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11-21-2009, 12:53 PM | #1 | |||
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Legendary
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Hi guys.
Start of this month (20 days ago) i started tapering my benzo. it is pretty potent but subbing with diazepam (Valium) first is problematic since the equivalence is not well-established, and diazepam's characteristics are also a little different. However, this benzo is about as long acting as diazepam, and it is available in drops, so one can take/reduce by miniscule doses, for a safely proportioned taper. i made a taper plan following Ashton Manual guidelines (5-10% every 1-2 weeks varying with individual needs / reactions / stress / etc). i do adjust it as needed. I have also decreased caffeine. I have not had any real problems except for some light sleep and a little agitation which passed however. Other than that, i have had a little "postive" activation in the sense i get more stuff done! I had the 4th dose decrease (there are countless more) a couple days ago. Today, i woke up where everything bothered the living shtt out of me. my mom singing. the sound of a cell phone being turned on. the tinkling/banging of a metal spoon on a glass jar (that would bother me if i was about to have a migraine, only it wasn't bothering my ears, but my NERVES). AARRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHH. BUT also......... i am trying to get some docs together that have to observe a bunch of tech specs. i have been busy hunting on the internet all day for a shop that can scan the stuff i need... where they or i have adequate control of the scanning parameters. i know of one but i was hoping for something closer. GRRR. Yesterday i was busy all day mucking with stuff to see if i had already some suitable stuff on hand. i don't. i even ventured down into the basement (big big big deal for me!!! like i'm alive! wow!) and dug through boxes looking for some software i couldn't find GRRR. i think that contributed to my GRRR. found some other stuff though. STILL, it is WEIRD. the past 2 nights i've slept like a log, 7-8 hours straight... clean through parents taking up the blinds this morning - which is LOUD! an hour later i wake up a jangled up everything's-a-needle-in-the-brain claw and fangs queen? hello???? i was not "agitated" per se, today, btw and hadn't even had coffee yet when the cell phone bugged me!!!! ok, anyone think the benzo level has gone way outta whack somehow??? or do you think it is stress from the stuff i'd doing against a deadline too, more than the benzo? or both? or other? thoughts? ~ waves ~ Last edited by waves; 11-21-2009 at 03:42 PM. Reason: tried to shorten |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Brokenfriend (11-21-2009) |
11-21-2009, 07:00 PM | #2 | |||
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Wisest Elder Ever
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could be both
although you are tapering really slowly so that is good. I think it was the increased stress. You aee a sensitive woman and maybe your senses are more accute? anyway to make a place for yourself in the basement????? privacy! bizi
__________________
. Hattie the black and white one wrestling with hazel, calico. lost hattie to cancer..... Happiness is a decision.... 150mg of lamictal 2x a day haldol 5mg 2x a day 1mg of cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night I will not give up in this weight loss journey, nor this need to be AF. 3-19-13=156, 6-7-13=139, 8-19-13=149, 11-12-13=140, 6-28-14=157, 7-24-14=149, 9-24-14=144, 1-12-15=164, 2-28-15=149, 4-21-15=143, 6-26-15=138.5, 7-22-15=146, 8-24-15=151, 9-15-15=145, 11-1-15=137, 11-29-15=143, 1-4-16=152, 1-26-16=144, 2-24-16=150, 8-15-16=163, 1-4-17=169, 9-20-17=174, 11-17-17=185.6, 3-22-18=167.9, 8-31-18= 176.3, 3-6-19=190.8 5-30-20=176, 1-4-21=202, 10-4-21= 200.8,12-10-21=186, 3-26-22=180.3, 7-30-22=188, 10-15-22=180.9, |
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"Thanks for this!" says: |
11-21-2009, 07:29 PM | #3 | |||
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Legendary
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Dear Waves, One guess is that you woke up feeling this way, so it was not the activity of the day, although the activities you describe sound like a problem for certain days. If this is close to Valium's half life, then you might have been near the four day mark of the half life (and these half lives vary considerable from person to person (if I remember right about how this works). Also, you say you are reducing by 5%-10%. Maybe some of the cuts / tapers are going to need 5% rather than 10%. And maybe sometimes the cuts need to be further apart than the 1-2 weeks suggested. If this cut was hard, then maybe go 3 weeks until the next one. Some thoughts: Any chance that you would benefit from dosing twice a day instead of once a day? Perhaps you already do that. The internet instructions (consensus?) are to stay at a decrease once you have made the decrease. But go by what your body mind is telling you. You can go back up to the last dose and sit there awhile if you need to. There are some meds that might be able to help you according to this abstract: http://journals.lww.com/psychopharma...tinuing.3.aspx Quote:
It's hard to assess against the day you had. So wait one or two more days to decide if it was the cut that caused the day. Here's what my pdoc did when I messed up a Xanax taper (without checking with him first): He put me on higher my original starting dose for four days. . . . . not saying you will need to do that. . . . just showing you how my pdoc handled it. You'll have to see how you feel tomorrow to know what happened today. M. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: |
11-21-2009, 07:49 PM | #4 | |||
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Legendary
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i very much value your input. hee hee... basement for privacy... i have thought of that more than you would believe. what i meant by basement though, is the garage. and what is in the garage, is my boxed up stuff, and a lot of dust! lol. NONETHELESS! i HAVE thought of it, which is pretty wild! (hey, there is a light in there ... no heat tho! ) definitely today senses more acute... or less of a senses-to-brain filter in place. it did get better as the day went along though. this morning i was asked to do dishes and had planned to go out and wanted to do neither. i forced myself to do the dishes and focused really hard on the water and suds on my hands and stuff... i think that is called increasing "mindfulness." then i plowed on with the stuff from yesterday, which got me more frustrated, but also distracted from the "general ARGGGHH" feeling i had waking up. i was nicer to my parents. i felt good about doing stuff. i didn't get the results i wanted but even "eliminating options" means at least the path of what to do next is clearer. i feel better/calmer now. hopefully the stress was a major contributor - yesterday i got really frustrated with not finding the software i needed and then not being able to install some other stuff... the up side is i'm actually DOING STUFF which is flippin' amazing! we'll see what tomorrow brings... i have to get out and go to a little shop in town to see if they have a scanner. they also sell cigarettes so they might be open sunday. when my wallet got stolen, i lost their business card, so i couldn't call today to find out. ~ waves ~ |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | bizi (11-21-2009), Brokenfriend (11-21-2009), Dmom3005 (11-22-2009), Isis (11-22-2009), Mari (11-21-2009) |
11-21-2009, 08:03 PM | #5 | |||
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Elder
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It's hard to tell. I've been through things like that,and sometimes it's impossible to time,or know what to do.
