I'm not even sure I want to get into this publically, but, heck, I need a place to let off steam, and I value you ladies and your opinions (guys, too, but not this subject!).

My daughter turned 24 in Jan, and on her 24th BD, she had an accident and totaled our car, if you recall . Things were kind of crazy there for awhille, and all of our minds were a bit shell shocked, so to speak. Long story short, we forgot that my dtr had her OB/GYN appt in Feb to get her depo shot, which lasts 3 months. We didn't even think about it and do the math untill a few weeks ago! Don't ask me how it slipped both of our minds (me and dtr). She went to get a lab test last Fri to make sure she didn't somehow get pregnant, and then went on Wed for her shot. Unbeknoownst to me, she had a gentle man caller over Tuesday night, and even through she had said condoms would always be used, she didn't use one - SIX TIMES ....don't even ask but she's known the guy for a few years, and they see each other sporadically. So she tells her dooc on Wed that she 'might be pregnant' (I can barely get myself to TYPE those words, let alone consider the possibility!!), so the dooc says, we'll wait 10 days, test her again and then have the shot.

Where on earth was my dtr's brain? Maybe calculating, as she always said she loves kids, and doesn't even think she will ever have them. That being said, she has faithfully been going to get her depo shot every 3 mos, until this past screw up (no pun intended!).

My question to you all (if you're still w/ me) is #1) did you girls ever think of doing something this impulsive when you were @ her age?? #2) If she hasn't EVER gotten her period in the past three or four yrs, would there be any possibility of her being pregnant (I would think NOT) and #3) w/ all the meds she takes, what would be the chances of a normal baby, should the worst be true?

Gosh, lunch is over, don't even have time to proofread, thanks for reading if you got this far. I think I would kill myself if she were P - I just couldn't go thru that, NOT w/ her, OMG!!!!!!

Assurances, please - thanks for your candor!

Hugs, Jacquie

Hi Jacquie,

I did dumb things in my youth too, but luckily never got pregnant. It's stupidity I know, but sometimes in the heat of the moment the brain doesn't work as good as it normally would. That's all I can really comment on, because I know it was my untreated BP II that was why I didn't recognize the risks I was taking. I hope things work out that she's not pregnant. If she's taking a lot of meds odds are that she's not really fertile, but she needs another test to be sure, tests should be able to detect it soon if she was, and hopefully things will work out that its a negative result on the test.

I hope that makes you feel better knowing that someone else got through similar circumstances unscathed too. I don't know about how well the baby would turn out, I don't know the answers there, but I hope things work out for you both. Hang in there and stay strong. You can handle it no matter what.

Dear Jacquie,


I was boring and responsible most of the time. And I have never wanted children, not even for a moment.

I would guess that one cannot get pregnant easily without having a period, but a gyn/ob would know more about this.

When someone is on a lot of meds and gets pg, they have to have a few long talks with the pdocs and the ob/gyns. Sometimes the docs like to take the mother off many of the meds. Sometimes they have other recommendations.

Don't worry for now. There is not much that you can do until you see the dr again.

M.

been there jacquie. my oldest. not the one i pm'ed you about. she has a good head on her shoulders.

i now have a 5 yr old grandson..know in these parts as grandmonkey. i have had him most of his life. for his first 8 months...and off an on until he was almost 3 when she dropped him off. we haven't seen her in 2 1/2 yrs. he has no clue who she is when he sees a picture of her.

i can't tell you why they do the dumb things they do. i can say they get the mindset that it will never happen to them.

this will be a long 10 days. but we are here for you. venting and having the support is very important.

i'm not sure about all the side effects on a fetus with her meds. we can help you look that up.

Hi,if you don't mind i'm going to but in here if you do,you asked Iwas married 4 5years at 24,could this of happened to me,i don't know but being married it would of been no problem..But i have 3 children all grown and all married...But i was lucky anything like this could have happened yes to all of us mom's Sorry got off of why i got in on this ..
1.your not sure if she is pregnant.
2 The Dr. will help answer any and all questions about how to get her off them and will let you know the list of problems with the fetus if any.
3 I know you must be very upset right now,but first things first wait see if you do have something to worry about and please no killing yoursef,it's ok to feel like that but that's a no no.
4 I sound just like my husband who always said Sue if you don't have something to worry about you will find it.
So really ignore all the above eccept the kill myself part if you need any answers about meds i would be happy to help as well,but i really do think it might make another worry..Grandmonkey i love that,is right about everything. My mom had my brother in 1945,and me in 46 we were born in Hannibal,Mo a town of 20 thousand at 28 and at the age of 29 she was in love he wasn't My grandmother was not happy,but we were cute and she helped raise us till we were 6 and 7 and yes my mom was on meds,My brother is a Lawyer and i turned out to be a er truma nurse.. Good luck and post if you like..Many blessings, Old but in Sue i like this girl thing once in awhile Really i hope every thing works out.

I had Wes when I was 19. It was rough but I grew up instantly. I wasn't on any meds then and was actually more stable. I am getting worse with age. LOL.

IF she ends up preggers, then worry. The meds are scary, but the docs will be able to guide the both of you towards the best decision.

