Butterfly,

Here are some pictures of Capetown on youtube.

Cape Town - Overview (No voice).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpFp5hhCZ4w

Cape Town -- This one is narrated by a local person.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yL3HXXsd3Oc

Clifton Beach Cape Town South Africa (This one starts with loud music -- you might need to turn it down.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R101gCU4XAg

Have fun with your new church member.

Mari

Penguins Mari, there are penguins in the 1st video! I'm def going to have to ask her about that!

Dear Butterfly,

As my former French Teacher would say "what you don't know 'bout, leave it out." he was referring to exams, but i found it works in life, at work, in general.

Some people do enjoy being asked about their comings and goings. Especially in this case if she is new to the US as I understand it? I however grew up kind of left and right and found questions about where i'd been tiresome... they always came from people i did not know well and with whom i did not wish to share. you could ask how she is doing after the move, focusing more on the here and now... has the settling in been smooth for her in the US? stay general... give her a chance to 1) share OR 2) give you a short vague answer and change subjects.

Personally, i'd much rather be asked more "superficial" and common things at first, and i do the same. have you seen <recent movie> ... did you like it? do you read much... enjoy music? gardening is one possibility, or the more general "how do you like to spend your leisure time?" i also like the other person to share if they are going to ask a particular question. so if asking specific questions, best to ask about things you are interested in. don't ask if she collects stamps if you could care less to have a conversation about stamps!

you and this woman have at least one really "easy" topic in common too... your kids... you can talk about how they were as babies, when they started to talk, were they fussy or quiet, etc... talk about your experiences as moms.... you probably had very different experiences with each of your kids.

also, nothing says you have to "lead" the conversation. you can let her lead. if she misses South Africa, she might start talking to you about it without being asked. that might be entertaining. if so, then you can ask questions in the context of what she tells.

it can also be nice to sip tea and relax in company, yet not maintain rigorous conversation. just sit quietly at times, perhaps with the odd comment. that depends on the company - some can do it, some can't. i rather like it.

------------------------------------

i chuckled at the Queen of England question, because i've been asked that before. i doubt you came off as duhhh. trust me from personal experience A LOT of folks are not aware of when (or sometimes WHETHER) former colonies, gained independence, unless they have lived there personally. I don't! so, i wouldn't worry about seeming DUHHH. And although I may not have liked to be interrogated on my comings and goings, I never thought anyone stupid for their curiosity, or even misconceptions. You personally strike me as a bright individual... i'm certain that comes through in person. Remember that even the most intelligent people don't know everything about everything! So lay your worries to rest, in that department.

Mostly try to relax and enjoy yourself. Go with the flow. ~~~



~ waves ~

you can ask her open ended questions...I like what waves had to say.
So she can elaborate or not depending upon her desires.
I would not worry too much about this...sorry that you are though.
my mother in law said it is going to be below 0 tonight...happy for our warm temps to day. wonder what their winters are like?

bizi

good question! I don't know what their winters are like. I saw penguins in a video Mari sent me, so maybe it gets cold. Or that could have been a zoo.

I think you are onto something waves. This is her first time in the US. In retrospect I was bombarding her with questions about her hometown. She seems to miss it there so I though she'd want to talk about it. I guess I just wanted to convey that I care and am interested. Because of her husband's job they will be here for 3 years. I just feel sorry for her because she already misses home and her family.

Awesome questions/idea. I am going to have to write them down and make a "cheat sheet" for when she come over. ha!

Butterfly,

Did you talk about yourself?
You probably have projects you are working on that you could show her.
Maybe you have crafting or cooking or collecting things that you do now or you used to do. Talking about and touching actual "stuff" is easy sometimes.


M

I think she said she meets with her on friday. so that is a good suggestion.
bizi