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Old 05-13-2008, 04:56 AM #31
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Default Hello Peace of Mind

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Originally Posted by Peace of Mind View Post
Sorry Brokenfriend, I didn't realize you were in the OCD group as well. I know I already replied to you in the bipolar group, but only because I really identified with your symptoms and how you were feeling. I try to tell all who have similar symptoms what worked for me. I'm curious too if the excercises, I suggested help others. I was ready to throw in the towel, until recieving a combo of therapies, antidepressants, CBT, EDMR, and yoga. The yoga did wonders for me. Now I work full time as a staff accountant. A really brainy job that keeps my mind focused. Caution: Some yoga is stimulating and some is calming... Stick with the calming poses.
Exercise helps only a little. I've been a weight lifter,I've taken boxing lessons,I've taken Karate lessons,I've jogged,I've walked,and worn out shoes. I'll even work on science projects,and other projects. Thanks' though. A good punching bag helps. I need to buy a punching bag again. Yoga,and some Karate Kata procedures are similar. It doesn't help me very much. I hope it helps others. If I would start off with yoga,I'd curve back to the Kata procedures in Karate. I was into that for awhile. Brokenfriend
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Old 05-15-2008, 06:16 AM #32
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Default Hi Broken friend

Thanks for asking about my son,he seems to be coping better at school at the moment,they have managed to keep him and this other child separate.Has big problems with eating at school often doesn't touch his packed lunch,he says its the mess and people eating bananas makes him feel really sick.I dont really know if I should be doing anything to stop his massive dislike of bananas,if we have them in the house he gets so worked up and angry.
Unfortunatly I have had a couple of bad months with my PD,the medication caused me to become very obsesive.I'd turn the computer on in the morning spend all day on it,forgetting about everything didn't do housework,have no food for dinner,late getting kids from school.I would seem hard done by if I had to stop to help kids with homework or if they needed the computer.For about a month most nights I would sit at the computer from 10pm right through to 7am.I would often just be watching to see if anyone was posting.some nights no posts ,it just seems silly how obsessions can effect us so much.I would also go on msn,but unfortuanatly meds made me hyper and I would flirt and go to far with people.Got obsessions with different people
wanted to know where they were all the time,obsessed with trying to get their msn adresses just so I could chat to them.Once I had got their adresses the thrill seemed not to be there as much as before.Anyway enough about me .Due to how I have been acting some of my sons issues have got worse probably feeling unsecure.I have changed my meds starting to feel a bit better but still having to fight some of my obsessions,I realise how I am effects my kids so I'm trying really hard,its just not easy.
My son has been off sick for the last three days,when his ill he gets alot more frustrated about things .Things have to be done a certain way and things have to be in the right places.His feeling much better today but he hasn't eaten much at all over the last week,think things are putting him off, he gets so frustrated about the smallest of things,but I guess that all part of OCD.
He still uses the punch bag to get rid of some of his anger and also still does his judo.
Thanks again for your post its good to have people who care and understand.
Dotty.
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Old 05-15-2008, 05:17 PM #33
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Default Hello dotty

I'm so glad that you are back. I'm sorry that your son has been ill. When I get physically ill,I become more troubled also,most of the time. I'm also glad that they are keeping the bully away from him. That's wonderful.

We are all unique,and different. I didn't like eating around people because they make me nervous,and the cafeteria is to big,and stirs up my phobias. I have a fear of being in masses of people. I had troubles in class,the auditorium(that was like walking into hell,I was so scared),but I could not avoid it. Back in those days,I don't think that they coined up the word phobia yet. It took a toll on me.

I've seen those late night seminar claims,and I've heard them all. I even went to the Phobia Clinic in around 1982 when the clinic started,and went though the program. A lady took me up tall buildings,and we went across bridges,and everything. I'm still having problems.There is still hope with many peoples wisdom,and I'm seeking it.

I like bananas though,all of us are scared of our own particular things. Maybe another kid made a face at him with a banana,or chewed up banana.There is something in the back of his mind that creates this fear,and is probably from a memory in some way,shape,or form from school. Is he afraid of spiders? There is a common myth that sometimes Tarantulas come to this country in the banana boxes.This is not true. I worked in a Supermarket for 14 years,and I uncapped enough boxes of them to know. The reason we open the boxes of bananas is to release the inert gas that keeps the bananas green.

Does he become fixated on bananas for more then 10 minutes. The doctor that told you to not worry about his OCD sounds like a nice guy,but before this problem becomes a full blown melt down,I believe that he would greatly benefit from therapy. It doesn't sound like mild OCD. It sounds like fear,and many emotions are involved. I don't want to alarm you at all. Please follow up on his illness,and find a councilor,preferably a psychiatrist who can write medicine proscriptions.

