[BlueMajo]

My dear friends,

This is horrible... Please help me... Im a killer, a murderer... God might be so angry with me right now !!

I feel so bad...

I was in one of this highways we have in my city when I saw a poor dog in the middle.... My mom stoped the car and got down to try to catch him so we could bring him home but he refused to come with mom so we left him and later on we found out a car rolled him over....

My God it was fault... I did nothing !!! Holy GOd this is my fault... He would be alive if I had rescued him... And we tried, but just tried... Nothing more... And my life is always the same... Intentions, intentions... No actions...

I feel so sad, bad... I dont want to go to school

Im sure God hates me now.... I dont know what to do...

[bizi]

You re not amurdereer.
accidents happen and you tried to help remember that. It is not your fault.
please don't blame yourself.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

[BlueMajo]

No Bizi,

Im a bad person.... Now I understand why Im a lonely person... Why good things never happen to me... or even worse, are about to happen but never happen at the end.... like what I did to this poor dog.... I tried, but did nothing....

Im a coward. That's why my life is as it is....

[Brokenfriend]

Hi Blue. First of all,God doesn't hate you. He's not angry with you. He's concerned about you feeling this depressed about this situation that was beyond your control. It sounds like your mother tried,and was not able to bring the dog to the car.

It's sad when a animal dies,but God is more concerned about you. Try to put this pain,and false guilt into God's hands. He made you,and you are special. Your in the palms of his hands.

The grief about the dog that passed away will slowly subside. Now I want you to cheer up. BF

[waves]

Blue...

i don't think there are really good and bad people, but there are people who do a lot of bad things. we can say in shorthand, that is a "bad person." such a person would be one who purposely and intentionally causes harm.

such a person might hunt down a dog to run him down. they would laugh and not try to help the dog. they would feel victorious about the violence. this is called malice.

NONE of your actions involved malice. furthermore after the accident you did your best, to help. you did act!!!

it's not like you left and then were too busy enjoying your chocolate sunday, and said oh well so what. you DID TAKE ACTION. you tried to move the dog and bring him to safety. you did not succeed. i understand that hurts, but you did the best you could in the circumstances. remember, you must also have been in shock about it. after the fact, we often think of 10 more things would could have done or might have said, etc... but that is only after the benefit of a lot of time stewing over it. by which time the dog had died. when he was alive, and you were in a position to intervene, you did what you could. you did whatever you could think of.

if you didn't think of more, and couldn't do more, it's ok. it is still not your fault. that is not malice, or intentional negligence. it is called fallibility. we are fallible. we do not always succeed in our intentions.

we do not control life on this earth. it is given, and it is taken away by powers much greater....

please pray, and tell God how badly you feel, and ask for grace. You may Him to help you be able to intervene more effectively in a similar situation. But in the end... even if you'd got him to a vet, the dog might have died all the same. i am saying, that part... that isn't up to you.

Grieve for the dog. That seems natural. I came across a hurt pigeon a few weeks ago. it let me touch it... there were no visible injuries and yet it was sitting on the ground all through my appointment. when i came out, i stayed with it and warmed it in my hands for some time (it was nearing dusk, and getting quite cold - the bird was all fluffed up). but i knew no vet would look at a pigeon here - they are seen as pests, like rats. i put it in a shallow box and set it atop a big planter - i thought this would be less cold than if it were in contact with the ground. i warmed it some more with my hands, then left him in the corner of the courtyard. it was as though it knew my intent to leave this time. when i removed my hands, it closed his eyes. i was afraid it was going to die. yet i had a feeling whatever was going to happen, was going to happen. i still felt guilty, in case it died alone!

i asked the doorman of the complex to check on him in the morning, as well as another gentleman. i too felt bad... felt like i should have stayed until he either flew away, or died. but it could have been all night. i felt horrible. but it was not reasonable for me to stay there all night. the bird might simply have slept and flown away. that's what they do at night if they are ok - sleep. so, i left.

i think these situations affect us so deeply Blue, because we are very sensitive.

please try to let go of the control you seem to need over the situation... and let it be what it is. you really did your best. i am proud of you. try to feel better.



~ waves ~

[Brokenfriend]

There's a neighbor who has about 10 cats in their yard. I was driving to church one Sunday morning,and one of them where died in the road in front of their house. I was suddenly,and deeply grieved. Our sensitivity can bring us to tears very quickly. BF

[BlueMajo]

I love you all so much.

And you are right, we are so sensitive...

[Ponygirl]

Sweety, please, listen!! If that hadn't happened to him, something
else would've happened! Unfortunately, it was just, his time.
It was *not* your fault and you need to quit beating yourself up!!!

Phyllis

[Lara]

Blue

Have you read this article? If not, try to read it when you get time.
Thinking of you.

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archive...hly-sensitive/
5 Gifts of Being Highly Sensitive
By Therese J. Borchard
Associate Editor

[waves]

Dear Lara,

wow! thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you ..... !!!
(if i could have hit 'Thanks' 50 times to your post i would have! )

this article this article hits the nail right on the head, imho.

Originally Posted by Lara

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archive...hly-sensitive/
5 Gifts of Being Highly Sensitive
By Therese J. Borchard
Associate Editor

Below i've cited the key points and conclusion but i strongly encourage everyone to read the FULL article!!!
it is brief and easy to read.

Question: If you had to name the top five gifts of being highly sensitive, what would they be?

[Douglas Eby's Answer]:

1. Sensory detail
...
2. Nuances in meaning
...
3. Emotional awareness
...
4. Creativity
...
5. Greater empathy
...

Question: And, if you had to name five curses, what would they be? And how best do we overcome them or co-exist with them?

[Douglas Eby's Answer]:

1. Easily overwhelmed, overstimulated
...
2. Affected by emotions of others
...
3. Need lots of space and time to ourselves
...
4. Unhealthy perfectionism
...
5. Living out of sync with our culture
...
But “too emotional” or “too sensitive” are usually criticisms based on majority behavior and standards.

Overall, I think being highly sensitive is a trait we can embrace and use to be more creative and aware. But it demands taking care to live strategically, even outside popular values, to avoid overwhelm so we can better nurture our abilities and creative talents.

boy. i feel like Douglas Eby drew a picture of me at least insofar as strengths, weaknesses, and needs.

~ waves ~