Sure, a post is always a static simplification of a dynamic complex situation. I often find myself thinking I didn't explain myself all that well, things have moved on, choice of words didn't translate well, I should have mentioned xyz etc. As long as it's clear we are all just trying to be supportive and honest while thinking out loud it's all good.

Gonna be an interesting garage-night though!

As he feels once again he does not need meetings and the tools that are offered not to mention they too are where he is or was
He does not want me to support him into getting the help I know first hand it's been over two decades now a greatful recovering alcoholic I am
What he wants to hear me say I believe him
All I could say was
Until you throw in the towel and stop trying to do it "your way"
Know I am here when it gets you
He is not speaking to me again
Not a thing I can do about it
Wide-O hits the nail on the head operative word "honesty"
It's the only way
The only way
I am brutally honest
And he doesn't want to hear it
On the sidelines whenever he's had enough before he kills himself
This society I have found has a huge problem with the "truth"
Me

We're still sleeping in the garage, painting nearly finished and then furniture moving again to get it all where and how we want it, plus have the curtains and blinds returned. I hope they come up as good as they say they have. Mind you we have become strangely used to none...

DB witnessed a terrible car accident right in front of him, another car ran the car off the road from the right lane into the gravel (median strip) DB was in the left lane and about 50 mtr behind. The car hit the gravel and spun 3 times across the highway to the left, hit the left side gravel and flipped 3 times. DB was first on scene then others arrived. DB in uniform took control, gave directions and a small younger lad managed to reach in and turn the engine off. Initially they wanted to break the window but DB could see the dog in the car. The man was very shook up and not with it, so they couldn't get him to turn the engine off and there was oil or something dripping from the engine. They then managed to get the window open a bit more, the lad climbed in and handed the dog out. The ambulance arrived, they righted the car up onto its side and the man got out. Very shook up, about 50ish. No one else could take the dog so we had her until 10pm when the mans father arrived from a fair distance away. Poor shook up old poodle, pining and crying dreadfully. I got her some food n drink, took her out for wees & poos twice which she did and then finally I put Bronsons old coat on her, it swamped her but settled her right down. She didn't seem hurt but will have to have been flung around in the car. An old girl like our old terrier Max (lived to 20) with lots of lumps on her, but when the mans father Bob arrived she wiggled in his arms happily and licked his face. Poor little girl. I'm glad we could take her, provide her with a safe environment while her owner assessed. Apparently he's still in so his dad said today when I rang to see how they both were. If anything would make DB drink that would have to be it. He didn't and hasn't. I'm really proud of how level headed he can be and how strong he is being.

Pamela, that is really great that DB dealt with such a hard situation so well .

And today DD4 has been handed on to another home. DB took him after work to a lovely lady who has 2 shepherds already, 1 the same age and the other 10. They all hit it off so DB left him there. I didn't think I'd cry but I am, and DB is quite upset as well. He had really bonded with him. So we have 7 months now until another young one arrives. Next time it will be a different breed altogether. 9 months old. It's already born and is being socialised first before it comes. This will be the first time they've got a dog specifically bred and sourced. A few tough weeks ahead as we miss our boy but it's how it goes. It's like one slap after another at the moment.

One slap after another
October 29 2116 my baby boy left us from this world
I still miss him hard
Can't stop the tears just thinking about him
Having the dogs around Pam is work
But the unconditional love you get in return
I can still see his face
Waiting for his food or pressing up against me when he slept
Miss him so
Me

No words Eva ❤️

So I'm in a different hospital, on Friday an ambulance took me to government hospital and they gave me the bums rush much to DB horror. They were so rude and nil compassion. The ED doctor discharged me and when a nurse queried it she said loudly, she's got her drugs she can manage from home. On Saturday my condition deteriorated considerable so my mum and DB took me to a private hospital where I was admitted within 2 hours, given morphine and medazolam and not made to feel like a drug addict.

I've written notes from my RPH experience and when I'm better I'm going to actually complain. No one, no-one ever should have to go through what I went through and be treated so appallingly. When they discharged me they refused to get a wheelchair, despite the fact I could barely walk, there will have to be cc footage of me being dragged struggling down a 100yard passageway sobbing and then taken out to the front lobby waiting area and dumped into a hard solid gray plastic chair where I sobbed even further. The nurse then went to triage nurse and said you can ignore her she waiting on her husband. She didn't even get me a tissue. DB came in the doors and was shocked to see me sitting there.

Anyway, they took me to SJOG Murdoch yesterday and the difference was unbelievable, they got a bed, made sure I was comfortable and explained they have sourced a surgeon to see me on Monday.

DB very stressed, he saw the GP on Friday morning, he's been told tmavoidnatress wherever posssible, and is having his colonoscopy on the 20th July at the same time they will look st the Barrett's andnassessmifmtiwmgriwn ir anything. DB thinks it has.

I can't go to the football today so he's taking a good workfriend who doesn't drink. Will be nice for him to go to a game without me for a change.

Pamela, that sounds awful.

It is good that the private hospital treated you in a civilised way - I hope that things on Monday there work out well for you.

Sounds like you have been through a private hell there. It's amazing how rude some of the medical staff can be, and by the sound of it, the atmosphere in that whole hospital must be utterly toxic. So yes, you have to formally complain (after you feel a bit better).

Try to rest a bit and let the stress flow out for a while. And feeling like an addict is not a good way to look at it: dealing with intractable pain has nothing to do with addiction, it's about hanging on to dear life.

Hang in there.