Hello, everyone, my names matty, i dont know if i am an alcoholic, as i only drink friday to sunday, then through the week im sobar, but then it all begins again on friday. I drink about 10 pints on fri, 15 to 20 sat, then anything i can on sunday to feel better (hair of dog). iv been doing this for about 7 years and im only 24

because of this i suffer from fits and panic attcks where i feel like theres a lump in my throat and i cant breath so i hyperventilate, i sometimes lie in my bed awake but i am paralysed and cant move, it only lasts for a about 30 seconds and i snap out of it. it very scary and i feel like im going to die,

i also get very strange thoughts, like for example, i could be sat at a bus stop and look at a man walking his dog, and i'd make up this big scene in my head, like ""hes going to start kicking his dog and then eating it, and then a cars going crash into him and everythings on fire"" - totally irrational thinking, im not a violent person, yet i get strange thoughts around violence and death and embarrasment, i told my mate and he thinks its creative, but i think its messed up,

my questions are:

1) am i an alcoholic despite the fact i drink 3 days a week?
2) have i probably perminantly damaged my head and mind (the way i think)over the last 7 years?
3) Am i actually going insane - with the wiered thoughts?
4) is there any hope to get rid of my uncontrolable wiered thoughts?


thanks for reading if anyone is out there,
Matty

Hi Matty and welcome to Neurotalk

although I agree that alcohol can seriously mess with one's mind, yet it also sounds like you might be dealing with more, and often it is a chemical imbalance that can cause these things. It may well be that you are attempting to self medicate with the alcohol which sadly, as you have learned, only masks the symptoms temporarily and then leaves you feeling worse

my son suffers with intense OCD and needs to take supplements that keep his serotonin levels elevated. Some people find medications help with this (my son had yuck side effects from those so chose the other treatments)

the crux of the matter is that if these thoughts, moods and panic attacks are at the stage where you are worried, you really should consider a medical check up.

also thinking you may want to post on our alcohol/addictions forum http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum31.html

hope you get answers and help

Hi Matty and WELCOME to Neurotalk!!

I see that Chemar has given you a link to get you started.

Please feel free to roam around and join in anywhere you feel comfortable.

Everyone here is very kind, caring, and understanding. If you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask. Someone will always be around shortly to help you out any way we can.

I hope to see you around the boards.

Abbie

Hi, Matty, welcome to NeuroTalk!

I'm very concerned about your experiences when drinking, I'm sure it's not unheard of, but it does sound quite extreme.

I would feel a lot better if you visited your physician for a check-up and explained this to him/her.

Can you do without the drink or is it a weekend "must" for you?

I know a few older alcoholics whose minds are not as sharp as when we were young. Much of their lives has been seriously disrupted due to the drink. Please consider what your life may mean to others and see if you can't skip a few weekends.

Binge drinking, and this sounds more like you, is much more
damaging to the brain, than longer term lesser drinking. High concentrations of alcohol kill brain cells faster.

Some people who crave alcohol have a disorder called pyroluria.
This is a deficiency in Vitamin B6 (pyridoxine) and zinc.

It is genetic and causes alot of anxiety and panic feelings.

You can read about it more here:

http://www.drkaslow.com/html/pyroluria.html
http://www.diagnose-me.com/cond/C372380.html

It is amazing the high % of people who have this and are abusing alcohol as a self medication.

This is one lab doing the test:
http://www.kryptopyrrole.com/
It does not need a doctor's order.

There are other labs if you Google the subject.

If you test positive for this, you may be able to stop your craving for alcohol, and also decrease your anxiety and increase your chances for more normal functioning.

If you obtain an elevated response, I suggest you find a holistic doctor or a DAN doctor (Defeat Autism Now) to help guide you thru the supplement process safely.

Your use of alcohol is excessive, and you may find help with Alcoholics Anonymous. Some people do and some don't.

Good luck!

Welcome to NT

You know, you're being so honest with your post, honest with yourself, about yourself, I think it was very heartfelt. asking for help is a giant step. I'm proud of you.

You know something else. When we examine ourself, we often find things we don't like about ourself. Can we make things better? Sure we can. Can we make it go away? Probably not. You learn to control those demons within, so to say.

This is a start. Make a plan to seek out these answers and follow though.

We're here if you need us.

It's not easy to lay it out like that. That was a big step and I'm proud of you for doing that.

I don't know if you're an alcoholic, but you seem to be very much in control. Maybe you just need to let go on the weekend. a pint of what? 10 to 12 is a lot.

You could get a good medical checkup. It's a good feeling to get that over with. Don't put it off.

Caution on the advice you get, and from whom.