YOur boss doesn't know your struggles?
bizi

NOPE. But she is somewhat perceptive and somewhat observant.
She does know that I prefer afternoon hours over morning hours.


I have not revealed much to Work Buddy either although he is not stupid.

M

When I ate ice cream and granola for dinner, I forgot to take the resperdal.
Later, I did not feel like eating again so I skipped the drug.

I took my other meds including a little less than half of the small dose Ambien (5mgs in a pill).


M

I'm glad that you got those 6 hours of sleep

It makes sense to ask the woman who was with you when you made the mistake for help because she has first hand knowledge of the situation and is therefore equipped to deal with it. I hope that she is willing and able to help fix things.

Disclosing medical and mental health issues is a very difficult decision. You are entitled to certain protections under the law once you do, but once an employer has that information it can leave you very vulnerable. I think you'd probably agree with that sentiment.

I'm very concerned about you Mari
I think that your pdoc could be doing more to help you right now, but I don't fully understand the situation, and I understand that the decision to reach out or not is yours alone.

I hope that the 2.5mg of Ambien helped, you were able to sleep last night, and that today is a much better day for you

Kay,

Regarding the mistake:
I talked to the woman yesterday and got some advice that might work.
The main thing really is that she sees me as doing good work and likes me --
so that is good. If the mistake-thing becomes a huge mess, she will back me up
and people like her.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Regarding disclosing:
I have disclosed multiple sleep disorders. The FMLA documents that the PCP recently
did for me (which I lost and hope are around the house somewhere) say that I
cannot be there early mornings and that I do best with late morning/afternoon/night.

THere is a chance that somewhere in the old HR files is an old FMLA document that my PCP wrote "bioplar" because she was filling out the form quickly.
She wrote it without paying attention.
And I assume that HR was leaky (the idiots gossiped) so for all I know,
everyone at school knows I am "bipolar."
Still, I pretend that I am managing as long as I do not have to be there at 7:00 /8:00/9:00 a.m.
EVERYONE at work knows that I can get
agitated/jumpy/spout off/get loud ---- I am doing better at "covering" for that.
"Covering" takes a huge amount of effort.

M

I see her on AUG 18. I might be willing to ask if there is something else other
than Risperdal. That would be a big step for me. I hate trying new meds.
Both Seroquel and Risperdal helped in these ways:
less depression, less anxiety, more clear headed even with the sleepiness of Seroquel.


But the risperdal has these two disadvantages:
1. has to be taken with food
2. keeps me awake
3. Ambien to help with the Risperdal side effects sucks. I hate Ambien except as an emergency med.

I am comfortable scheduling to see the pdoc every two weeks for a little while.

M

Kay/Mari
Wonder if not taking the Risperdal may have helped the Ambien to work? For some; Risperdal adds to anxiety and insomnia.


Gerry

Gerry,

Ambien works. It just makes me feel awful for the next two days.

I hear you about the Risperdal causing insomnia.


M

I'm glad that you got some advice that may work out well for you, and it seems like you may have a powerful ally now as well

Disclosing your sleep disorders falls into my "exemptions" category… Only disclose medical/mental health information if you are asking for a specific accommodation, there is a crisis, or there is a chance a medical emergency may happen in the workplace (like in the case of a seizure disorders).

I'm glad that the ADA is working for you. Your sleep disorders definitely qualify and you are asking for reasonable accommodations.

I disclosed my MS diagnosis before I was "showing" once, and was badly burned. Long story short: I was forced out of my job at the VA. They're very corrupt. I'd rather not field any questions about the subject.

Sometimes we think that our bipolar diagnosis may be obvious to others, but it isn't always the case. In general people really aren't that educated about it, and usually just chalk things up to personality traits.

I'm glad having the bipolar diagnosis floating around somewhere deep down in HR hasn't caused you any problems. I hate the gossip. When I disclosed my MS dx, my supervisor told everyone on 1st and 2nd shifts (I worked 3rd shift). I had thought that information was supposed to be confidential.

Thursday isn't too far away.

Not wanting to shift too far away from meds like seroquel or risperdal because of their benefits is good information for your pdoc. It will let her know that she's on the right track. She may prescribe a drug in the same class, or one that has a similar action, that isn't as likely to be activating because that is your particular concern.

I really hate kissing frogs too, but I think since you've started seeing some benefits from the last two meds, you're getting closer to finding one that will benefit you that you can tolerate better.

I went through a long period of having to see my pdoc very frequently. I can understand how undesirable it is having to go every two weeks for a while, and coughing up the copay every time you have to do it.

Right now things aren't where you need them to be yet, but you've been very brave about trying new things and showing faith in your new provider to improve your quality of life and well being