i have been spending most of the time reading and watching and playing with the cats. I don't feel like leaving my apartment. I spoke with my friend alice who is about my age and who adores her cats and she says she doesn't feel like leaving her house but she does. When we had dinner she was showing me pictures of her cats on her phone and I started watching her face. It was bliss.
I haven't been doing any exercises and I know what to do.Each day I wake up early and hope this is the day I will start. I don't. I keep on thinking if I can lose weight then maybe I will start. At least I took a bath. the itchiness from drinking coffee has gone away. I am drinking too much half and half. I decided a few days ago it is arrogant of me to think I don't care if I live or die. that is for God to decide. That is a big change. It is sort of like a burden off of me.
Part of the reason I don't want to leave the apartment is my difficulties in walking. I would rather ignore them.