[Dmom3005]

Kay

I'm so proud of you for going 4 years. I know how hard it is.

Good job mam.

I am behind in lots of things today. So Bizi please be careful
with the weather.

Donna

[OhKay]

Bobby,
Smoking cigarettes and drinking are both STRONG addictions to be sure!!!

But drinking large amounts of alcohol can be very mind altering. Many people with mental illness drink to self-medicate, and over time, it becomes harder and harder to stop. It is insidious tho. I know that I would drink to feel happier/more euphoric, and more comfortable socially, but I would also drink at other times to drown my problems in alcohol. Drinking would trigger and fuel episodes, and the bad decisions I was making during hypo/mania only got worse...

Over time, I just totally lost control. If I kept drinking, I know I would not be here. Sometimes I do miss it, but that's rare. I drank lots of things, but mostly beer. Occasionally, I will drink an O'Douls.


Bizi,

Sometimes when you drink, you just get in the mood to get on a roll like that, and end up drinking in large quantities. Sometimes I couldn't pin down a trigger. It was probably the hypomania... or maybe you were shifting to mania? What do you think/how do you feel?

Do you have enough Zyprexa to take, or are you going to call your pdoc?

I hope you have a good day to day...

Love you (((HUGS)))

[bizi]

thank you kay will touch base later.
(((((HUGS)))))
love bizi

[bizi]

I need help.
Will call my psych doctor....
My sleep is horrible.I was awake at 3am this morning (could not get comfortable)
Melatonin is not working! Up at 6 am.
I have not slept well ever since my doctor discontinued my klonipin.
Have been running hypo for about a month.
It is getting really out of hand....my life is needing a shake down.
I need to start dieting again.
Eating freely and drinking like a fish sets me up for poor sleeping.
And I am starting to notice heart burn and indigestion,
took tums and zantac last night.
Need to stop this drinking!
Am going to an AA meeting tonight at 6pm.
Will touch base with my sponsor via telephone if she is not there tonight.
I am off to take a much needed shower.
bizi

[mymorgy]

can you get back on the klonopin if it really helps. It doesn't help me but last night I got three hours of sleep. I have tried different teas but they don't help.It is so awful to be sleep deprived.
I asked you before but you didn't answer. Why are you an atheist? How you you explain all the beauty in the world. How do you explain how the world is so complex? Do you think it was by accident? Have youalways been an atheist?
love
bobby

[mymorgy]

[QUOTE=OhKay;1277780]Bobby,
Smoking cigarettes and drinking are both STRONG addictions to be sure!!!

But drinking large amounts of alcohol can be very mind altering. Many people with mental illness drink to self-medicate, and over time, it becomes harder and harder to stop. It is insidious tho. I know that I would drink to feel happier/more euphoric, and more comfortable socially, but I would also drink at other times to drown my problems in alcohol. Drinking would trigger and fuel episodes, and the bad decisions I was making during hypo/mania only got worse...

Over time, I just totally lost control. If I kept drinking, I know I would not be here. Sometimes I do miss it, but that's rare. I drank lots of things, but mostly beer. Occasionally, I will drink an O'Douls.

My father was an alcoholic and self medicated with it. I am sure he had bipolar II because except when he was drinking he was always depressed. I asked him many years later why he drank and he said it made him happy. He also smoked a lot. I have my father's chemistry and drinking makes me happy and high. Occasionally I drink a bottle of wine or have scotch. His drinking destroyed my childhood because I was the caretaker. I hate being out of control so I would rather suffer. When I smoked (I started when I was 11) I felt I was in control except out of control with my smoking. As I wrote I didn't care if I wound up with lung cancer. It really helped my anxiety.
I am so glad you gave up drinking. I wish you could give up smoking! but unlike me I guess You can financially afford it. Unlike your rarely missing drinking I still miss smoking so much and know it would make me feel so much better.
Love
bobby

[OhKay]

Originally Posted by mymorgy

can you get back on the klonopin if it really helps. It doesn't help me but last night I got three hours of sleep. I have tried different teas but they don't help.It is so awful to be sleep deprived.
I asked you before but you didn't answer. Why are you an atheist? How you you explain all the beauty in the world. How do you explain how the world is so complex? Do you think it was by accident? Have youalways been an atheist?
love
bobby

I do not think that Bizi is going to answer that question, Bobby.
It is a complex and personal belief that a lot of people do not feel is open to discussion.

I do understand your curiosity tho.

[mymorgy]

I wasn't trying to convert her. I think I would have killed myself if I didn't believe in God. It was curiosity because I just don't know she manages.

[OhKay]

Originally Posted by mymorgy

I wasn't trying to convert her. I think I would have killed myself if I didn't believe in God. It was curiosity because I just don't know she manages.

Please don't say things like that. I don't believe in or practice any organized religion, and you know my history.

I know you were not trying to convert her

[OhKay]

Bizi,

I'm so glad that you are going to reach out to your pdoc (((HUGS)))

You are just not yourself right now. The hypomania is making it harder to make good choices and control some of your behavior

I think once you can break this episode, you can start getting a handle on some of the things that are important to you like your drinking and your dieting (((HUGS)))

I hope you can catch up on some sleep tonight