I live with my significant other, Lee. We first got together in 1982, seperated in 88, got back together 92.

He has three sons Steven 33 lives in MO. Tony 31 married with one son,age 9, lives 9 blocks away but they lived with us for 8 years until 3 years ago. Joshua age 29 with 2 sons aged 2 almost 3 and 4. He is going through a divorce and custody of the kids at the moment and they are back living with us.

I have two children aged 17 and 15 a boy, Richard, and a girl, Danielle. During the seperation part. We'd had a big fight over he couldn't have anymore children and he couldn't take how I looked when I saw babies. Silly now, but I wouldn't have my two kids if we hadn't.

Joshua and his wife, Bonnie, have either lived with us or one of her relatives since they got married 5 years ago. They have only ever lived on their own together for a couple of months here and there. Due to her compulsive spending they would either be evicted or have the utilites shut off.

We were hoping that this last time they were finally going to be able to be self sufficient. She had a really good job bringing in enough to cover all the bills. Plus her child support for her daughter. Joshua stays home with the kids now due to his heart(which are trying to him on disability for).

Talk about a compulsive lier(sp). One right after the other. She's been dx'd bipolar and still trying to get her on the right meds. Joshua is also dx'd bipolar as is Lee, but neither of them is as bad as she is.

She has put that boy through hell and is still trying to. Anything to get her way. She's drawn up divorce papers herself she wants him to put through legal aid giving him custody of the kids without her paying child support. Legal aid says no way.

Anyway she has kept this household in an uproar since the day she entered the family. Starting fights between everyone and all kinds of things.

She's told everyone where she used to work that Joshua beat her(he's never raised his hand to her). She's the controlling one and he's the one that has been abused. She'd drop something and she'd wait for him to pick it up for her even if he was taking care of the kids at the time. He'd have to drop whatever he was doing or incurr her wrath.

She wasn't much of mother, he did all the night feedings and changings even when he was the one working and she was the one at home. She'd wake him up to do it. I saw her more than once since they were staying in my living room. I'd be getting up to tend the baby as I couldn't hear anyone up with the poor screaming little thing. Get halfway down the hall and she'd be shaking him awake to take care of the baby knowing he had to be at work in a couple of hours. She could take a nap during the day and frequently did if she couldn't get enough sleep at night he couldn't. He worked 10 hour shifts. Until his heart made him pass out at work, we were lucky he didn't die on us the dr told us. That is usually the first and only sign someone with his type of heart condition has.

She told us he hit her when they were up at his brother's house up the street and Tony had to pull Joshua off of her. When they got back from their house. She told them while they were up there that Lee had to pull Joshua off of her down here before they went up there. Neither incident happened.

She was full of this kind of stuff. Her mother says she's been like this since she was 15. Her ex-husband, Bonnie's father, was like that. Says he's been in things like the CIA and stuff and hasn't ever. She couldn't take it anymore and left him.

Bonnie started staying with friends in town near her work as with as far as we are from her work and with the gas prices and sometimes closing then opening, it made more sense to stay with them.

She started spinning tales of couple swapping and wild parties where she was staying, they are friends of ours as well and it wasn't happening. Parties yes, a little wild yes, but everything she was saying no.

She told them we kicked her out. She told us she was leaving Joshua and moved her stuff out. She had a thing for the husband of the couple she was staying with. He was her co-worker and boss. Even if he wasn't, he wasn't interested. But she thinks she's all that and she isn't.

Anyway she got transferred to another store in the town south of here she was 3 towns north of us. Closer to here but she was staying in a motel down there. Tried to "reconcile" when she ran out of money for the hotel. We said no to her coming back here. So she found other friends.

About this time she was telling her mom about someone she'd met. She had also taken her daughter to live at her mom's when she left here. Her mom won't let her move in with her.(gee wonder why). So we think she was already seeing the guy she is with now.

Now she can't understand why we won't let her take the children for visitation. Maybe you all can make me understand why she can't. SHE IS LIVING WITH A REGISTERED SEX OFFENDER! He is on parole for 5 years for molesting his 6 year old daughter. We saw legal aid and were advised that according to his restrictions not to let her take them anywhere near him or to have him anywhere near our home. We risk not only losing the two boys but my daughter and my son to foster care plus him to prison. Us in jail as well.

