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Old 06-14-2019, 01:20 PM #111
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Thank you so much for all this Donna

I just explode indeed and, lash out anything I find around.... yes.... I mean, I know it can be such a problem.... that's why Im gonna tell my doc just in case he decides to medicate me for it....

Thank you


Quote:
Originally Posted by Dmom3005 View Post
Um, I'm going to take a stab at the anger.

And say, yes I've seen it kind of first hand. My oldest in his youth through
now. Has always had it. Any thing could get in the way. In his case
it was called intermittent explosive disorder. But he would just explode.
And I'm going to say lash out at whatever was the closest . It could
be a wall to punch, a brother to take a reclining like chair and leave
a whole in a wall because he thought he said something he didn't.

Just pulling a phone his mom was holding out of a wall because he didn't want her to talk to the person he knew she was talking to. Many more.

In his case, the medicine that works is depakote, but there are honestly
others that I have heard that others use.

I am not saying this is the same thing you are experiencing. But when
I first heard of it, I had just learned that Derrick had epilepsy and being the
mom I am had read every thing I could on epilepsy, and had read about
rage seizures. And I had first thought that Dan had rage seizures. Which
was then diagnosed with the intermittent explosive disorder. He was
just 16 years old, and his psychiatrist at the residential placement he was
in right then, which is another story. Told me she couldn't diagnose children with bipolar, that was what I had asked if she thought he had. But she could treat for what she thought he might have and it would treat both. Just in case after a while it was determined he did.
Which know he is diagnosed with both.

Donna
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Old 06-14-2019, 01:22 PM #112
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Thanks.... I will have to check on that.... Im an expert when it comes to gaining weight due to meds / water retention....

Quote:
Originally Posted by mymorgy View Post
be careful of depakote. I gained almost seven pounds in a few weeks and I was always exhausted and slept so much. i am bipolar II with depression and anxiety so it was probably the wrong medication for me
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Old 06-14-2019, 02:06 PM #113
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I did not gain any weight on Depakote, but I experienced major side effects.

I'm so sorry you don't feel important to anyone. Please remember that you are important to us, and we are always here for you (((HUGS)))

It sounds like you may have exercise-induced asthma, too. We need to come up with another outlet for your anger...
I'm very glad that you will be talking to your pdoc about it (((HUGS)))
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Old 06-14-2019, 06:14 PM #114
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Dan doesn't gain weight on depakote either. So its good.

It is just different people and different drugs.

Donna
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Old 06-18-2019, 10:03 PM #115
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Blue. I'm sorry that you have been feeling these feelings. I haven't done much computer stuff because I've been in the hospital for around a week and a half.

I hope that you are feeling better tonight. BF
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Old 06-19-2019, 10:30 AM #116
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Friend

I'm sorry to hear you've been in the hospital.

Majo, Hope your doing well.

Donna
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Old 06-19-2019, 01:49 PM #117
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Thank you dear friends !!!

I guess I have to get used to my miserable life because doc said no more medicine for me.
Im kinda glad, I mean, I cant afford many meds, I hate side effects and, yeah, I came back with a bunch of therapy books and exercises

I have so much stress in my life.

Tomorrow would have been mom's birthday so, I... in a bad mood to say the least.

Love for all

Majo
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Old 06-19-2019, 05:51 PM #118
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Blue You need to get another doctor as soon as possible. After talking to you over the years I find you to be a good person. You and the rest of us need to have good doctors.

That doctor failed you. You deserve better.

I'm sorry about your mother. I believe that she would want you to carry on. She'd want you to be strong. Be strong. We all care about you. BF
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Old 06-20-2019, 02:07 PM #119
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So glad to read you dear friend Wishing you a speedy recovery.

I have been thinking a lot (probably overthinking) about doctors failing me... I dont think only my doctor failed me... all of them, medicine, science in general have failed me.... maybe it was society when since I was a kid, made me misunderstand that medicine and doctors can save me, can cure me....

I have dedicated 18 years of my life studying medical stuff.... and the conclusion is, we dont cure anything, anybody... we make things less miserable, but once that something "breaks" or stop working, no science, no doctor, no medicine can repair at 100%.... Science has failed us when every single pill we take has (sometimes) horrible side effects and we have to put in a balance benefits vs side effects....

I guess my country, my family, myself dont have the culture to take a pill for everything... immediately.... so, I have to agree with doc this time... I dont need more meds in my life to solve (or try to solve without success) problems that come due to my soul problems, to feelings.... I am angry becase life in general has failed me.... I explode in anger because I feel God stole me my mom, I feel robbed.... Im tired of the people around me doing comments like "oh, so sorry, I dont know what I would do without my mom", THAT is exactly the problem, that I do not know what to do without my mom either and Im way younger than the people telling me that, so yeah, life is unfair or that is the feeling I have and there is no pill (or their side effects are not worth it) that can keep me with the thoughts and feelings Im having....

Sadly therapy has failed me too so far, but I will keep trying to stop suffering...

Ugh, I hate to post ultra long posts, but I have been rambling so much and just... spilled everything here I guess LMAO.

Take care you all !

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brokenfriend View Post
Blue You need to get another doctor as soon as possible. After talking to you over the years I find you to be a good person. You and the rest of us need to have good doctors.

That doctor failed you. You deserve better.

I'm sorry about your mother. I believe that she would want you to carry on. She'd want you to be strong. Be strong. We all care about you. BF
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Old 06-20-2019, 09:30 PM #120
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You are strong blue, never forget that.
((((((HUGS))))))
bizi
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Hattie the black and white one wrestling with hazel, calico. lost hattie to cancer.....
Happiness is a decision....

150mg of lamictal 2x a day
haldol 5mg 2x a day
1mg of cogentin 2x a day
klonipin , 1mg at night


I will not give up in this weight loss journey, nor this need to be AF. 3-19-13=156, 6-7-13=139, 8-19-13=149, 11-12-13=140, 6-28-14=157, 7-24-14=149, 9-24-14=144, 1-12-15=164, 2-28-15=149, 4-21-15=143, 6-26-15=138.5, 7-22-15=146, 8-24-15=151, 9-15-15=145, 11-1-15=137, 11-29-15=143, 1-4-16=152, 1-26-16=144, 2-24-16=150, 8-15-16=163, 1-4-17=169, 9-20-17=174, 11-17-17=185.6, 3-22-18=167.9, 8-31-18= 176.3, 3-6-19=190.8 5-30-20=176, 1-4-21=202, 10-4-21= 200.8,12-10-21=186, 3-26-22=180.3, 7-30-22=188, 10-15-22=180.9,
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