So yesterday, I got waves of being overwhelmed with grief. October is hard. I have been looking into legal stuff regarding planning for after we're gone, to care for kiddo, and it overwhelmed me big time yesterday. I cried so much, 20 minutes of hard sobbing, it was awful, I got over it because his father is so kind to me, he told me I needed to focus on living and making good memories for him like we've done with going to the 3 concerts we've taken him to and other things. That helped calm me down, as did him hugging me. I had to take a anxiety med though. It's going to be okay, I just need to accept that it's going to happen, and to embrace life fully so when my son faces it without me and his father, that he'll have a LOT of fun and pleasant memories to drawn upon.

*Shakes off the grief*

So look at what I started and finished! I bought a Faded Glory Walmart denim jacket last weekend with the intention of doing this to it:





The black fringe is something Mother crocheted for me a few weeks back, specifically for this project. And I finished it in time for the fall! So happy with it! I think it came out fantastic! I added the leopard material to the front panels beneath the pockets too, but I hadn't added them when I shot this short video of it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEUYI8anRHQ

I hope you like it, my mother saw it all finished Sunday when we got together and she said, "Wow Pam, it looks like you paid $150 for it! Easy!" that made me feel so good to hear. I paid $18 and change for it, and I had that leopard material for like five years at least, from an old full length skirt I never did want to wear. I love it! I also made the lanyard I am wearing in the photos and video. So happy with it. I had done this once before, I was 19, and used a cotton bandanna (again leopard print) and it was a different styled jacket, but I did the cuffs, the collar and the tops of the pockets. It was my favorite jacket for years until my son ripped it up about two years ago. I wasn't able to fit it unfortunately, but I still loved it. This time around I made pattern pieces for each area, and then cut the material, leaving a bit of seam allowance for me to turn over the edges so it'd look like it was a clean finish.



Pretty cool eh? Did it all by hand though, didn't want to risk breaking a needle or messing up with how thick it was near some of those seams....Hope you had a great weekend too!

Dear Pam,

Mothers hold a special place in the world.

I love love the jacket and lanyard. You do great work.

M

Pam

All of us with children whether special needs or not. Have to worry
about when we aren't here.

We made some arrangements money wise for Derrick. And I'm trying
to figure out living wise even for now.

I totally understand. I'm just not sure I'm even ready for him to move
in my case.

Donna

Thanks Mari! Thank you Donna, I think what gets to me the most is him thinking about where we are when we're passed on, that he won't understand we've gone onto the next world so to speak. And might think we don't want to be with him or something. Even now just typing that I have tears forming in my eyes and my heart feels heavy.

*shakes off the grief*

Back to the jacket, Yeah I will always treasure it, because Mother helped me with it. As in she was there when I bought it last weekend, and was eager to create the fringe for me, that I'll always treasure. Mothers are very special, I agree Mari. ♥

nice job on the jacket pammie!
thanks for sharing with us.
bizi

I knew you'd all love to see it, and I am very proud of how well it came out too! SO glad you liked it!

Pam, we'll hold hands and walk through these days. I hear ya about the good 20 minute cry. I only let myself go or 20 minutes....
But, I need to wake up my eyes to take care of my health. I need follow up test done, and the reg yearly things are almost three years late...I need to take care of me or I won't be around as long.

I love your jacket, such talent! It is really beautiful. Self healing our hearts is strong power in a person. No prescription, no written plan to follow.
Hugs
Di

Hi, Pam,

'Thinking about you and your family.

Hugs.

Mari