With me Luvox helps the OCD part of my illness. Those fixations don't have the power in my thoughts that they use to. I don't think that Luvox is habit forming. I could be wrong. It would be best to ask your doctor. Medicines like Luvox has to accumulate in your body for six,to eight weeks before they can help you. That brought my thoughts into management,unless someone is out there alarming,and scarring me all the time.

My sister keeps alarming me about my financial situation,and she was hostile to me on the telephone for no reason at all this week. She just will never, ever get it. In the last several years since I have moved up here close to my sister,she has alarmed me over,and over,and has become increasingly critical. I cannot do anything for her that she likes. She's not only critical of me,but of many,many people,and other family members. It hasn't done me any good to here such anger,and bitterness. Now she has turned on me.

She has a illness also,so I'm taking things into consideration,but she's tearing me to pieces with her words just like dad did in his temper tantrums. She still doesn't get it. Why come down hard on a person who is troubled. Someone out there please pray for us. I am a good person. She's having problem's beyond what I understand. It's like a free floating hatred,anger,and hysteria,and I haven't done anything. I'm waiting on Social Security Disability,and Social Services. Long story,and I didn't get like this over night. I've been troubled since I was around 13,or 14 years old. I'm sorry dotty,I've strayed off the subject a little.

Computers are addictive aren't they. I've been pulling myself away from them after a short period of time. A couple of weeks ago I was on this computer all night long for two nights in a rowe. When I do that the tension pain in my chest gets painful also.

I have to remember that balance is a good thing. A little computer time,cleaning,and other things are good in balance. Actually balance is a good practice to have about everything. I'm glad that you came back. I was worried,because I know that these things don't usually go away by themselves. We need help,medication sometimes,therapy,or support.

My obsessions would start as a scary thought,and get bigger,and bigger,and would become so massive,that I couldn't understand it anymore,and I'd become confused,and then the thought would decrease little,by little. Then I'd have at least three more of these type of thought intrusions,over a short period of time,until things calmed down.

These thoughts became confusing, and irrational,and all blown out of proportion. Sometimes the thoughts would come about the same thing that bothered me before,but with a little twist. If I tried to figure them out,they would become worse. Finally Luvox helped me. I still have problems,but the thoughts don't stick like they use to. I still have plenty of other problems emotionally.

This OCD thing didn't hit me until I was well into my thirties. I had the phobias,dread,nervous tension,and depression from the time I was about 13 years old. My parents said that I did "stupid" types of things,insinuated,but not said, when I was under 10 years of age,and laughed. I heard these things for years. I heard it from my Mother,and then my sister in the last 4 years. Mom died last fall. I realized what it was,that they where talking about. Do you understand what a compulsion is? I told them recently. I was obsessed with that. It had to do with our curtains. They stopped talking about it. It seemed to be funny to them before. The last time Mom told me about it,she was laughing so hard that she could almost not explain it. The damage was already done by then,and I tried to educate them as to what it was.

What I don't understand is why my own family thought that it was funny. I also heard that I got a spanking from my dad,and they said I said,now can I play with the curtains.Now I know that my IQ is higher then they implied. I don't know what was wrong with the attitude here. I know that my sister is unforgiving of my Mother because she didn't love us very much. I just don't understand this. I didn't have these feeling toward them. I did have a struggle forgiving Dad for his anger at me when he was drinking. Then we got along very well for decades.

When my mother,and Dad moved up to where my sister lived,my dads attitude changed toward me. He had a stroke,and my sister took care of him. From everything that I've heard to this day,they both spoke bad things about me. Pam screamed at me on the telephone about 6 years ago,and we didn't speak very much to each other for a year. I believe she has put a wedge between Dad,and I,because dad doesn't want me to visit. I know my sister's in contact with him. All of this hurts me. I'm sorry dotty,I've gotten off the subject again. I'm just hurting.

My OCD started when I was about 6,or 7,but It didn't blow up until I was in my 30's.This type of behavior was totally misunderstood. My Psychiatrist said that Doctors knew about OCD in the 1950's. I never heard of it until about 1990. I as diagnosed with this as part of my problem in the 1990's. They said I had other problems such as free floating anxiety,Borderline personality disorder,depression,and panic disorder back in the 70's,and 80's. Now I here OCD. I wonder do I have a combination of all of these,or something else yet to be discovered. I feel like a mess.

I may be Bipolar also. I'm going to another doctor soon to fine out. By the way,these thoughts are called obsessions. If you would do something in response to the obsession,it's called a compulsion. Some people claim that if you do not respond to the obsession with a compulsion,you can get a healing from it. I believe that It's called cognitive therapy. If this is true,and it may be,get him help before it becomes forged into his personality.

