[Mark in Idaho]

The spousal relationship between a brain injured spouse and healthy care giving spouse is unique and has different needs than a parent-child relationship.

I am starting this thread in hope that spouses, especially wives, find a way to connect and support each other.

I will try to avoid the compulsion to comment and in so doing leave this thread to the wives. I hope others will do the same.

I will even try to get my wife to check in occasionally. She is a wonderful caring and understanding person.

Hopefully, we can start a good community of spouses helping each other. It will be best if this thread stays in a support and caring format so the others, like me, etc. will not interrupt with our comments.

So, ladies and the few husbands in this situation, reach out at touch someone.

My best to you all.

[vini]

yes mark hope some of the lurkers may be cares would be good to see them having the own support threads there needs may differ from ours in some respects

thanks mark for all your input

[wtrpk]

my husband has been wonderful. I cry, ask him a million questions, etc and he has been very supportive. I know its stressing him out too..t.aking care of the kids back and forth to games and practices, weekends are a nightmare running around, he's exhausted, but he has been the best. I know I must be driving him nuts as the depression and anxiety is over the top, but he really tries to keep me grounded.

[Mark in Idaho]

aireyden,

If your hubby ever has some moments to spare, have him check in with us. As he posts about the struggles he has caring for you and the family, others can offer support.

[wtrpk]

Mark...I wish I could say he could or would...he is so strapped for time. He works over an hour away from home...coaches basketball and baseball for our sons...takes them to all the practices...and does most of the food shopping. I just started going to the grocery store for a few things last week.

Right now...can't ask him to add anything else...but if you have a specific question I will ask...and reply.

[Toni S]

Mark,
I think this would be a great way for my husband to seek advise, vent, etc.

I know he gets extremely frustrated at times with me a& this only adds to the stress of us all.
For me some things are there, as they used to be & some things just aren't. I know for me, at times, I still get very angry. I know he does. I've ask him on several occasions to go to some kind of support group or read about mTBI / PCS so he can know, understand etc a little more of what I'm going through too.
I can't help but get frustrated with myself especially when I know & see his frustration...
Hopefully I can get him to at least check it out...

Toni

[dysfungirl]

Thats the kind of thing I need, how my husband of almost one year are supposed to deal with my PCS. We had some problems communicating before, so now it seems so much more difficult. He has taken on some of the things I did before, but at the same time he doesn't seem to understand my limitations.

It doesn't help that because of all the steps I have to go thru to see a specialist he says we don't really know what is is, and that I have always been this way... or that he won't take the time to read up on it at all. I feel like I have been dealing with most of this on my own since I go diagnosed in the E.R. in Jan. this year. And I know the anxiety pushes him farther away, hes my "safety net". If anyone has any suggestions, please I really need them. Thanks.

[Mark in Idaho]

It is important for the spouse to understand the symptoms. The best way for this is to download and print out the TBI Survival Guide. It can be read online or downloaded and printed out at www.tbiguide.com
Read it and highlight and write notes in the margins about the symptoms you are having. It may be easier for them to understand when the communication struggles between spouses dealing with PCS do not get in the way.

I will have my wife check in on this thread tomorrow if she has time.

My best to you all.

[Jeff Johnson]

I am a rookie so please bear with me. I suffered a TBI in 12/06. We had a picture perfect American Dream type family. Along with a TBI comes personality changes. The seperation/divorce rate among survivors during the two year after math of a TBI is way above the national average. My x wife gave 110% of her love, time, support and effort. I wish the TBI and divorce never happened. I want to help others facing this potential problem. I will be glad to share my stories, and because I wish the seperation/divorce never happened it is rare for me to critisize my x wife.
(p.s. we have two sons, now ages 15 + 16)
Change the things I can change? Accept the things I cannot change? Wisdom to know the difference? Well,,,,,,,,,, I certainly am working on this.

Originally Posted by Mark in Idaho

The spousal relationship between a brain injured spouse and healthy care giving spouse is unique and has different needs than a parent-child relationship.

I am starting this thread in hope that spouses, especially wives, find a way to connect and support each other.

I will try to avoid the compulsion to comment and in so doing leave this thread to the wives. I hope others will do the same.

I will even try to get my wife to check in occasionally. She is a wonderful caring and understanding person.

Hopefully, we can start a good community of spouses helping each other. It will be best if this thread stays in a support and caring format so the others, like me, etc. will not interrupt with our comments.

So, ladies and the few husbands in this situation, reach out at touch someone.

My best to you all.

[Anya13]

Hi, I am new to the site as well. I hate to complain, I just needed to find somewhere that may have some insight into what other people who's spouses have a MTBI. It's been difficult at times and I love my husband dearly, but I sometimes struggle with the mood changes and the other personality changes that he has acquired due to his injury. I was just hoping to find other people with similar experiences that can offer support.