How are you doing Bizi?

Did you go on your trip? How was it?

Had a good time in new orleans. Ate well and stayed in a bed and breakfast place called the degas house. After edgar Degas the artist. back in the 1800's He stayed there and created some 18 pieces of art while living there for 6 months.
The tall ships boat ride was fun. Jeff had fun as well so that was good and he did not get sea sick, dramamine worked, he was sleepy though.
I over indulged with food and drink....seeing my Therapist on tuesday.
I chewed on my thumb hang nail ...it bled and I could not make it stop so went to a store and got some bandaids. This self abuse is not new for me.
I was doing so good, now this.
sigh
bizi

my hang nail is healing, nicely I might add.
Just need to leave it alone!
We are having electrical work done on our house. removing aluminum and replacing with copper outlets.
We are having a handy man do the work, young guy named chris.
He is the nephew of my friend so I trust him.
He is about half way done.
WE will be needing to change out our electrical fuse box. It is not right, did not trip the switch when one of the outlets blew/fried the outlet, we are lucky we did not start a fire. It fried the power strip and my cuisinart food processor. It was the last tangible item from my past marriage, a wedding gift from my mom. I did not use it much.
The new door is in, am waiting to hear from the painter to schedule a date for them to come and stain the door and install it of course.
Still have not gotten a bill from the foundation folks, am surprised about that. I am hoping they let us charge the bill. That way we earn cash back from the transaction, about $150.

Went to fat pats for a couple of beers after work and had jeff come over to have burgers for dinner. They were really good.

I am hiring a friend to clean the house on the first, jeff is just going to have to deal with it. The house is filthy again, cat hair everywhere. Today both my friend and the electric guy were coughing and sneezing. It was embarrassing.
Oh well.
bizi

I never knew that about degas. do you think all the activity in your house is too stimulating and preventing you from not wanting to drink but rather relax?

That is very insightful of you, Bobby :hug:

I'm so glad that you had a good trip and Jeff was able to enjoy the tall ship ride. Staying in the Degas house must have been a nice experience :)

The work on your house is really coming along! It is a lot to deal with tho. Thank God you are getting the wiring redone... it sounds like things are unsafe as they are now. I'm sorry about your food processor :hug:
Don't worry about the workman seeing your house when it's not clean. I'm sure that they have seen a lot worse :hug:


I'm sorry that you're back to picking. I hope you can lay off your thumb so it can continue to heal. I was being so good about not picking my face for a long time, but I really laid into it a few days ago. I haven't touched it since. Hopefully your picking will be a one time thing like it was for me :hug:

Thank you ladies.
Fat pats is a bad habit that I need to break.
bizi

It is festival international time! (music festival)
We have friends coming in to stay with us over the weekend.
I wish the house were cleaner. It is what it is.
jeff said he would sweep and tiddy up on friday before they come.
bizi

It is festival international time (a free music festival)
and we have guests coming in tonight at 10pm.
They will be with us 3 days
I will try to limit myself on eating and drinking, my weight keeps gaining on me.
Have a great weekend! The weather is supposed to be perfect!
bizi

I hope you have a good visit with your fiends and a great time at the festival! :)

Good friends don't judge your for your housekeeping...
My mother had a plaque in the kitchen that said "An Immaculate House Is The Sign Of A Dull Woman." She was not a dull woman lol

The festival was fun!!!
listened to some great music and saw some dancing as well.
guests leave tomorrow. It has been fun visiting them though my room is a mess!
I am so full. ate too much today and
drank too much as well.
Have to work in the morning....getting up at 730 to leave at 8 for an 830am appointment.
then will meet them for lunch at 1130am and such before taking them to the airport at 4;30pm.
I have a henna tattoo on my left hand. It is pretty. She said it would last about a week.
bizi

I'm so glad you had so much fun! :)

I hope your early, busy day goes well! :)