It seems to take the wisdom of many people to pull me up out of my broken pieces. There are probably allot of people like me. If this is true,I wish they would talk about it. That way it would be known that it is a real problem,and more solutions would be available. It's nothing to be ashamed of. It's a genetic problem that comes down the family tree. I hope that researchers are working on it around the clock. Brokenfriend

Last edited by Brokenfriend; 05-15-2008 at 05:36 PM.
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Old 05-16-2008, 03:08 AM #34
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Default I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for writing replies that are long. Could this be a disorder? Sorry. Brokenfriend
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Old 05-16-2008, 08:31 AM #35
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Hi BF and Dotty, I am sorry that you are both suffering. BF I agree with therapy. We become anxious when we grow up feeling insecure. The treatment is to find security. The cognitive behavioral therapy that you spoke of helps here because it helps us to examine why we are feeling insecure. Because the environment when we grew up made us feel insecure we just continue to feel this way even though our environment as adults is much more secure if not completely secure. The treatment is to convince yourself that you are in a secure environment and that you should, therefore, start to feel secure instead of continuing to feel insecure like you did as a child when your environment really was insecure. Dotty, it seems like your son doesn't feel like he is in a secure environment. I think that therapy would be good for both of you.
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:06 AM #36
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Default Brokenfriend

I find it very helpful reading your posts.I'm glad you can open up and share what you have been through and what you are still going through.
Although I don't have ocd my family while I was growing up always seemed to be putting me down.I struggled at school found the schoolwork really hard,my family really just made out I was useless and would not achieve much.It has kept with me,its made me have very low self esteem.I guess in a way its made me alot stronger mum.I fight for my kids,two of them have full special needs statements,that was without support from the school.I encourage them and help with homework,always trying to build on their self esteem.My husband who has ocd and who is very clever finds it very hard to keep patient doesn't understand how the kids dont understand homework.
I understand where you are coming from about family .I know mine seems nothing compared with what you have had to go through.
I have to go now but will finish answering your post later.Take Care Dotty
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Old 05-18-2008, 04:50 AM #37
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Thank you dotty. I can tell that your hurting,and are concerned about your children. Try to be patient with your husband. Some people don't understand in the beginning,but prove that they care down the road. Maybe he will learn how to accept the children's learning difficulties.

In your sons case,it probably has something to do with his OCD type of thing. I failed two grades,and ended up in military school,and my IQ is above average. I had reading,consentrational distraction problems,confusion,and anxiety problems when I studied. That was perceived as a possibility of non intelligence in the 50's. The teachers must not have known anything whatsoever about learning difficulties in those days.

They know now. If your children are not getting help by the school,I believe that the school is being negligent,and they know better. I'm not sure though. Don't they have councilors who can send them to specialists,who can diagnose the children's special problem,and come up with a plan on how to help the child? You can always email your congressman,and he can look into a matter. Brokenfriend
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Old 10-09-2008, 04:13 PM #38
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Default :)

Hello.
I have what used to be termed pure 'O' but they now think that the thoughts can also be compulsions. Unfortunately, I also seek assurance from others as an overt compulsion. It is usually in relation to me somehow thinking I've hurt someone else's feelings, I've made them angry, I've not done my job, etc. It can be so debilitation.

I have had a therapist for over 3 years now. What I used to think was an attachment issue I now know is OCD. I must have always been seeking his reassurance compulsively. I guess now I have to stop this. Ugh. The thought is just too much to handle.

I wish you the best.
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Old 04-02-2009, 02:53 AM #39
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Default Hello

Hey guys, how you going? I was just reading your posts on OCD and I completely relate. It's so frustrating and robs you of your life. Just a quick update of where I'm up to with OCD...

I've lived with it for 15 years now- mine manifests itself in the scrupulerosity (sp)?form- extreme notions of right and wrong/ good and bad.
I've been through much the same thought patterns as everyone else it seems. Tried religion -bad move for my type , contemplated suicide and whether or not a 'biological malfunction' has a place in the world- (please excuse this term- it is not mean to cause offence, it's what i see myself as), and now I'm concentrating on the neurological side of things. Can I manipulate my neurology? In what ways besides meds? I have decided personally that religion is a human concept so I dont believe any devine intervention is going to occur. The fact is I have a neurological imbalance that so many others suffer from. The question is... if there is no way out am I willing to continue?

I started seeing a new psych and told him all the things that I feel are wrong with me and he said- 'But there are so many things right with you, why don't we start with that'. Problem is, even if the rest of you is right you can't reach it with OCD- it's like a bridge that I can't cross but I have a memory of what the other side 'feels' like. Sometimes I reach a good place where I feel balanced only I'm always aware that I can't stay. Is it worth continuing when you struggle more than you enjoy? I know the person I wanna be- biology wont allow it. CBT has been the greatest help so far- is hope.
Also- it's funny what your neurology will respond to. Also, how much resilience does a person have?

