[Roman]

I am basically asking why Brina Siegel said back in 1997 that I am one of the mildest 0.5% of cases given that in practice I am tne only person with Asperger who doesn't know anyone at all, not even their names, doesn't know how to start or continue a conversation, doesn't know how to do small talk, and has very difficult time finding a date online (which is the only option). I guess you guys probably know me very well, however, I think I should give you some background info about my childhood and adult history, see here: http://www.wrongplanet.net/asperger....wtopic&t=16842

[Milivica]

Ok, here's my opinion.

This question cannot be answered, it is relative.

IF you could round up every aspie on the planet and IF there was a means to accurately 'measure' aspergers, then you could determine your percentage of mildness or severeness currently.

Since the above won't happen, I would calculate in this way. The mildness or severity of your aspergers is relative to the joy/pain it causes you, causes those that love you, those you love, and those around you.

Using that calculation, I would have to estimate you in the severe range based soley on your posts here for the last 5-6 years.

However, your core deficits are exactly the same, as for all others on the spectrum, albeit to greater or lesser degrees. Unfortunately, even though you are aspie, you have a poor definition of what aspergers/autism is, which is why the idea that rocking or not for instance, has anything to do with high or low functioning. Autism Spectrum Disorder, is measured by 'professionals' who look at behaviors. That's not at all accurate. When you were 5, the greatest possible delay you could have had, was 5 years. If your delay were currently 5 years, I'd say, "wow, so what!". If Brina was correct then, or wrong then, it's of no importance now, consider that evaluation nul and void. As the asd child grows along side the nt child, so will the gap between them. In that sense, although the severity of the aspergers doesn't grow, since the gap does, it would appear the aspergers 'worsened'. So, in that way, both you (currently) and she (back then) could be correct.

You were right about you not getting enough practice with the whole social thing, nt's are continually practicing - from the time they get up till the time they go to sleep. It's a lot of work, far and above the 35-40 hours of intensive aba some kids get. Sometimes being nt is fun, but it's mega learning and not necessarily an easier or better life. Because, that too is relative to the particular nt, to the joy/pain being nt causes them, those that love them, those they love, and those around them.

You have all the same 'equipment' as an nt. Or at least enough of it to not have aspergers, but you don't have the 'connections'. To me, that is what autism or aspergers is, the lack of connection...not the lack of equipment. Like a house with a great fuse box, and wiring missing from the box to a couple of the sockets.

I hope you'll look into the RDI I mentioned to you long ago. Or, you can continue endless questions that, even if all answered, really get you no further towards happiness.

For reasons I'm not even sure of, I feel close to you, very much so...not cause of my son, not cause I have aspergers too. I guess cause I believe I can see this incredible level of pain, incompetence, isolation, failure and blame and so many other things you feel, that are so crushing to your spirit. And really, none of that is your fault. Yet, I feel frustrated when you are not at proactive as I'd like to see you.

If you want to look at the www.rdiconnect.com site, and discuss core deficits and how you relate to what you're reading there, I'll be glad to sort it out with you. But you're not broken or flawed or whatnot, you might be a few wires short, but geez so what, who isn't? You are living in a time, that there is much more help than any other time - not easy to find, not easy to...well just not easy! I know. But not as hard as not having opportunity.

Well, that's it. Way longer than I meant to post...so what else is new, all my posts are monsters.

But I don't want to talk further about my opinions here, I can't prove or disprove anything I've said. It's just my opinion, and it's very frustrating to me when I have to validate or debate or discuss to death with you cause I do it all day with Vince. So that kind of poops me out for others.

Take Care!
I wish you all my best!
Mili

[Milivica]

Woops...forgot to add

when I said you have a poor idea of what aspergers/autism really is. I believe I also have a poor idea of what it is. I know how it feels for me, have a great idea of how it feels for my son too...yet...I find it very hard to really really define. To others, and to myself. On individual traits, I'm crystal clear, try to put it all together, and I feel muddled and unclear.

Anyhow, that sounded real snooty...I think at least 99% of the world weather nt or asd has trouble truely grasping asd in terms of a FULL definition.

[Milivica]

Oh sure GL....I spend an hour trying to qualify the man's severity, and you tell me I'm not qualified to...

Well, hmph, you're not qualified to disqualify me

Hee hee,
Mili

[Bobbi]

I'm sorry, but I have been dx'd with AS and I don't understand this "poll." As someone else said, it's all relative or subjective.

Who's worse off than whom? What's it about? It feels like one-up-manship - akin to whose pain is worse.

I see there is a link that I can read more about why this "poll" was created, but the fact that it was just leaves me feeling: Why so when people here are being led to another site outside this one? I'd take it up whatever issues brought about at that other site and not seek to enlist others.

Peace

... and, I'm sorry but I do not like "polls" such as these in support forums.

