I am so sorry. Is it everything? Have you been able to go to the beach or will that not help? I hope your sister and husband have been nicer to you.
fondly
bobby

I am sorry to hear that you are in such mental pain and are feeling unsafe, if I am reading right.
Please be kind to yourself, you sound rather vulnerable right now.
I am sorry.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

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Mari

I'm sending good thoughts, and some gentle hugs. I wish I knew how
to help. I just wish I knew how to help if I could I'd give you my
phone number and tell you to call me so you could send your husband
off the the gym and I could talk to you while he was gone.

Then when he returned he could be there for you.

Donna

you are so sweet donna.
((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Thank you.

I want you to feel okay, Mari. And I want you to be and feel safe

I can understand not feeling "okay," and not wanting to be left alone when feeling like that
I would drive Corey crazy by calling him at work a lot, but I wouldn't tell him why because I didn't want to upset him either. I usually don't tell him much about my mental health in general.

Is there anything you think your pdoc can do for you to help with how you're feeling? I know you haven't had much luck with what she has prescribed for other things in the past, but maybe you will have more luck with meds for your current sx, or maybe you can ask for a script for something you have tried and had luck with in the past? I know you have been frustrated in the med department. I hope I'm not upsetting you by bringing it up, but I thought it was important to bring it up

I hope that these feelings somehow pass soon
We are here if and when you want to talk

I once asked current pdoc for a Tricyclic because they seemed to help me when I was in my 20s and before the SSRIs became available.

She sort of did a slight shake of her head "no" -- not even actually.
It did not seem like an option.

I might email her re the theTricyclic. It would be cool if I did not have to
drive for an appointmen for that.

She and I would have to find a liquid version or something that comes
in a tiny dose/baby dose.

It would be great if she would be willing to go along with that, Mari.
I would really emphasize your sensitivity to meds and your reasoning for wanting to retry a tricyclic antidepressant in the email. She has thrown so much heavy s- with so many s/e at you, I can't see why she wouldn't give something with less s/e that has worked for you in the past a try.

I hope that she is receptive to your email and you don't have to make a trip into the office

I am hoping she listens to you, you know your body best.
((((HUGS))))
bizi