Cecilia just opened up to me. She is a twin. The worse thing she told me was that her mother told her she told the hospital to kill her because she was premature. Her mother told her that. She told me many other things that were so sad and abusive but that topped it!

wow bobby, that must have been a hard conversation.
(((((HUGS))))
bizi

I heard so many horror stories when I was a child psychologist but nothing topped that. I called her and told her that thank God she had had a great boyfriend for years. I told her no therapy could help her with childhood. she said she and her twin had their own language and didn't talk swedish til they were five.

I started thinking. I saw a boy who watched his father beat his mother to death. I think they were both just as bad.
I called my long lost friend to wish her well on her colonoscopy this afternoon and said hi to her long term boyfriend. It doesn't seem that long ago.

Poor Cecilia!

You are being a very supportive friend to your friends

I was stressed out yesterday. this morning a friendly visitor from Dorot is coming over with goodies for the holidays for about an hour. I always get nervous wondering if we will have anything to talk about. I have to straighten my apartment. My sheet always comes undone because of the mattress and I have a hard time putting it back on. I usually wait for Marci who does it in a breeze.

made the bed. this time was easy. when looking for religious music finally found a song i couldn't remember the name of
http://leonardcohen.com/video/everybody-knows

I'm so glad that you are having a friendly visitor today!

I'm sure that you will find things to talk about... you could always talk about your friends...

I am happy she is coming over!
bizi

The friendly visitor was a young woman who spoke beautifully and was very nice. There was no connection. I shared the goodies she brought. I gave her some to take home with her.
Then my friend called and invited me over to see her apartment. It was so lovely. There was a big connection. We talked for three hours. The time sped by. I go really wound up so I had a hard time sleeping. It was my bipolar.
I slept for about three hours altogether. I thought a lot about God and suffering and how I feel closer to God when I am suffering. I wasn't suffering yesterday and it felt like the old times but I wish I had felt closer to God. I don't know if I have to start reading the Bible or what. That is not like me.She mentioned coming over again and seeing a documentary her twenty year old granddaughter made when she was 17 and picked up by HBO.She mentioned driving with me to Stanford and seeing her son. She talked so much about her family. What an interesting family.Her grandmother was very strong and in Turkey at that time the women had rights.