Well, I've been waiting for this moment to arrive...it usually does.

I was just laying in bed, trying to fall asleep, and realized, what's that I smell on dh's breathe? He's been moody off and on for several days, and well, me, being the sensitive soul that I am, I've been suspecting something substance wise has been going on.

I'm not sure if I just confront him about it? Or just plainly state that as of this coming week, I WILL be attending Al-Anon meetings and that's just that?

I don't really feel it's up to me to confront him in an offensive/defensive manner. But I do know that if I'm suspecting as much as is going on, I'm better off looking out for me, numero uno! And let the meetings guide me from there.

Any guidance while I wait for the next meeting? I think I could certainly use some hugs

Happy to give you some hugs, Gladys.

I think the approach where you simply state you will be attending Al-Anon meetings is a good one.

There's no confrontation, just a statement that lets him know that you know.

So sorry Gladys, but good for you!

I am sorry that Hubby is back at it. Things were going so well for you both. You are on the right path Gladys!! Things can still go well for you....I have been to alanon!! It is a great place with the support that you need! For now I would lovingly detatch from hubby. I do not mean leave or kick him out....just in your heart and mind detatch from what is going on with him and keep your focus on keeping Gladys sober and healthy. It is also a great statement to him to let him know that yes you do know...he will likely be expecting a big bad reaction from you but do not give it to him....stay focused and on that even keel line...get to your meetings and take care of yourself.....those wonderful boys of yours are so lucky to have a mommy like you....and you matter to them so very much!!....focus on them...that will help pass time untill the meeting!
Thinking of you and sending those hugs you asked for I truly do hope that hubby gets back on track...meanwhile you are correct...take care of numero uno!!!!!!!Love ya Gladys!!!!!!!

I grew up with alcoholics but never attended Al-Anon. I do know Al-Anon is wonderful. Simply stating to your husband where your going is enough to let him know you know what he's doing. Yelling wont help. Take care of you first because you don't need any temptation or stress.

Thanks

I told him today that I am going to start going to Al-Anon meetings. I need them in my life right now. I told him that I'm dealing with some inner emotions and need a support group right now, as we certainly can't afford $25/week for me to see a therapist at this point (never mind the scheduling, transportation, etc that comes with that...meetings are only 2 blocks over)
I've known to expect that somehow he may shift blame in some way. Sure enough, it came in the form of, "everything was fine between us, no tension, until you started spending time with your mom a couple weeks ago." I said, "what tension? I'm just stressed right now, my emotions are getting me down, al-anon also works at self-esteem, and I could really use the meetings, this has nothing to do with my mom and I still love you, I'm not doing this because of anything you've done, I'm doing this to help me feel better."

I figure, if anything needs to be said about my having suspicions about him drinking again--which I can't prove and I'm not about to try to prove, I'd rather have a sponser behind me

Thanks all, for being here

Bravo, Gladys! YOU GO, GIRL! I think you are handling this beautifully!

Let us know how the meeting goes this week, k?