I always loved my beer, experimented with drugs, still smoke pot... But I'm bipolar and my first tip-off that I was going manic was that I would stop off for a beer and end up coming home after last call...

I was drinking (heavily) on my meds, and the incidents became more frequent. Not good for a marriage. I was drinking at home too, but my husband didn't have a problem with that cuz he's an arm chair alcoholic. We got into a lot of fights over it, and I ended up leaving him.

I had side effects from my bipolar meds, and went off them. Then I went on a real tear for a couple of months, hitting the bars most nights or drinking at home alone. I did some things I'm not proud of, including getting a DUI.
I was living with my father in a bad situation, that didn't help.

I ended up slitting my wrists and OD'ing. I spent 3 days in the hospital, then was forced to voluntarily commit myself for a couple of weeks.

I've reconciled with my husband, but after a month dry I've been having a few beers on occasion.
I don't drive. I have court on Thursday for the DUI and am going to plead guilty. I spoke to the prosecutor and he said he would recommend a shorter suspension and lower fine, but it's up to the judge. I'm nervous.

I know I shouldn't be drinking because I'm an alcoholic, the meds, court... but it's hard...

Kay

I know it's hard, real hard, but it IS possible if your heart is in the right place. I am a firm believer that everyone has their "own personal rock bottom" and it is different for everyone. I hope you find yours soon as sometimes that is the foundation that you can rebuild your life upon.

I got a DUI back in 2011 (sitting in a parked car) and it was a LONG process to gain the privilege of driving again. I lost my license for a year, had a restricted license, paid the heavy fines, did the State classes, had the breathalyzer in my Land Rover and then had to gain the trust of my friends to even get in a car with me.

Sucks.

It will be OK.

God, I hate to think that THIS isn't rock bottom...

My husband thinks I should lose my right to drive forever because of all the d/d I've done in the past. After a lot of silence, anxiety, and anger I told him he needs to let the state punish me first. A year's a long time.

How did it go today kay?
bizi

Thankfully, I got the minimum.

I posted a long reply on the BPD board.

as with everything
"on day at a time"
i understand
in the end only You
can take care of you
with much support for you
i understand
me