[Brokenfriend]

I feel like I have been shunned all of my life when it comes to these mental health challenges. I thought that I was the only one who had a web of emotional problems that where sort of like being in a maze when I was becoming a teenager. It got worse when I was a young adult.

Then the phobia clinic was brought to the public attention,and made news in the media. My dad started to understand me. That was a relief,but the damage had already been done,and I want to be by myself. The bipolar,OCD,manic mood swings,and other problems are all difficult to live with,and are not understood by people.

It seemed like I was all by myself most of my life. I had several good friends when I was a kid who I'm grateful to have had.

I just want to withdraw. I want to get away from everybody. Its not possible for people who don't have mental heath issues to fathom the eminence interconnecting nature of it all.

Being shunned is damaging. Being bullied is damaging to the heart,and the pain cannot be expressed. People who bring division are not helpful. I can try,but how can I find help when I've been damaged by so many people on top of having these inherited mental health problems. It's a double,or triple whammy.

So it is inherited. Then some people attack you because they enjoy seeing you hurt. Then we have problems getting doctors,or councilors to help us. It's hard to make a living,and it's hard to marry,and have kids. One,two,three,four,five,then six if we couldn't handle having kids. It's also hard to get,and/or afford insurance.

I'm still here. I have survived much abuse,and tremendous emotional pain,and mistakes from people who didn't understand what was going on with me.

We are surviving a tremendous group of mental health issues that are unable to be fully explained. BF

[Mari]

Dear Steve,

We are indeed survivors.
Also, there is so much that we need and so many ways that we could benefit.

Mari

[patriotrising]

Originally Posted by Brokenfriend

I just want to withdraw

I know this feeling well. So helpful to see someone else say it.

[Dmom3005]

I'm so sorry Steve.

I can so relate. But for different reason's than you had.

I felt somewhat the same when I was a child and teen. I had trouble
making and keeping friends. Only because they seemed to think my
illnesses were contagious. Since no one really had a idea what would
happen next, and what I had. No one could honestly say.

So I didn't have many friends, those I had I tried to hold to close at times.

I learned to be careful and not try so hard as time went on.

I don't have a many close friends now. But I think because mine isn't
a mental illness. I can move on.

Donna

[ginnie]

You will never be hurt here. You are a friend, and I value you. I too was hurt, and am bi-polar. Lost friends too as they didn't understand it. We are together on Neruo Talk, at least we have the folks here who can and do understand. Don't withdraw, forgive those who don't know any better. We are fragile as humans and need to treat each other with dignity. Not everybody gets this. You do, and so do all of us here. I am in your corner. ginnie

[waves]

I am sorry you have been so hurt, Steve. You are such a gentle person, and yet you have received such rough treatment. Not all was out of malice, some was out of ignorance, but even so it hurts. When we are hurt in youth, those wounds leave lasting scars.

I value you as a person. I am honored and happy to have you for a friend. I hope there are times when you are able to feel more at peace with things.

I send you soothing thoughts tonight, and many hugs



waves

[Brokenfriend]

Originally Posted by patriotrising

I know this feeling well. So helpful to see someone else say it.

Patriotrising Welcome to the Bipolar forum. I'm sorry that you have suffered in these deep,painful,and tormenting situations,and ways that I've expressed.

The support here is safe. I hope that you find comfort here. BF

[Brokenfriend]

Thank you everyone for your support. I'm so glad that you all are here. BF

[Mari]

Lots of hugs for you, Steve.


If I think about the past I get angry. If I think about the future I get overwhelmed.

I try to think about this moment right now.
One task at a time and one day at a time.


Mari

[mymorgy]

i am so glad that you have so many interests and your kitty cat that don't involve other people. I isolate too. when i was younger, sports helped me.
i know how painful it is....you are so wanted it. the psalms are really helping me with feelings of emptiness. I don't know if you have those feelings too. You seem to be in such pain. I wish we could soothe it.
bobby