We are listening.

And I agree with Kay. Do things for yourself today.
And be there for your kitty. Listen to your tape and do some
knitting.

Donna

Good morning Donna *smiles*

Thank you for responding to my threads, it helps alot for support right now.

Just gave my kitty his morning meds, so he is knocked out for several hours. We played alot yesterday. With all the drama/trauma over the past month, I have not really been there for him.

Knitting is on my recliner waiting for me.

Chat with you later ((( appreciation hugs )))

Blue

hi blue,
do you have support in real life?
Are you married? have children to help be of support?
This all so so awful and you were stuck in a hard spot for some time.
Do you have a therapist to help with with your own mental health issues? can you call to see them soon if you have one?
thinking of you today.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

Hi bizi ~ You know you have the same first name as the famous US Olympic/Equestrian Team horseback rider. She had a long history of successful riding. She won us alot of metals. I used to enjoy watching her ride.

You are correct, in that I am making strides to get off the cycle of drama/trauma and abuse. Knitting today and watching my Westerns (anything horses and I'm all good).

I have no remaining family - estrange from my two living sisters and that is that.

Most of my closest friends have passed away (due to age), so I've had to start all over again and the selection pool is very poor where i live.

I was supposed to seek out a new therapist this week (per my new psych doc's request), but it's way too difficult for me now, too many upsetting things. Will try again next week.

I am no longer married and have no children (could never carry to full term), so I love my animals - they become my kids (they always give unconditional love).

Spoke with the sick tenants best friend (C) who is a fiber artist and she is encouraging me to go to the Senior Center and start back with this. So, will consider it. I do want to start back with machine quilting.

If I can get to horses and be in a barn, my world would be alot different.

How are you and how is your weather coming along?

Blue

Hope you can figure out how to get to the senior center.

And look into the horses and barn. Maybe there is one that
would like to have a volunteer. And would help figure out
how to get you there.

Donna

Stop taking their phone calls.

I have stopped receiving their phone calls, inappropriate reaction. Slept all afternoon, totally drained from the experience.

They are very concerned the police will come back to check on her and they asked me to call the police and warn them away, which I felt was unreasonable and which I didn't.. They warned me that should the police return, it could cause her to become more unstable and she was threatened by their presence, so it would be my fault if anything happened to her. I was shocked by this comment and I said nothing. Anything further said, would cause more ulglyness coming down on me. I thought to myself that I welcomed the police when they came to help me, but everyone is different.

Then I was told they are taking her out to her favorite restaurant and stopping back on the way home to pick up donuts. I asked if they could pick up a few for me, they didn't. It is rapidly apparent they are holding a grudge (C and M).

Hoping tomorrow I will be yesterday's news.

I was not shown any genuine appreciation for what I did for her. It's not that I expected anything at all, just a simple thank you acknowledging my efforts. Also, never got a thank you for taking care of their cats for two weeks. So, will tell them I am no longer offering this service. When I added up the normal cost to go to the home 2X a day to attend to their cats, I could have received about $200.00. If I decide to do this again, in the future, I will be charging $14.00 a day for two visits. Not letting anyone take advantage of me again.

So, in defense of what is happening, I ordered out from my favorite restaurant to have a good meal and desert in celebration for making it thru the last 48 hours and honoring myself. I don't think I am such a bad person, just someone that may care too much.

Blue

Thank you Donna *smiles*. There is an equestrian park not to far from here. Looking up the horse shows today. Once I am there, I can go stand in the barn.

Blue