I hope this isn't the case. Just hang in there. Try to occupy your time with other things. (I hate waiting for anything, let alone waiting to see if your life is going to change dramatically. )

Jacqui
I was wanting children so bad that I did let slip ups happen...all four of them. the oldest after I remarried and was 40! I never grew up, but so dearly wanted my children....But the older one was not planned, I was young and not even involved with anyone....but God took something difficult and gave me a blessing.

I know how I felt with de and taking her for Depo and your exact feelings as I would not only right now have her three cats, but any children she would have had to care for too at 52 years old.

NOT to add worry, But I am still on Depo provera ( I have tubes tied, but had heavy periods) and my de was too. We had big trouble with it.
THE GENERIC! break through bleeding, and if periods, if you have bleeding you can get pregnant from what the doctor told me.

So I think the generic is way too week to prevent pregnancy if we were bleeding like that. The first month I spot, the second I have a full period, then I have to take a second shot....I am going to speak to her about BRAND only! I havemy tubes tied, but after October when this deveoped with the generics for us, I was so concerned.

I would NEVER reccomend the generic and even warned my gyn that there could be unwanted pregnancies in her practice from it if that is the case....not strong enough. They do ahve those strips they implant, never read much about them though...

I am saying a prayer,
lots of time there is cary over protection from long term use of depo....so I hope that is the case of your daughter...

BUT Mom even if you forgot with all on your mind...I wonder if daughter truley forgot or if a poattern maybe happening. Her age, wanting a child may be developing....A talk on caring responsibility, gee from her sister she shold see the problems and responsibilities that a child would bring on without a husband to support each other.

Just my rambling thoughts as each depo shot I worried as you to keep on top of things.
Love to you
Di

Pamster - first off, I LOVE your avatar, it's cute! Second, I went to your Chronic Pain link, and that's really cool, too! Looks like lots to read and comment on, maybe whenI have some time this 3 day week-end! Thank Goodness foor my alternate work week schedule, where I get every other Friday off!!. Last, but not least at all, are your comments - thank you so much for replying, and so quickly, too (I'm on my break now ) I DID forget to mention that my daughter is also a Chronic Pain sufferer, who finally had her breast reduction surgery in Nov of last year - went fr 40 FF or G, or something to 40 DD; she couldn't go any smaller because she had gained weight (Seroquel) and she would have been horrified at the results of something smaller !! She has back pain forever! Also, due to her several accidents, she also has neck pain, knee pain, etc, etc. So there'zs all that, too....And in case yoou hadn't read my siignature (or wait - are you a spiney, too - w/ a different name ? I suffer fr chronic pain, too, and iit's getting more compliicated (more body parts invollved) and worse every day....

Mari - I'm sure you weren't boring Thanks for your reply! Break's over More later, hugs....

Hi Jacquie,

I am glad my posting made you feel better, I had hoped you'd gotten a chance to see it before you left. Thanks for the compliments on my littla avatar, he's like my site's mascot, I just love him! He's a little mad scientist drinking a potion who turns into all kinds of things and I have made each one an avatar so I can alternate. I thought the Princess in Distress as I call it was cute too so I went with it for now because I have been feeling so stressed out about the sleep study I had done which came back to me today in the mail. I will post about it in my thread about the CPAP machine I got.

Things are looking up here, I am so sorry your daughter suffers chronic back pain, is she seeing a pain management doc yet? I am going to get an IUD since I have had a child I can get one, and then I won't worry about getting pregnant on meds. I really can't imagine having to get off of them so I totally empathize with where you're coming from. If you wanna PM me about something feel free to okay? We're all here for you and things will work out so stay strong.

I just added a page to Cyber-Soup today about Slepp Apnea otherwise known as Obstructed Sleep Apnea or OSA. I have learned a lot about it in a few short days of researching it online and I am so relieved I got my machine, if you suspect your daughter is stopping breathing during her sleeping cycles you should get her to talk to her dr and tell him you've seen her stop breathing and that she should be observed for a sleep study because let me tell you what, I wake up now, two days running in NO PAIN and I have chronic pain from a motorcycle accident in 87' the pain hits me later in the morning as I am sitting in my wheelchair but man those first few minutes are wonderful now! I am stunned by the dramatic difference getting a good night's sleep means for our bodies.

Does your daughter snore? I used to until I got a chin strap and this nasal mask where it delivers a constant pressure of air so that I do NOT stop breathing, I saw in the results on the study I was breathing at a level of 26% meaning I wasn't breathing almost 75% of the time which is frightening! I hope she doesn't snore but if she is having apnea getting it taken care of can really make a huge difference, at least it has for me and my mother.

Hi J - I am praying for you she isn't pregnant. I agree too, if she hasn't had a period in that amount of time, I really doubt she can get pregnant.

Can you do one of those home tests that is for early detection?

So, you don't have to wait and worry.

Oh, and YES I did many stupid things at her age and younger and older.
What was I thinking, guess thought oh it can't happen to me, and it didn't, Thank God.

Hang in there sweety, Hugs, Nikko