I decided to slowly withdraw from Xanax years ago,and I did it very,very slowly over a long period of time,in which I felt comfortable to do it. After about four months I was down to a tiny piece. My anxiety kicked back in slowly,and then hit me real hard. I was out of town,and when I got home,I felt like I was having a heart attack. My friends drove me to my parents house. My parents called my Pdoc,and he put me on a strong dose of Xanax,and the pain went away,and I felt better. Unfortunately I had panic attacks for several months. My parents let me stay there for six months. It was a awful experience. Everyone around me didn't know what to do,or say. I had obsessions also that where increasing. I made a mistake in trying to get off of my medication. I was filled with emotion about it. Please be careful. I don't want you to go through what I went through. BF |
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11-21-2009, 09:58 PM | #6 | |||
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Legendary
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Dear Mari & Steve,
thank you both for your posts... much food for thought. i was in the middle of replying to you Mari but got a chance to chat with someone live... so did that. and now it's 4am... past my imaginary bedtime... lol. anyway, i will answer you both tomorrow! ~ waves ~ whose eyelids are drooping |
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"Thanks for this!" says: |
11-21-2009, 11:14 PM | #7 | |||
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Legendary
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"Thanks for this!" says: |
11-22-2009, 12:12 PM | #8 | ||||||||
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Legendary
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Dear Mari,
First, thank you for all your thoughts and suggestions and persepectives! Lots to chew on... wow. Quote:
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hmmm.... Anyway, I appreciate you sharing all this and will keep ALL of it in mind. what is even somewhat working now may not necessarily later, so it is good to have all your suggestions. ~ waves ~ |
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"Thanks for this!" says: |
11-22-2009, 01:57 PM | #9 | |||||
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Legendary
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I met a guy who was being detoxed from Xanax when i was in the clinic and he too was in pretty bad shape. Quote:
Luckily what i am on is not quite as difficult as Xanax... even though it is pretty potent, it is also very very long acting (Xanax is very very short acting). Also, its availability in drops makes it so you can cut back by a tiny proportion at a time. Quote:
~ waves ~ |
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"Thanks for this!" says: |
11-23-2009, 10:15 AM | #10 | |||
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Legendary
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doing much better today nerves-wise. i think what is also happening is, recently, my sleep wrapped around and i have been waking up about the same time as the parents, or after them. more often, i am awake long before they are, or i wake up after they have gone out.
the thing is, when i wake up i like to have peace and quiet for a while. that has always been the case - normal for me. like i can watch tv and stuff but i will have it on a really low volume - which i can hear well, provided no ambient noises interfere. or if i listen to music, it has to be pretty soft, gentle music, in the morning, and low volume. NO THRASH METAL!!! the parents are like, from full off, to full on. so, if they are here and awake or waking, when i am waking up, no peace and quiet during the time i am still coming to grips with my senses. anyway. problem today is can't get butt in gear to get the stuff i need done. and i'm worrying about it too. i keep trying to argue myself out the door, but it isn't working. this is part of my action block and i don't know what that is about. i know lately it has been less, but today is not one of those days. i have decided to can my exploratory mission to the little shop here, and go straight to the one in the city as i have to go half way there anyway, just to get another thing done. the cost is not much more. i would still have time to get ready and catch the next bus... i think that would be in time to make it back for dinner and not get people mad. but i have sub-zero inclination. i will shoot for tomorrow i guess. i can't remember if the shop in the city is open all day or if they close in the middle. here things close for like 2-3 hours. i think they close. maybe i can find their phone number and call to get their hours. that would at least be something.... thank you all for listening.... ~ waves ~ who is stuffing her face |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Brokenfriend (11-24-2009) |
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