[bizi]

Originally Posted by DejaVu

Hi bizi!

Love you!
DejaVu

well hello there!
love you too!
bizi

[OhKay]

You've been a little quiet, Bizi... how are you doing?

[bizi]

Thanks Kay,
Last friday we saw the movie a star is born it was a great movie!!!!
Not drinking at my friends house last night was challenging. everyone was drinking. They are so nice...and easy. It was difficult for me, I have social anxiety issues. I just sit and watch, don't have much to contribute.
I did discover that brian, our friend has memory issues too. So that was ....can't come up with a good adjective.
But it was a relief to find somebody like me (he is a bit younger than me).
If that makes sense.
bizi

[bizi]

I just realized this evening that I have been hypo manic, for weeks. Vacations do this to me. Alot of this is mental. I am sure if I told jeff he would question me. I know me best.
I need to be very careful.
bizi

[OhKay]

Why do you think Jeff questions you like that? Talking to Corey is like talking to a brick wall. I think we both need something in the middle, and more support in this area in general.

I understand, more than most, about being careful so that things don't progress or you don't give in to the hypomania too much...

But if you have been hypo for weeks, Bizi, you have been very strong. After all, you didn't drink at that party Tuesday, and you have been so good about sticking to your plan.
I hate that sometimes it takes so long for us to figure out that we are having episodes. It's so hard

I think I understand how you feel about meeting someone else who is as young as you with a problem with their memory, too. It's rare that I meet someone else my age that has MS as bad (or worse) than I do. We can spot each other by the way we walk. It makes me sad, but at the same time, it makes me feel less alone. Maybe you feel the same way?

I want to see that remake of A Star Is Born. I'm glad that you liked it!

[Dmom3005]

I too would like to know why you think your or were hypo.

I know when you are or were other times what you did that
showed this to you later. But I've not heard of anything that
would show this.

I wonder if its the let down from such an wonderful trip and being
back. If that makes sense.
Donna

[bizi]

Good morning.
I think I am coming down....
slept in today shut off my alarm, I was supposed to take a shower but just could not get up. I will take one tomorrow before our lunch and getting my hair done at 1;30.
I will have a new gal. Hopefully I will like her.
When I am hypo my writing is off. I looked at some figures from before our trip and it did not look my hand writing. Even now I am having a hard time typing making typos left and right. Having to correct many sentences.
While in europe, time flew by...I hardly remember a thing. That is what happens when I go on vacation. We rush thru things.
I think my memory is so bad due to an intake problem, maybe I am ADD.
We drank a lot of alcohol on our trip. It was me that kept us up until midnight the last night when we had to get up at 4am...then had a 24 hour travel time the next day.
My routine is off and doesn't come naturally. I skip steps and move onto something else.
yesterday My work was fine but am tired. Saw 5 people yesterday which is a lot for me usually I see 4 clients. my day starts at 10am this morning giving me plenty of time to post and surf the boards.
I still feel hypo.
I was hypo when ordering all of those meal plans. Got confused when one was coming then 2 were scheduled for the same delivery date. I was able to fix the dates. sigh


I am starting to analyze jeffs behavior.
He procrastinates things that are his responsibility around the house.
I am calling him out on this.
I sort of feel like he wants me to do every thing and I am now resisting.
I gave the check book to him to do months ago, to get him involved with money matters.
WE need to give money back to the line of credit once we figure out the check book. We moved alot of money from savings as well.
I think booking the trip to paris was an impulsive/ hypo thing, we charged it to our line of credit. Then I was really hypo getting ready for the trip.

So this line of credit is like a charge card with good interest rate: 5.9%
This is the first time in many years that we have debt out side of our regular car loans and mortgage. Since I am coming down I can see these things more clearly now.
Jeff doesn't question my actions and goes along with what ever I want to do. This puts all of our spending, finances on me, though he is doing the check book now. WE have never had a budget.we spend freely, going out to eat for lunch and and some dinners, but go out on the weekends as well

Buying facial treatments was impulsive as well.
I put them on my credit card.
I was confused where I bought Euros from either checking or savigs. yesterday I figured out they came out of savings. That is where I thought my hand writing was not my writing. and asked jeff about it.
sigh
I hope I don't come down to hard.
bizi

[OhKay]

I do a lot of the same things as you do when I'm hypo/manic, Bizi...
A lot of it is a lack of impulse control

My handwriting and writing suffers, too. I thought I was alone there. It's weird, isn't it?

I'm sorry that you are dealing with the aftermath financially. I know that you will be able to handle/take care of that tho

I'm sorry that Jeff is not doing his part around the house... you know I can relate to that. I hope since you have picked up on that, and have called him out on it, that he starts to step up and pitch in

I wish you could remember more about your trip. I remember you had a hard time remembering the details of your last trip to Europe, too

I hope that you don't come down too hard either, but I don't think you will. You have been able to maintain some control throughout this episode, so I think that will work in your favor

[bizi]

Thank you kay.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

[bizi]

Went to bed at 12:45am.
Woke up once to pee then got up at 10;45...9 hours.
I needed the sleep.
I feel better this morning.
My routine this morning seemed more natural and not half hazard like last night and yesterday.

On to my 2nd cup of coffee.
When you are manic to do cut back on your coffee intake?
Looking back over the past several years I have had episodes before during and after the event. Never reached mania so that is good.
I am not going to florida with my family this coming march. Just can't handle that....My mother turns 80 this year. Feb 3rd...need to come up with something special for her.
I never did tell jeff that I was hypo. He doesn't see it.
Or rather we don't talk about it.
Maybe he does see it, Maybe I will ask him at lunch today. Chicken and sausage gumbo. yum.
Have a good day yall.
bizi