They got a place together right before Thanksgiving. They can't deny it as the address she gave us for her is the one that is listed for him online.

One of her sister-in-laws ran his profile to find out some more about him is how we found out about all this. Her mom took her daughter to her father. He filed papers which will soon be served to her granting her mom shared custody of the daughter with him and cutting off her custody. She had her daughter spend the night Thanksgiving before we found all this out.

She has tried to convince us that she is taking some kind of classes to be able to suporvise his visits. But I've checked with friends that are police officers, and the legal aid attorney and there are no such classes.

Enough about that aspect of last year. I had a last litter of puppies from my toy poodle puppy Feb 13. Had a little trouble getting them all homes but finally got them all in good homes. We had lost the daddy before Christmas due to someone unwiring our front gate and the street outfront is also a highway.

I lost the mommy a few months ago. She had bitten through an electrical cord and we'd been nursing her through that, but there was too much internal damage. We cannot figure out how she got to the cord. We have everything so the babies can't get to them so she shouldn't have been able to either.

I had just gotten my first horse. I've always loved horses, my mom couldn't understand my wanting to collect the figurines so I wasn't allowed to. I've been riding at a friend's and though still a beginner, been doing very well. Lee has alway had a horse until recently. Another friend of ours raises arabs and with the drought here was cutting back on her herd. I have Sajera as long as I can feed her or I can send her back or make payments on her when I can.

We had gotten another horse the same way at the same time named Destiny, but Lee didn't bond with her and we sent her back. She also started charging the fence and biting so we opted to send her back and keep another horse for her for awhile, she was not buyable. Meanwhile, our neighbor(we have pasture on two sides of us with 30 head of horses) had a yearling that needed fed up.

She wasn't doing well for her and could we take her, keep her with mine and we could keep her forever no money just feed her. She was doing really well, putting weight back on and my horse mothering her. She went down one day and was gone by the next morning. The vet said it was West Nile. We had already vaccinated Sajera for it thank god. Suzy was ill when she was brought and none of knew until she lost alot of weight very quickly. I had to have her owner come get her as the police here said I couldn't keep a sick horse in town. (the pasture is not in town but we are).

Sajera got a light case of strangles. Which is what Suzy had. Suzy died of the case she got. She already had complications from it when she arrived, but none of knew it. We thought she had a growth on her chest from an old injury and it could be cancerous or not. It was full of infection and burst but that is a complication of strangles when it isn't near the throat latch or cheek. Suzy had knots all over and purpura. I am so sorry for Suzy that we didn't catch it in time. And so glad that Sajera only had a light case of it.

Our friend with the horses, had her mom come for a surprise visit for the holidays. They were not planning on decorating for the holidays and were in the middle of remodeling their home. So we went over to help clean up all the plaster mess and put furniture back where it went etc. before her mom came. And that is how Teddy entered our lives.

Teddy is a long coat chihuahua and shitzu mix. He is black, has white tips on all 4 feet. He has the **** zu coat, chihuahua nose, and size of the chihuahua. He is addorable and has stolen everyone's heart. It took longer with our boston terrier Xena, but she's finally been won over.

We have Caramel, a poodle pup from a previous litter to this year's and belongs to my daughter. We have Xena a Boston Bull Terrier and the grande dame of the house she's almost ten. The best dog we could ever have gotten.

We have turtles, birds, fish, and I have an albino corn snake named Slither. We have one rooster named Roger and he's our guard rooster, he's part bannie very pretty and he barks likes the dogs. He shares his meals with Sajera, I so need a picture of the two of them eating together.

Our golden retriever went to live with Tony and our grandson. They have Mocha from our first poodle litter and my manx cat I couldn't keep due to Lee's allergies to cats. Thank god not dogs. They were given a golden retriever pup for christmas so now Willow has a puppy by proxy. (we had her fixed years ago). They were also given a black manx kitten so now my cat has a kitten by proxy as well. ha ha.