This is embarrassing but I was woken up at 6am by my guests moaning.:eek:
Jeff was sleeping, had ear plugs in.
lol
bizi

I think that I have figured out on piece of this drinking habit of mine.
Have been stopping by fat pats after work to have a beer or two before I go home. But when I am there I immediately get on my phone and go to facebook and spend a half an hour on there while having my beers.
I used to drink at the house but got out of the habit of that.
Today when I got home I actually changed my clothes and raked leaves in the front yard 3 barrels of magnolia leaves that are like a rubber plant leaves very leather like.I stopped raking just before getting blisters like last time. I also pulled a few weeds in flower beds and pulled some ivy that was making its way up the outside brick wall.
Our friends were so nice to us. Dan tidied up the back patio and bought us this beautiful planter today of double hot pink blossoms. He started up our fountain making it nice to sit out there and hear the trickling water.
So what was great about today...I worked for a couple of hours, The temperature was perfect. And it was dry enough that I did not sweat so there fore did not have to take a shower!(I just took one yesterday).
If I can do a small amount of yard work every day that will help .
The yard is so overwhelming...I usually just throw my hands up in the air and forget about it.I am going to pick up some more plants that are shade lovers and put them on the patio. Dan is a landscape guy so I respect his eye. He said a boston fern would be nice back there.
It felt great to be productive and get some work done.
Bizi

I am not an early riser so will be doing some yard work in the evenings, after work instead of being on the computer all of the time.
I have been avoiding work. The weather has been so beautiful and a lovely spring. It will get hot soon enough. The yard waste folks come tomorrow.
I had our yard man trim our bushes and he trimmed them too short. I think it killed them. heavy sigh
They were so pretty. They look awful now, I hope they come back. I am sure my neighbors will be so upset, they were the ones to enjoy the blooming azaleas, hot pink in color. time will tell.
bizi
My SI joint is bothering me....
sigh

OMG it's so funny, but a little gross, that you heard your house guests doing the nasty! :eek:

It's awesome that you got so much yard work done! :)
It must have felt very rewarding. It sounds like a good way to keep yourself busy. I would get a pair of work gloves so you don't get blisters on your hands, and they're good for pulling up weeds, too. You can pick a pair up at a hardware store. They're very cheap. It was very nice of your friend to help out.

I'm sorry that the landscapers cut those shrubs/bushes too short. They should have known better. They should grow back tho... hopefully quickly.

I'm sorry that your hip is bothering you again. I hope that it is better today :hug:

thank you kay.
went to a birthday party last night and had chinese food. very very good, ate too much and drank too much.
oh well.
bizi

I am not well.
I should have showered this morning but am finding it hard to get up in the mornings. Need to hop into the shower.:(
Just realized that I am a month behind in my billing. usually I send bills out every 2 weeks. It has never been a month behind, I will have to apologize for being tardy.:o
Have been at pats every night this week.
While there, I met a potential new client. his name is Bob, I have spoken with him twice this past week. He said he wanted to treat his daughter and granddaughter to pedicures. :)
I gave him my card. Will see if he calls me.
My weight is up because we have been eating out more. Like tonigth we went to whole foods and had a couple of beers and ate a big cheese tray, it was huge!!Then we came home and had pork chops. Am stuffed!
Our handy man: Cris has one more switch to replace in the closet that he forgot about. He is coming in the morning.
All said and done it will cost us $600 instead of $3K if we had hired an electrician, from what he said.
Next project is the front door.
We have not gotten a bill from the foundation folks yet and that was weeks ago, wonder why?
Sigh
bizi
I really need to hop into the shower!!!!!!!!!

I finally took a shower and I feel better.
bizi

I'm sorry to hear that you are not well... (((HUGS)))
I'm glad that the shower helped in some sense.

Maybe the foundation guys are behind in their billing, too? ;)
That is something you're going to have to hunker down and get to... you have to get paid, woman! When I was drinking, it's a chore I would sit down to do with a couple of beers.

