In November of last year, I suffered a ruptured aneurysm in my brain that required surgery. I spent a month in the neurosurgical ICU and another month at an inpatient rehabilitation hospital learning how to walk, talk and regain my fine motor function again. Prior to the hemorrhage, I worked as an Emergency Medical Technician. I knew something was seriously wrong once the symptoms began. I was lucky in the sense that I did not hesitate to have someone take me immediately to the ED from where I was airlifted to a Level I center. There are days that I feel so utterly blessed to be alive and recovering, and other days where I feel so depressed and sad that I don't even want to get out of bed. When those days come, I feel guilty for feeling that way. I am so used to being called to help other people when they are in need, I have a hard time asking anyone to help me. Because of that, I feel lonely and isolated alot.

My therapists have said that my recovery so far has been tremendous. The left sided nerve pain may or may not go away, but it has diminished tremendously since the bleed. I still have trouble finding my words sometimes if I am tired or stressed. I also have some coordination problems that still linger. I hate when my brain tells my left hand to do something and she doesn't want to listen!

My close friend, 'sister' and kindred spirit Eva, referred me to this site, and I am hoping to meet and communicate with others that understand what I have been through. Inside I'm still the same me.

Ms Eva, This was inspirational to read & gives me hope for my upcoming procedure for a Pipeline Stent.. It will be the third time the Dr. willl try; the first two times i started to hemmorage & he had to abort the procedure. I go in again on May 24th and am hopeing that it will work this time. I am so scared of a rupture; yet have alot of anxiety re" the procedure. I have asked for some feedback on this site; but thus far haven't received any. I think the idea of this site is certainly a good one. I wasjjust diagnosed with my aneurysm in Jan 2012. Mine is an extremly broad necked left posterior cerebral artery

hi eva

happy to see you came on

hope you feel better

Hello my darling....I hope you're feeling better too.

Hey belladonna2. I wish you the very best with your procedure, though I am not familiar with it. It is now that I am trying to research as much as I can about aneurysms, effects post surgery and recovery. I will pray that the procedure works this time, and I do hope you will let me know how it turns out. Good luck to you and God Bless.

dear sis, friend, confidant,

i was thinking of you
hope you are taking the
empowered approach
stand firm

someone who cares
and loves you
just think back
when you were
writing my name
to my time card
no clue who i was
or where i came from

true sisters
in my eyes
and GOD

PRAISE GOD

Hi MsEva_EMS

It is not surprising that you are feeling the way you are. Your body has been through an incredible physical, emotional and psychological trauma and it takes a long time - and often some help to get past that.

This is a good place to come and vent. Unless you have been through something like this, you have no idea how much it affects not only your body and mind, but also your confidence and sense of 'you'.

I am one of the (very) fortunate ones who found my aneurysm before it 'found me' - and I had clipping surgery to fix it. Even unruptured, it took me a long time to get back to normal.

Depression, such as you are feeling is incredibly common in this situation, so please don't be afraid (or feel guilty) to ask for a hand up when you are down. After all, this was a near death experience for you and I am very sure that the advice I am giving you would be the first advice you would give to anyone in your situation.

The brain heals very slowly, and I was told it would take up to two years to recover to my best. Even though I didn't rupture, I have MS, so that slowed me right down too. Even after that time, improvements can occur.

You have been in a position of caring for others - so ask yourself what you would say to others in your place. Be gentle, listen to you body and make sure that you have a support network around you. You have been through so much already.

Hugs and welcome

Lyn

it takes a long time to recover from this , i went down with a aneurysm on 6-7-10 , have had seven different surgeries , three strokes , the right side of my face filled with fluid like a water ballon , i had a drain shunt installed and had nothing but problems with it , it was replaced this past december and i still here it running in my head , i still struggle to walk at times , to find the words i want to say , im scared to death to drive , as you some days i feel blessed to have lived threw all this and others i to lay in bed all day , every one says " oh it will get better " yea well when will that be , its like living on 30 miles of dirt road and i belive it will never be smoth again

please keep the FAITH
eva and myself are co-workers
sisters in SPIRIT
a beautiful woman
who has it crumbling
but she has to keep
the FAITH ALIVE

love you sis

your other half

someone who cares

Thank you all for the support you have shown me. It is greatly appreciated!! I know that I still have a long way to go and I work on it every day. My sister, Eva, I don't know what I would do without you...I don't. You help me through some of the confusion and the fog and I love you so much. God bless everyone here. I hope I'm here a lot more often.