 PM #993
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Originally Posted by Wide-O View Post
This is correct and vital: the danger is not so much in taking it (except when mixing with alcohol), but in getting off them without tapering. You really need a couple of weeks, do it very gradually, and pay attention to your body/brain.

Fortunately, valium is nowhere near as dangerous as Xanax, and if it helps you sleep (and nothing else will), and you are not upping the dose constantly, you might even consider staying with it. Talk to a doctor to make sure (I surely am not one!). No reason for panic or worry, just something you need to be aware of.

Thanks Wide-O. Appreciate the reassurance.
Both Primary and PM are aware as well as prescribing the Valium. The scrip reads take, as needed, up to a max of 4 per day.

I have a mild case of Cervical Dystonia. Was given Botox injections (prior to my taking Valium) which did nothing for me so I stopped with the injections. Valium is prescribed not only for anxiety; but Muscle spasms. When I started taking Valium a few years ago, neck/shoulder spasms were greatly reduced. Have not taken more than 2 1/2 a day for the past several years even tho there are enough tablets to take up to 4. Since I accumulate extra tablets, I usually don't refill as often. I do agree should I ever lower or stop, will do so with doctor's approval and guidance.

Gerry.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:22 AM #994
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It's ok if they prescribe them for a very short term, unfortunately a lot of GP's just continue to script issue when the patient runs up every 2 or so weeks. Then suddenly it's in the news and the GP says nope, no more, and they fail to offer anything to help the person titrate down, they frequently will make the patient go cold turkey because they just don't know enough about dependence forming drugs. All they know of is addiction and how they can be penalised or struck off of the registrar for over prescribing, sadly their need to cover their own *** provides little assistance to the patient.

I'm so sorry your friends son turned to Heroin, it's an all too common story. But Heroin where I am is fast becoming a drug of the ages. Meth has taken over everything and is significantly cheaper. My nieces first partner and father to her first child is/was a heroin addict. He has been to rehab many times. I'm lead to believe he is straight at present, but it's a fluid change on any given month. Drug users are not just the poor or middle class, this boy comes from a very well to do, affluent & influential family. Drug addiction doesn't differentiate, it will take anyone sadly.

Im so sorry for your friends loss. It saddens me greatly when I learn of incidents where people have turned to illicit drugs following genuine GP prescription need. I truly believe there needs to be more education and accountability with GP's.

Because of my job I go to many GP surgeries and I see the current answer to this problem in my city in many, many surgeries is signage "we won't prescribe this drug so don't bother asking. Go elsewhere else". I wonder of the patients who truly do need it what they are offered instead. Perhaps Panamax as the ED doctor stated repeatedly when she discharged me on July 7th & then there we were less than 3 weeks later knowing major surgery is instead required and offers the only fix, and then at significant risk. Panamax / equivalent to Tylenol, I wonder why I didn't think to take it before the ambualance was called ...lmao (if only)

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I know a woman who just lost her son to heroin. It all started about 8 years ago when he was prescribed opiods after his car crash. He was only 28.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:34 AM #995
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Gerry you had a very good reason for getting the urge completely out of the blue. But, and it's a big but, you stayed true to yourself and commitment. Well done. Hope things are on the better for hubby
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As I previously smoked 2 1/2 packs of cigarettes a day (haven't had one in several years); but out of no where comes this urge. But I/we know we can't even have one or it's all over and would rather not have to start again at day 1.....

Gerry
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:38 AM #996
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Well done SC, draw on whatever you need to help you on your journey. It's the end result and getting home safely with your dignity intact and sobriety still true that counts. Try and relax and congratulate yourself, acknowledge you passed a moment and stayed the path. It's not easy, it's one thing each and everyone of us on here knows.

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I had to run out for 2 quick errands. Unfortunately one was right next door to a liquor store. Oh wow, I was white knuckled getting to my car and staying outta trouble. I did it but that was quite a challenge. I remembered Icehouse saying "accountability" keeps him sober. I did not want to come here and tell you I failed and in the same breath complain that my legs hurt. You all saved me.
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Old 08-23-2017, 01:41 AM #997
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Parents have a way of unwittingly or sometimes willingly sucking the life from us. You are your own person now, and what you write of on here shows positivity for many. Not everyone will succumb to addiction to opioids. For some reason the opioid crisis in the US seems to have eclipsed and masked the legal alcohol service and problem it too is causing. Thank you for contributing, everything on these NT threads I believe adds value to someone's journey at sometime.


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Originally Posted by WannaGetFeelingBack View Post
I haven't visited for awhile so I had a lot to get caught up on! It is true this is a great site to come to for support. No one judges. We've all had our own demons and we are all human. I just wish I was more of a positive person so I could provide more uplifting words here - I was born to a father who basically all my life, told me I wouldn't be worth a crap, and my mother never really corrected him (I imagine she was too scared to do so) - but those feelings of worthlessness don't ever really go away.

I wanted to throw my 2 cents in about opioids. I've had a few surgeries in my life (not related to my alcohol or any substance abuse). The first one, as an outpatient, I was prescribed Vicodin. I wasn't planning on taking it at all, because of the infamous Brett Favre (American football player) addiction. Well, nighttime after the surgery came, and I was IN PAIN. I took the recommended dose and it did...NOTHING for me. I took another pill...NOTHING. I threw them away and took Ibuprofen. It was a long time ago, but I imagine I probably self-medicated with beer.

My next surgery was fairly major, and it occurred just when opioids were becoming a really scary addictive drug. My surgeon prescribed OxyContin. Again, I was VERY wary about taking it, but they basically made me take a dose before I left the hospital, and sent a month's worth home with me, along with 2 more refill opportunities. Guess what? It did: NOTHING for me. So I didn't take any more.

Strange, I know. Maybe because my mind was so fearful of adapting an addiction? I just thought I'd provide a different perspective. How can alcohol be so gripping and opioids do not a dang thing for me? After the posts I have read here, and the stories I hear day in and day out about the opioid crisis we have in America, I think I'll consider myself VERY fortunate.
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Old 08-23-2017, 05:15 AM #998
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SecondChances, that is a huge achievement.

Well done !

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Originally Posted by SecondChances View Post
I had to run out for 2 quick errands. Unfortunately one was right next door to a liquor store. Oh wow, I was white knuckled getting to my car and staying outta trouble. I did it but that was quite a challenge. I remembered Icehouse saying "accountability" keeps him sober. I did not want to come here and tell you I failed and in the same breath complain that my legs hurt. You all saved me.
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Old 08-23-2017, 09:56 AM #999
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WannaGetFeelingBack
I took the recommended dose and it did...NOTHING for me. I took another pill...NOTHING. I threw them away and took Ibuprofen. It was a long time ago, but I imagine I probably self-medicated with beer.
I resemble this remark. I broke both my hips a few years back and pain meds didn't even touch the pain. I dropped them after day 2 and went for Vodka....that worked.

I am one of the fortunate that does not take ANY medication at all, zero, not even aspirin.

I could care less about drugs (hard or soft) or tobacco...but that alcohol....wowzer.

Fascinating how it affects us all in different ways.
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Old 08-23-2017, 12:22 PM #1000
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After yesterday my confidence is badly shaken. I felt like I had absolutely no will of my own and I came so very close to going into that liquor store. I had much to do outside my home today but I don't dare leave my dwelling. I trust nothing just now and am still freaked out.

Great to hear from all of you,....your struggles and successes. As for me I am just waiting for some improvement in my PN but it started 8 years ago so I can't expect it will quickly improve, if at all.

Just for today.....
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