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Old 03-07-2009, 09:48 PM #1
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Unhappy My son lost his half brother today

We are in shock, it is devestating all over again. After losing our De, his full sister, now he lost his brother. There were only 9 months between them, the reason my ex and I divorced. He grew up in school with ex's two other boys, but his father did not have a close relationship with our children. Holidays only when they were older my kids would call to go down...if they were available. But the boys always were brothers.

Just before dawn, after a night out, the boy made it less then a mile from his home and hit a tree. My son's sister in law called, but has not called back,
It is just such a heart ache for me to lose these children and to have my son and his father lose two now. There is also a 1 1/2 year old left behind.

I was just beginning to bring myself from deep depresion and now this just made my heart feel like it is being ripped out.

Pray for the family my dear friends,
Di
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Old 03-07-2009, 09:59 PM #2
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oh (((((((DiMarie))))))))) I am so sorry to read this

my heart aches for you and your son and I pray their will be light even in this darkness
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Old 03-07-2009, 10:09 PM #3
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(((DiMarie))) I am so very sorry.
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Old 03-07-2009, 10:43 PM #4
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Oh Di. So much loss. I'm so very sorry to read this. You try to keep strong. We'll be thinking of you.
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Old 03-07-2009, 11:47 PM #5
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Oh, so sorry

Only God knows why this things happen right ??

Praying for you and your family. God Bless.

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Old 03-08-2009, 12:48 AM #6
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I am so very sorry for all the losses you and your family have suffered. (((DiMarie)))
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Old 03-08-2009, 01:29 AM #7
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Oh .... di & family
Prayers and hugs
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Old 03-08-2009, 04:07 AM #8
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Thank you so much, eberyone of you are so dear,
I know he was not my natural son, but he was my childrens brother and my heartaches for my son and for their family so much. It is late at night, early morning now and I can not sleep. I know this child is not in his bed and has been gone now for 24 hours in heavan.





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Those that know me, know for the last 2 years since my dd passing I have not been the old me. I try, but a part of me is missing. I guess the loss is bringing up the emotional toll of missing DeAnne and my son losing his brother now. I am so shaken I do not want to sleep that something may happen.

I have been difficult two years for my family too. We never leave the house unless we have to. Then it is put off and find excuses. I need a safe person to watch for me on each end of the route. It has to be local, or my dh has to drive me. My son has not worked since his sister passed he is in therapy. dd fights therapy, we are thinking of a companion service dog, but I have all of de's cats here. Samson and Dehliah would never accept a doggy. Momma Scarlet keeps wandering off down to the trailer where De lived. Last Spring she was Mothering baby ground hogs under it.

My youngest dd is online homeschooled but will rarely go out. No friends, no roller skating She was in a photo club with me and went to the 1 year anniversary dinner two weeks ago. But wanted to go right home. She is convinced she has a cancer, that a light outside or helicopter is Aliens, she freaks at shapes of shadows, I have to sleep with her in the livingroom as she can not stand to be conered in her bedroom. She is now a grownup beautiful 13 year old with below the waist length hair.
But she can not even let a dentist LOOK in her mouth with out fright or flight kicking in ripping off the dental bib and lunging off the chair. Will not take any medication but Childrens Tylenol, is just getting over Shingels...

If any of the kids go out they all have prepaid cell phones or are on my plan and have to call when they get there. If they are longer then they should I have a panic attack and am calling. They have to call that they are awake in the mornings, and Ok and if traveling back, on the way home.

My son was going down his fathers bar on a dart league once a week and I would not allow him to drive if he had a drink it was less then a mile away I would pick him up.

My hair has turned so gray I need to dye it 2 shades darker or it looks white and ages me.
I don't post like I did, I lost control of the clutter with so much going on.
I was just getting to the point of doing 15 minutes a day of tossing, sorting and pick up. I don't want to lose that, but I wish I could wake from this nightmare and concern that something is going to keep happening to the kids, dh or me.
I can see my therapist this week, but I have been laid off for 8 months, dh plant filed bankruptcy, so the copays are killing me.

I am so sorry to whine and cry away like this, but when will it end? I am terrified, sad and scared.
My DeAnne has him with her in heaven, but they should be here with us. We should be going before them. I guess it is opening the wounds again I try so hard to hide.
Thanks for being my friends, Keep us in your prayers
Di
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Old 03-08-2009, 05:05 AM #9
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You're not whining at all, Di. Please don't feel that way.

It sounds as if there's been an awful lot going on that any or many of us wouldn't have known about. I'm so truly sorry that it's been so difficult in so many ways in your life. You hold on there. I know it's hard but you just hold on there for dear life and keep talking.

It might help you heal some from what's happened in the past and might be a lifeline for the present time. You're cared about very much here and as I said once before, you may not even know some of us very well, but we (I) know you and sadly grief brought us to say it, but believe me you were cared about long before then.

Have you all been involved with any family therapy or counselling at all? There has been so much happen and perhaps that might help some. It sounds as if many of you need some help to deal with all the sorrow.

Di, you hold on there please. Keep talking and do know that people from far away are thinking of you.

Love,
Lara
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Old 03-08-2009, 08:50 AM #10
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I'm so sorry to read this Di....Lara is right...you are much loved around here. Sending you positive thoughts for peace in your life.
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