[Roman]

Originally Posted by Milivica

Unfortunately, even though you are aspie, you have a poor definition of what aspergers/autism is, which is why the idea that rocking or not for instance, has anything to do with high or low functioning.

I am not sure what are you referring to.

Originally Posted by Milivica

Autism Spectrum Disorder, is measured by 'professionals' who look at behaviors. That's not at all accurate. When you were 5, the greatest possible delay you could have had, was 5 years. If your delay were currently 5 years, I'd say, "wow, so what!". If Brina was correct then, or wrong then, it's of no importance now, consider that evaluation nul and void.

You misunderstood. Brina evaluated me when I was 17, not 5. You probably confused three separate things

1)At 5 I was diagnosed with a question mark
2)At 15 was my first official diagnosis
3)At 17 I came to Brina who evaluated me as very mild

Originally Posted by Milivica

You have all the same 'equipment' as an nt. Or at least enough of it to not have aspergers, but you don't have the 'connections'.

But this implies that Asperger is due to things like bad parention which was refutted few decades ago.

[Roman]

Originally Posted by Bobbi

I'm sorry, but I have been dx'd with AS and I don't understand this "poll." As someone else said, it's all relative or subjective.

Who's worse off than whom? What's it about? It feels like one-up-manship - akin to whose pain is worse

Okay for one thing I haven't met too many aspies other than myself, so I might need other people's help to do all the comparisons

Originally Posted by Bobbi

I see there is a link that I can read more about why this "poll" was created, but the fact that it was just leaves me feeling: Why so when people here are being led to another site outside this one? I'd take it up whatever issues brought about at that other site and not seek to enlist others..

It has nothing to do with anything that went on at another site. The only reason I made link to another site is that I didn't want to write the same thing twice. Of course I could have cut and pasted it, but I figured that by having a link you guys will benefit out of responses that I will get at another site.

Originally Posted by Bobbi

... and, I'm sorry but I do not like "polls" such as these in support forums.

The purpose of the poll IS about support. I feel frustrated that I seem to be more severe than other aspies despite the fact that i have to be milder. So, I am seeking "support".

[Milivica]

Originally Posted by Roman

You misunderstood. Brina evaluated me when I was 17, not 5. You probably confused three separate things

1)At 5 I was diagnosed with a question mark
2)At 15 was my first official diagnosis
3)At 17 I came to Brina who evaluated me as very mild

Ohhhh, yes you're right I did misunderstand. Gotcha now. Well, that was still a very long time ago...a decade? Even if it were a week ago, I think you are correct to question the dx. I mean, you seem to doubt the 'mildness' factor - I'd believe your self evaluation over Brina's. Also, maybe your environment has a lot to do with how you feel about things...IF as you look around, you see everyone has what you want most, (friendships/relationships) but can't seem to get. When in school, it felt to me like everyone in the world had someone, except me. It made having aspergers harder for me to be around such a social setting. (But I'm totally not saying leave school.)

And I totally didn't mean bad parenting - just bad wiring, literally. Neurological wiring or pathways I mean, not your house.

Again, take care!
Mili

[autisticmoose2]

as i always do. that the association of severity is not relative to what someone else says. one (meaning you) would have to compound the given activities and thoughts into a daily log of sort. i utilize poetry for such logs but i imagine that others would use what ever logic directly pertains to themselves.

after such logs are created of thoughts and activities one can go over the results and identify which parts of your life can associate directly to autistic spectrum traits. while accounting for the fact that you have high social inadequacies (that's spelled wrong!) one would want to take into account how many social situations you are around. what size town or city do you live in? do you live by yourself? what are social situations at work like?

me personaly i shake excessively during social situations and i seem to llok at my surroundings a lot, to the point of low eye contact with the person i am conversing with.

try identifying basic needs that you can relate throughout your day. seems i have found i am an inventor of sort or nature just due to the constant reverse engineering techniques my mind lays before me. but also my autistic patterns seem to stimulate my thoughts in wierd ways. but fun, but wierd. i like making poetry about my autistic like traits and using my poetry to help identify my own personal boundries. while the resiprodal i am on seems to help a ton!!!!!!!! i use my poetry like a mirror to reflect how i view myself. it helps a lot for setting goals and aspirations to look forward to.

i say treat this board and other online information as a guide. not to tell you how autistic you are or are not. but to be used by identifying that these are more traits of autism that other people have noticed. you don't have to have all the traits for autism to control your life and your mind. and at the same time i must mention about RDI. for the little i know about it has helped me in such quadratic ways. RDI is a usefull thing to look up and read about. they seem to identify a bulk of knowledge and information that can help anyone on the spectrum (even just a little bit).

as with anything i do i am not sure if this is useful or not. it is basically how i deal with my asperger's. i have never been rated on a scale but i have been diagnosed. my latest perscription try worked great and helped me a lot. but there is much i must over come with time.


Autistic Moose