I hope that Bob does call you. It would be a nice change to get to do some (hopefully) young pretty feet :)

I need to get done sooner today to tackle my billing and other paper work that I hate doing, but got to bill if I want to be paid!
Working out of town tomorrow.
bizi

After work I stopped off at whole foods for a beer.
Then went home. Hubby knew that I went somewhere, so I told him.
I was going to do paper work and then if I finished I would go back to whole foods for trivia. Hubby was going over there earlier to grab a table for our friends. I ended up going to whole foods with him. As I did not want to drive after drinking a few beers. So trivia was fun. and we finished up at 8;15.
Came home and decided that I would put on some cat stevens and do my paper work. It took me 2 hours to send 24 bills and make a deposit.
I still have some filing to do.
So I am happy that I got my work done, I will finish the rest on sunday.
I also want to do some yard work sunday.
I work out of town saturday/tomorrow.
May the fourth be with you.
Bizi

lol... We watched a little of episode 7 (of Star Wars) last night, but really weren't in the mood to get into the "holiday."

I'm glad you got a ride to trivia with Jeff so you could enjoy yourself while being safe :hug:

You should be proud of yourself for getting all that paperwork out of the way- I know how much you hate it!

Have a nice day today! Enjoy your oatmeal! :)

thanks Kay!
Happy cinco de mayo!
I have had better oatmeal before but still enjoyed it!
The last lady that I saw it was really hard.
She is bed bound and her nails grow rounded making them really hard to trim without nicking her. I trimmed them as short as I could and painted her nails which she seemed to like. She was very hard of hearing so that made it difficult to communicate with her.
Any way, all of the other clients were fine.
I saw five clients today.
Jeff is leaving soon to go play with the sky liners the 20 piece jazz band that has dances every other month, think 40's - 50's music.
He won't be home until late as he helps set up and break down.
nobody else volunteered.
sigh
bizi

excessive eating, drinking and internet....
sigh
bizi:(

All of your Saturday clients are in one facility, right? It must make it much easier to get 5 clients done without the travel in between.
I'm sorry that your oatmeal wasn't as good as it usually is. I know that you look forward to having it when you work on Saturdays out of town :hug:

I know that your addictive behaviors have been weighing on you :hug::hug::hug:
When do you see your therapist again?

In a week I think.....
sigh
bizi

I'm glad you don't have too long to wait. I know you like her and trust her :hug::hug::hug:

I am thinking I am quitting therapy.
I am just not able to get my life straightened out I feel like I am wasting money going to her. I am paying out of pocket for her....We still have that 4K deductible, which we will never meet unless one of us goes to the hospital, forbid. Not working on my issues because my addictions take up the whole time. Need to think about this...
I chewed the crap out of my thumb last night.
sigh
bizi

Bizi,

Be patient with yourself.

Is it possible that you need different/ more medications?


M

last time I saw pdoc and therapist we said that I am dealing with addictions, not an episode.:(
bizi

I saw Robin my tdoc today. We had a good session. Though I told her that I wanted to put our sessions on hold. Thru the years of therapy, That I felt like I was talking and talking and not really getting anywhere.
She pointed out that I avoided a lot of things, house hold work the yard that stopping by pats was a habit....
She said sometimes people need a break...so that is what we are doing.
She left the door wide open...I really like her.
I gave her a hug good bye.
I felt deflated.
bizi

It's great that you like your therapist.

I hope that the break helps you.

