Hi everyone

I am sorry if this comes across as a major whinge, but at the moment I am trying to complete a graduate certificate in management communications and I am just so damned tired I can hardly take in any info at all.

It is so frustrating - I used to be so on the ball, and so quick, now it seems like I am fighting for everything I want to do.

I am just so annoyed with my brain - that it is letting me down when I have something to prove to myself - that I am not brain dead, I have not suddenly become stupid.

People who know just don't understand (except my wonderful husband). I don't want to be thought of as lazy but I can't seem to shake the damn fatigue that seems to dog my every step.

Mostly I don't disclose - why bother? People just assume that I am fine, but my brain just doesn't seem to hold information anymore. If I do, I feel like I am asking for something I am not entitled to.

Outside, I look fine - inside, although the doc has told me that I will be fine I feel like a mess.

I wish people would understand that when we do something special, it is even more special than it is for others.

OK, enough whining for now. Sorry this is such a miserable post.

Lyn

Hi Lynn,

I understand how you feel. I struggle everyday with my brain as it isn't what it used to be before my rupture.

I worked in corporate banking for 20 years. Last year I resigned, the stress and headaches were getting to me. Six months later, I had a rupture. I believe things happen for a reason. Had I been working at the time of my rupture, I may not have made it. I was home with my son when it happened and he was able to call my husband and ambulance.

It's been 9 months since my rupture and whenever I pick up something to read, I have to read it twice more times to understand it. I tell myself I'm still in recovery but it is frustrating when I help my kids with their homework and I need help to understand their homework first!

Take things slow, I have read that brain injury takes a very long time to heal. I get better everyday, but I have to work at it. Reading comprehension and focus are my two biggest challenges.

Be kind and patient to yourself, there are a lot of people out there with disabilities who have found ways to get around theirs. We just have to find our ways.

Keep up the faith! And good luck to you!

Maria

Hun please don't beat yourself up!! I am still hiding my own Easter eggs!! The brain takes a very long time to heal and only if you don't constanly overload it!! It sounds like you are trying to achieve a lot during your healing process! I still can't comprehend and my motor skills are still poor. You have to give your brain time to slow down and heal sometimes!! I know how hard it is and we just want our essance back. I can't remember anything short term!!! I get so confused so easy!!!
I am a year June from my rupture, but 1 year since my last surgery this month!! Rupture patients take a couple years for the blood to absorb into our brains. I keep hearing 2 years is the turning point? I hope so!!! You just have to have patience hun!! Brain trauma is the most serious of all!! I miss being a firefighter, but I know that I am so far off from that it is a pipe dream!! I am just happy to be alive and we are very lucky to have survived a rupture!! Esp. if since we don't have any limb loss or worst?? They say the more you stimulate your brain, like playing scrabble... is very good. I play word circle, computer games... Drinking water is very important!! Blueberries are supposed to be brain food, help memory... The heathier you eat the better you will do! You need to find an outlet for your frustration!! That's why I write poetry!! Listen to music, anything to soothe you!!! Please try to not beat yourself up, this is not your fault and we are lucky to even be here!! You should be proud of what you accomplish, not be in such a hurry and try to enjoy life a little more! Take care and know that you are not the only one that feels that way everyday!! Believe me, it is one of our main conversations when we talk on the phone! My hubby keeps reminding me that he is just glad to have me here and he doesn't care how "screwy" I am, LOL!! He reminds me of what is important when I get upset!! I will keep you in my prayers hun!! Love always Tricia

G'day Lyn, Know how you feel, I just would like to be my oldself again, this is why sites like these are so important as we can relate to what we are going through.
P.S Brain Talk 1 site is up and running too.
Takecare Mate