Somedays the animals are the only thing I get out of bed for, and Sajera the only thing I get dressed for. Can't go take care of her in my nightie

I have scoliosis and two compression fractures, so I am in constant pain. Can't walk or stand for long nor sit either. On horse back I'm free. Getting there is another thing. I'm working with Sajera to be able to have something next to her for me to mount from. My friend has a carriage horse that either of us has also ridden and an old cow horse that are trained to be lead up to a picknick table and we mount from the table. I think Sajera is short enough I can use a bucket. (Julie is 17 hands, I'm 5'3 and her back is as tall as I am in my boots).

I have arthritis in my back as well everything affects my arms and legs, they feel weak and I sometimes drop things because I can't feel them. I never know when I will lose feeling and it comes and goes very fast sometimes or lasts days.

If you remember me from the other board, I was in the process of getting a new home built through a grant for low income and disabled people.

We have been in the new house for our 3rd Christmas. First Christmas was great, no adult kids or grandkids living with us, we could spoil them rotten and send them home. A month later and we have 5 more people living in our living room. The new house is alot smaller than the old one was, we miss it even though it was falling apart and hard to heat or cool. The room, the light and the breeze with the windows open.

My living room and kitchen here are the size of the living room I had at the old house. The bedrooms are half the size and we only have 3 compared to 5. Still only one bathroom. That is rough with this many people.

Anyway, the second christmas we didn't even have room for a tree or decoration. Not with a couch two chairs and a queen sized bed in the living room.

We had a tree this year and everything, even with 3 mattresses on the floor, granted they are crib mattresses, we finally got Joshua a twin mattress so he can say goodbye to the crib one he was on. Amazing how much more fits when ms clothes and shoe horse isn't here.

And the space in the bathroom, little bathroom, but more space without the hundred and one scrubs, facials, shampoos, conditioners, skin treatments etc. she thought she had to have instead of say rent. Over a $1,000 a month comming in and she couldn't help us out with anything not even toilet paper. Her car was filled with empty Starbucks cups and energy drink cans, more makeup and jewelry and clothes for her than anything, but the babies drawers were almost empty and Joshua only had two pairs of pants to his name.

We are trying to get Joshua on disability, foodstamps and whatever else he needs to get on his feet. Depending on what the disability is he is either going to go live with his brother and sister-in-law or get a place of his own. I think he will start out with his brother before he gets the disability comming in as that will take awhile. Maybe not with the bipolar dx with the heart. Lee got his disability sooner with the bipolar added. We'd been years with his neck injury and it was a matter of months when the bipolar dx was added to it.

They need their own bedrooms, and to be a family with just them. Tara and Tony are looking for a place that will give them all their own space and stay within their budget. It will help them with Joshua in the house that they won't need a sitter. We watch their 9 year old(our grandson) when their work schedules make it necessary but they want to move closer to work and we would be unable to help as much with them that far.

It is a half hour drive, but neither Lee nor I could do it everyday. I do the faire but it is only two days a week for 8 weekends. I recoup the rest of the week. And if they didn't make accomodations for me, I couldn't do it. Each year I swear it will be my last because I hurt so much, but I would miss my friends there, and it does pay the taxes.

That is another thing with the new house, I wonder how those people on extreme home makeover do it. Our new house isn't as large or fancy as those and we aren't in a big town (600 people here and I think they count pets in that). My daughter's graduating class will be 12 in 3 years and will be one of the largest they've had. Our's run about $1,000 a year and that's after homestead exemption and disabiltiy exemption. A larger town and a larger house hoooooey it must be quite abit.

Today seems to be a good day even with my late start. Noon and still in pj's. Just got the grandkids down for a nap and I need to get dressed and go take care of Sajera, I can hear her through the closed kitchen window nickering at me about her breakfast.

Told you this would be a long one. Hope you could stay with me. I expect not. My sister can't stay through my short e's to her.

Thanks for letting vent a bit.

Wow...
YOu have been taking care of a lot of people!
I wonder when you are jsut going to have to take care of each other?
and your pets too of course.
I under stand that they are family and all....but....
you have to think of your health...
I am sure this has been very draining on you and the stress must have been unbearable at times.
You sound really mentally healthy...good for you sweetie.
thanks for sharing/posting....
"vent" anytime.
((((HUGS))))
bizi