M

Thanks Mari,
We had a really good session today. It was the first time that I ended therapy doing it the right way. In the past I have just canceled appointments with out explanation. No closure.
I guess when I am ready to dig deeper than I will call on her again.
bizi

I'm glad that you did what you felt was right for you, Bizi. Therapy isn't for everyone all the time :hug::hug::hug:

You know that dual diagnosis is extremely common. I don't want you to always blame your addictions without entertaining the thought that sometimes you may be having an episode, too. The rise in addictive behaviors can signal an episode, but not always. I'm not suggesting you are hypo now :hug:

I'm sorry that you are chewing on your thumb again :hug:

You sound unhappy right now... sending you some (((((HUGS)))))

We have complimentary tickets to see the symphony tonight at 7pm.
They are performing in a big st. johns cathedral along with the BREVE, early music singers.
I am really looking forward to going.
Just got a text that my mother got her plant that I sent for mothers day.
I think she liked it. LOL
I had a break at lunch so shopped for some food for the weekend at sandras health food store where I eat lunch most days.
homemade veggie soup, tabouli, salmon marinated already (one pound is 4 meals total and put those in the freezer.), talapia which is frozen so put it in the fridge to thaw and will invite our friend over to eat dinner with us.....
food glorious food!
I think we are going to have organic, grass fed beef franks(hot dogs) for dinner tonight.
What to wear for the symphony??? I have gained so much weight. Any thing goes really.
So I should not worry about it. I have black jeans to wear or black leggings with a fancy blouse that I wore at new years. It has some silver little studs for bling.
Have a great weekend yall!
bizi

How was the symphony? I am sure that you enjoyed it.



M

It sounds lovey... I hope you had a good time! :)

Do you have the whole weekend off?

The symphony was good except I kept falling asleep.
sigh
I was embarrassed because later I realized that friends of ours were directly behind us.
sigh
I slept very late today. I have been sleeping more lately.
Got out of bed at 1040am, went to bed at midnight last night.
Only had one night sweat that went away quickly thank goodness.
I am not going thru menopause gracefully.
today I get my hair colored and maybe cut. 3 months ago I had a botched cut somewhere other than aveda school where I normally go. I need for them to fix the problem.
Getting another hot flash....sigh
my hands sweat while working and makes it difficult to work with my tools, I keep having to wipe my hands off, and wiping my face off as the sweat will run into my eyes....
sigh
have a good saturday yall.
bizi
Hubby wants to go to a music trivia brewery with friends out of town today. There will be much drinking involved. I want to go to art walk instead. If I could find someone to go with me....I need more friends.

I'm sorry you are dealing with symptoms of menopause Bizi. It must be very uncomfortable, and the work part must be very frustrating :hug::hug::hug:

Do you think you may be sleeping more because you are depressed, or do you think you just need more sleep right now for another reason?

I hope that your hair grew out enough so the hairdresser was able to style it in a way you really love :hug:

And I hope you were able to find someone to go with you to the art walk, or you ended up having a good time at music trivia.

I ended up going to music trivia. The 2 other women there did not talk to me. I felt like an outsider.:( Which did not help my social anxiety issues.

Over all Had a ok time, ate way too much, 2 cups of a rice dish called jamblyia(sp?) with chicken and pork, and had a huge raspberry snow cone.
For every right answer you get a free beer. Their were 2 teams so we ended up each with 3 six packs of beer.

So they were all happy about that.:)
They are all musicians and this was music trivia.


Jeff is out of town for a couple of days. He is Vacationing with his guy pals at Galveston Texas. They rented a house near the beach. They plan on fishing and doing guy things and will be home late tuesday.

I have talapia and veggie soup and am trying to find a dinner date.
I don't like being alone as you know....
It is after noon and I have still not gotten ready for the day.
My hair cut and color turned out nice, though my grays came out lighter than the rest of the hair so it looks like a new high light which is good.
I put on some work clothes and plan to go out to lunch at the diner and will do some yard work this afternoon.
There is so much that needs to be done, it is overwhelming.
I have a friend coming over to clean the house monday afternoon, I need to get her some cleaning supplies and make a list of things that I want done....
Some time soon, I need to take the car into the shop to have the air conditioner trouble shooted. It is unreliable on long trips. It is just fine for my daily trips. But on 3 different long distance trips last year it gave out on us. Which was terrible.
Well I have had 3 cups of coffee and had better finish getting ready for the day.
bizi