[Alffe]

In January of 2003, Julia and Kevin Sherbun lost their son Nicholas to suicide. They didn't know he was in such terrible pain and everyone was shocked when they heard.

"There were no notable signs or symptoms that he had depression, or any indication that he was suicidal," said Kevin. "It was one of those things. We couldn't believe it happened to us."

But it did, and now the Sherbuns share their story in the hopes of preventing any other family from going through what they did. The Sherbuns work with the Yellow Ribbon Program, an acclaimed national suicide prevention program for high school students through the Suicide Prevention Council.

For a year they couldn't even talk about Nicholas' death. Research shows that it is typically up to 3 years before survivors feel they are beginning to heal. "Our new philosophy is that if we can just save one student every time we go and speak it's worth the pain of going and speaking to them," said Julia.

"I know we have impacted and saved lives." said Kevin. A multitude of students have presented themselves or others to guidance personnel after all of our presentations, asking for help. And he says talking to the students is helping them.

"It's cathartic. We have to prepare for it, and we talk through that and that's been very healthy for us. We didn't choose this mission, this mission chose us."

[Alffe]

http://www.yellowribbon.org/index.html

This wonderful program was started in early 1994 by the Emme's, after their son killed himself. I heard them speak at IUSB and still have the card they passed out. The program has evolved over the years and is now more about prevention than about the people left behind after a suicide.

The Sherbuns spoke three times recently (October) at a couple of our high schools and the response is always wonderful...the students attending these programs respond in ways that fill you with gratitude. The school counselors report that their offices are filled with kids "talking about it" and asking for help.

As my father always said, "Nothing succeeds like success." *grin

[Alffe]

Yesterdays meeting with the Prevention Council...where to begin? I'm so glad I went and I learned so much. They are very active, very low on funds (like everyone in this economy) and always looking for new ideas.

They are still "putting together" the survey results but said 50 % of those responding were interested in continuing to have a support group and would be interested in leading one. Hooray!!!

I'm going to brainstorm with the chair next week about the how's and where's of this...it seems, as I suspected, that Hospice no longer wants to be involved with a support group so it really will be starting one from scratch.

And I got a "feeling" that there are now a lot of rules and regulations about groups....probably liability "stuff"...I'll learn more next week.

[Alffe]

that's sobering! ~sigh

[Abbie]

Thank you for posting this information!!!

I'm going to send the yellow ribbon link down to an aquaintance down near the big city.... they've had 3 students from the same school commit suicide in the past month...

I wish there was some way that we could get people to reach out....
some way to say... you are not alone... I understand as I've been or I am in your shoes...


Abbie

[mistiis]

I agree Abbie. I am trying to decipher that question myself. I figure if I can figure this out, that question of why people don't reach out, because I have such a hard time doing it myself, then that information can be used to help others. Maybe it needs to be brainstormed. I know there are plenty of people around who could contribute ideas. If we can get them too?? Maybe it could make a real difference. I'm still working on myself, trying to come up with some 'key.' ........

[Alffe]

http://current.com/items/89552503/fl...b_audience.htm

[tamiloo]

Thanks for the story and info, it means a lot when you can see that there is a way to help you heal.

[Abbie]

Originally Posted by Alffe

http://current.com/items/89552503/fl...b_audience.htm

[mistiis]

((((BIG HUGS)))) ..... {{{{Abbie}}}} ...I will try to send you a pm later. It made me very sad too.