[befuddled2]

Well, I haven't talked much about my neighbor lately that I've had the crush on a while back. Him and I have been talking here and there and just now we talked for a long time. He informed me that he has at the most 6 months to live. He nearly lost his life to cancer just recently. The hospital had him on life support. I need to be a good friend to him now and get ready to watch someone whom I've thought to be special since the beginning of March, die. We talked about death and dying and about his funeral plans. It was creepy but without the crush on him any longer I can talk about these things without too much difficulty. I still hold a special place in my heart for him though. I just have a feeling that I'm going to need a lot of hugs, love, and support to hang in there and look after him in his final days. That's if he'll let me. He wants for me to come back to his place tonight when he gets home from a cookout. And right now I'm still in shock too.

befuddled2

[shiney sue]

Well i'm so sorry to here this,and know your having a hard time. But
i'm glad he has you to listen. Because more then anything that's
what he needs now. You take care of yourself as well. Sue

[DMACK]

Hi and Hugs befuddled 2

I am a great believer that amongst all this confusion and despair we feel in life, that certain people enter our world for a reason. This man is destined to be part of your life and through his trauma you will find answers to your own difficulties in some way. The support i have no doubt that you will offer this man will be just what he needs.

I am a Support Worker and have experienced this situation myself. It is heartbreaking but it certainly makes you a stronger person, and what someone leaves behind you carry it forward in your heart.

Be strong + Take care of you.

[moose53]

((((((Barbara)))))),

I'm so sorry, honey We knew this was lurking in the background, but, it's different to hear it put into words.

I told you I had a feeling that he came into your life for a reason. Maybe to teach you how to open your heart and to love again

David's right -- it's heartbreaking. But, it's the most intimate experience you can share with another human being.

I didn't say it at the time that he pushed you away. But, I had a feeling that he was pushing you away because he didn't want you to get hurt. It speaks volumes about YOU, Barbara, that he's willing to let you close now.

You know we all care about you and love you. We're all here for you 24/7. Let the love surround you and warm the last few cold places in your heart.

Bless you. You're a wonderful person. BIG HUGS.

Barb

[bizi]

Dear Barb,
Did he talk about hospice at all?
They provide help for terminally ill patients in their homes ...have you heard about them before?
Billie(fancylady) is training to be a volunteer with hospice...she started this week.
There are also home care companys to provide care as well if he needs that.
He definately needs friends to listen and spend time with him...you sound prepared to be a friend for him....and have a generous heart to share.
You have a kind soul.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

[DiMarie]

God gave him a special friend, and he knows it.
Our prayers for strength for you and health for Doug BF.
Hugs
Di

[Mari]

Dear Befuddled,
We are here for all the hugs and support you want.
Mari

[mymorgy]

this can be one of the most beautiful experiences of your life. I went through this with two of my dearest friends....Once when I was in my late twenties and my friend had leukemia and once in my early fifties. You just can't fight it.
Bobby with hugs

[befuddled2]

Thanks everyone for your tender words.

He picked out his casket yesterday and told me what it looks like.

Bizi, he has hospice coming on Monday.

I'm okay for now.

befuddled2

[Mrs. Bear]

I'll be here to listen. Sometimes I can't get on and post everyday, but I sure try to check in as much as possible.

Hang in there, love. You are a beautiful woman. Just rememeber to take care of yourself too.