Much love to you guys- I know exactly how it feels.

Molly
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Old 04-04-2009, 04:13 AM #40
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You're not alone.

Your symptoms are at a high level. I have anxiety but not to this degree.

I was 40 years old and had to learn how to breathe. Yoga and PT. Yes, stick with the relaxing Yogas. You may need a class or 3 for instruction on breathing and movement. I know that sounds stupid, but it's not really. It's very good for relaxing.

There's also just breathing techniques that can help relieve tension. Breath in slowly and deeply through your nose. then blow out slowly by pursing your lips. Do this X 3. Also good at night when you can't sleep.

The heavy chest/chest pains I do know about. Sometimes a drive does help, just a change of scenery. I like being around water for relaxing too. seems to be calming to me.

Work is good therapy. Doesn't necessarily mean you have to get a full time job right now. just something to start with. not overwhelming.

Unfortunately, when I need someone to understand when I'm having issues and anxiety has just kicked into overdrive, I too know that lonely, nobody-understands-or-cares feeling. I don't think I'm pittying myself. I just can't find nobody to console me about it.

...and after that's passed and I've worked it out myself... again, I realize that there's nobody to console me about it even then. so, I know where you're coming from with that feeling. I guess it's our beast to bear, my friend.

Here's a hug for you. I like hugs too. don't get that either...

Humor and laughter is a natural cure for the moment. I like laughing a lot.

Animals can be a stress reliever too.

Don't give up. Be realistic and try to laugh about things.

Don't let anxiety have control over your day. give it some time but take the rest for yourself. You deserve it. You are a good person. I know that by what you're writing. I've read your posts and you're reaching out to help others. We need you.

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Hello I can completely relate to what has been said. I'm new to this website and forum,and I'm at total lose of what to do. I have been through many theroputic sessions,7 psychiatrists,1 psychialogists,3 churches,three prayer groups,and much theropy.My first panic attack happened when I was about 14,or 15. No one understood then. When I was 18 I drank for relief. I stoped drinking in my late 20's. I've been everywhere,and there has been nothing but one misunderstanding after another. People have made some of the strangest diagnoses that has sent me into a tailspin at times. I have considered suicide. I've tried many medicines. I've been through the phobia clinic's treatment,where they would take me to high buildings,and into crowds,and etc. I also feel a need to confess,and need reassurances from people. Sometimes I ask again to be sure. I have these condemning thoughts.I have these out of control worries,intrusive images,thoughts,and at times immagined feallings somewhat,but I know that they aren't real. Sometimes when someone leans closely to me,I have a repelling fealing,and lean away from them. I don't know why,I sure need a hug. It's almost like a reverse magnetic reaction affect. I have pain in my chest most of the time. It starts in the middle of my chest,and goes to the left under my ribcage. This pain,and uncertainty is what's bothering me the most right now. I didn't use to have it,but it developed over time.I worked myself to death for about 15 years,and I became so disturbed,that I would be up at night with bouts of anxiety,and stress,and there was no relief. I woke up and would have panic attacks immediateley while I was waking up.Sometimes I'm so anxious around people that my knees have stiffened while sitting down,and It's obvious to me when I begin to stand.The list goes on. No one knows what to do for me.My relatives who know me don't know what to do for me.I haven't been through much theropy in the last 17 years because the people who have tried to help me have made so many mistakes. It seems like I've been walking through a maze,and I don't know where to go,or what to do. I'm not working now because all of this has caught up with me. The pain,I'm tired of it all,and I want it to end. I want to end it. This isn't life,it's very much so torment. I cannot get help from Social Security Dissability. They are obviously doing there best to dodge me,and this is another aggrivation,and I'm tired of it all. Is anyone else going through what I'm going through,because I certainly feel like the odd one,yet I'm not. My intelligence is up,but my of how I do things is hindered by the way my mind doesn't process things properly. They thought that I was slow when I was in elementary school in the 1950's. They didn't know anything about my illnesses then,and learning disabilities,and grinding my teeth in my sleep,but they know allot now. Is there anything that they can do for this pain in my chest? This is something that doesn't go away,and It drives me up the wall. It let's up at different times of the day,but it comes right back. Can anyone out there relate to what I've said,and how aggrivated I feel. Just don't hit me with a hammer,and tell me that it's my fault. I'm a good person,and moral,but I'm very aggrivated,because I feel like people have turned their back on me,and I don't know what to do. I have had to move,and this has been hard on me,and I don't know where to go. Can anyone relate to this,or am I in the wrong place.:
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