Hi Momtogrif, I have recovered from anxiety. I feel like I have some good insight into it. What is BTDT? Do either you or his dad suffer from anxiety?

my daughter who is 8 has the facial tics for a while now....the calmer I am ..and act like I dont notice the better I think she is....
hugsss and good luck, sarah

BTDT means been there, done that!

Hmm, my dh has issues and has had them since childhood. I think he has different stuff that borders on phobias, he hates everything and everyone, etc. He is anxious in a different way: like he's doom and gloom about the world but he doesn't 'worry' the way we'd speak of it and he didn't suffer from 'anxiety' as a child. He had some LD's and was ADHD. I wasn't an anxious person until I met and married my dh. AFter a few years with him, I started picking up on his 'glass half empty' attitude and I fight it daily. I also think my dh suffers from depression as does most of his family. They are all on some sort of antidepressant of some kind!
Hey, any insight you have would be well received!

Hi Momtogrif, after I have recovered from anxiety I understand now how I developed it. I feel that most emotional disorders that we develop (not schizophrenia or bipolar, etc.) occur because of development that didn't go well because of our environment when we were children. Therefore, with your son's case I would suggest that he feels anxiety because he does not feel secure due to your's and your husband's anxieties. Think about it, our children read us very well and pick up on our anxieties (my children picked up on mine and it did affect them). Our children feel secure if they are in a secure environment. Any insecurities that we feel are amplified for our children because they do not have the thinking abilities or coping mechanisms of an adult. The whole point of me directing you to the source is that is where real recovery will occur. You can treat a child until you are blue in the face but if you correct the source of the problem you really resolve the issues. I am of the opinion that almost all child therapy must center on the parents because they are the real power brokers in the situation. The parents must change the environment that the child is experiencing. I feel that this is the best way to help the child. I also feel that parents need to approach this with an open mind. I understand how our immediate reflex is to protect our own egos and not want to really look at ourselves.

What are LD's?

LD's are Learning Disabilities. Well, my dh is the anxious one and the one who blows EVERYTHING out of proportion and I don't see him changing any time soon! He isn't anxious like in having nervous energy but he's paranoid and thinks the world is out to get him. Now, he knows this is a problem for him but I just don't see him working on this. Most days he's a great dad and takes ds out to play tennis and golf and teaches him card games. He tells our ds that he loves him on a daily basis and he comforts him when needed. He attends our counseling sessions and is very honest with our counselor that he has 'issues'. Anyway, I totally hear where you're going and I will do what I can to keep my fears at bay!
Thanks!

Hi Momtogrif, maybe if your husband could just not vocalize his fears in front of your son? Children look to us to feel safe and the picture of the world that your husband is painting for your child might be pretty frightening?