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-   -   out of control (https://www.neurotalk.org/bipolar-disorder/251129-control.html)

Mari 06-22-2018 05:06 AM

I hope you get your lease so that will be off your mind

mymorgy 06-23-2018 02:26 AM

I had a major meltdown today. I didn't get my lease. I intellectually know I will get it but it is so stressful. My therapist came at two. I didn't remember her telling me that she would come an hour later. My anxiety went through the roof. I told her I though she was hit by a car or something. she reached in her pocketbook and said on sat she went for a two hour walk with a friend and her dog and showed me a picture of her dog drinking from a fountain. I was melting down and in no mood to see her dog. I think I am too much for her. I told her that if she changes the appt to remind me that day or if she cancels remind me that day. I told her my anxiety is hitting me from three sides.that is my biggest problem. I was in such a black mood. Later after she left I think it helped me with my anxiety. I told her I was upset about trump and medicare and that any idiot could see his plotting to lower taxes for the very wealthy and then say there was no money for medicare etc.
she did help me fill in my new address book. i am too much for her.

Mari 06-23-2018 04:41 AM

Agree about telling her that if she changes the appt or cancels she needs to give you a second call.

Her doing the address book for me would be huge -- glad that she was useful.

Is it the case that the rabbi is more helpful than this therapist?

=-=
We all saw that Tax cut and the ramifications that would follow.
. . . . 'So very disheartening.

=-=-=

Would it help you to have a device to keep audio messages for yourself?
I have a "voice memo" app on my phone that I use a lot for work.
The weird thing is that I do not have to refer to it much --- once I make the
voice memo, I can usually remember unless the memo has particular details.

I do depend on my calendar on my computer, but that system is not fool proof.

I often take lots of pictures using my phone that I refer to later.
For example, if I jot down something on a scrap of paper, and take a picture of it
-- even if the pictures are less organized in a way to retrieve than the Memos are.

M

mymorgy 06-23-2018 05:15 AM

the rabbi is in a different stratosphere than this insensitive therapist. while I am melting down can you imagine her starting off looking for her cell phone to show me a picture of her dog drinking water from a fountain and adding how she took a two hour walk and being insensitive to my having trouble walking two blocks? I have trouble using the camera. I would have to buy a gadget for memos which I would rarely use.
I have to start remembering that I have faith in God and everything is for the good even if we cant understand it. Even Hitler was good. that is what I am going to work on. I guess I have to speak up when she does something insensitive and that will be a lesson. I will tell her her telling me about her two hour walk when I can hardly walk two blocks was insensitive.

Mari 06-23-2018 07:03 AM

Talking to her about the walk makes sense.

Is she useful to you in any way?


M

mymorgy 06-23-2018 07:37 AM

I have always had trouble with therapists. This forum is incredible. I feel I am understood and have been given good advice and you all have been empathetic -I really think she is over her head with me. she is not like a sledgehammer but she really isn't empathetic or sensitive. she is making me learn how to assert myself which I have a hard time doing unless I get furious.I think she has common sense but I hate when somebody assumes something rather than knows it as a fact. Do you know what I mean? Like yesterday she said something and I asked her if she were making an educated guess or if she really knew as a fact.
anyways trying to believe that everything is for the good is the only way I can think of to tackle stressful situations causing extreme anxiety is the solution and try not to let the anxiety get out of hand. I also have to learn to be kind and control my irritability

mymorgy 06-23-2018 11:03 AM

I am so depressed. I am not that anxious now. yesterday was really a nightmare

PurpleFoot721 06-23-2018 01:24 PM

I hope today turns out to be a better day for you.

mymorgy 06-23-2018 01:37 PM

thank you so much

Mari 06-24-2018 01:53 AM

Thinking good thoughts for you, Bobby.



M


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