Hi Donna:

No problem. Love to do this. I started "reaching out", when my son became so soul-less, so unempathetic (addicted to video gaming to an extreme degree), and nothing we could do would reach him. So I gather because I could not mother my own son, I was determined to be a better person and reach out to anyone who needed a hug, who is depressed or who needs an ear. It's like I'm giving back to the universe what my son has taken from it. It helps me be a better individual.

Let me tell you something really interesting that happened yesterday. I was walking back from breakfast and I noticed there was a young man walking in front of me. I recognized him immediately. I have lived here for 20 years and everyone knows everyone. But this young man, well he has had his share of difficulties. No one actually knew what he was diagnosed with. About 15 years ago (he was about 10 at the time), he had run out of his house screaming. I was walking to the store with my son and we both jumped out of our skins. I said "oh m god, what is happening to this boy?" and my son had said "he's nuts". I said "no he's not nuts, something IS wrong"!!

So he just stood there across the street screaming his head off. We continued to walk because he suddenly stopped and walked back into his house.

Well, many times after that, as I walked down the block (across the street from where this boy lived), he would run out of the house, start screaming and then run back in.

Of course he became the talk of the block because of his behavior. Turns out he had a brother one year older who was perfectly fine.

So the years would pass and many of us would sit on the porches of our neighbors and this kid would pass and people would whisper "you know, he went away for a bit". I once asked "where did he go". and we found out he was in an upstate juvenile facility.

So one day about 8 years ago, he passed, I said "hi, come up on the porch", and he came up. Since we all knew him "just to say hi", he just came up and we said "how is it going?" and he said "not very good, I was upstate and they would have us in lock up, and I couldn't do anything". I said "was it a school?" and he said "yeah, I went to school upstate" I gather he was in a facility for kids with behavioral problems.

So we would see him from time to time and really not know what was up with him.

So......yesterday he was walking ahead of me. I had the opportunity to reach out and I took it. Wow, did I learn things.!!!

I said "hold up, young man, how are you doing?" It was like a flood opened up, he just needed to talk. He said "I am not happy". I said 'why, what's going on?" He said "my boss and co-workers are mean to me?" I said in my mind: "Oh this kid has a job" I said "oh?? where do you work?" and he said "I work for FedCap." Not sure what that is but I think they place people who are on SSI. I said "so why are you unhappy today?" and he responds:

"Well, I just bought 9 lottery tickets for $10 each and there was no winner, I'm going to sue them". I just looked at him and I said "you did WHAT?"

He said "you would think that in 9 tickets for $10 each (the guy was very articulate by the way), you would think I would get ONE winner"

I composed myself and said "let me get this straight, you just spent $90 on lottery tickets all at once?? and he said "oh I do this all the time, I spend my money on lottery tickets"

I said 'you do realize that you are gambling and you can't sue anyone over this, don't you:"

He said "oh, I know it's gambling but I'm bored and I wanted to win but really, 9 tickets and no winner, c'mon, somethings not right here"

I then said "you mean you bought 9 tickets off of a roll of tickets and the guy just pulled 9 tickets ($10 each), and you separated the tickets and you didn't win ANYTHING??"

And he said "that's right, something is crooked and I should have won SOMETHING?"

I said "Well, actually you should not have blown $90 on lottery tickets but that is another discussion entirely, WHY ON EARTH ARE SPENDING ALL YOUR MONEY ON LOTTERY TICKETS?"

He said "Well, no one listens to me, I'm in therapy, I talk about everything but no one helps me, no one listens, my father is an alcoholic and my brother yells at me, EVERYBODY YELLS AT ME" Seems his mother just lives there and does nothing.

So I just listened (we were standing on the corner) and I let him vent. He was very frustrated. I calmly and carefully explained about how gambling is not productive and he can find other ways of spending that $90 and I knew he was not going to listen to me but he seemed to want to talk and have a conversation. I told him to go to his next therapy session and ask the therapist about his gambling and maybe the therapist can help him make better choices.

I then said "If you don't mind my asking, have you ever been evaluated by any psychiatrist or professional?" He's 25 by the way. He was very forthcoming.

He said "oh yes, I have depression and I get bored" I just nodded, patted him on the shoulder and said "Listen hon, all I did was listen to you and let you get out your frustrations". Go and talk to your therapist and see how it goes."

I know there is nothing I can do but listen, and pat him on the shoulder but this is more than anyone in his family is doing.

So that's what I do. If I see a soul that needs comforting ...I comfort.

There are SO man souls like him. So many frustrating young people. I watched the Oprah show the other day with the 10 year old who tried to kill his mother when he was 7. The rages in that kid, oh my!!!!

So sad

Melody