My friend told me that my order of CBD just came in and I will have it by noon monday! after I get my blood draw for my tegretol level.
I am so hoping it will work like klonipin! Fingers crossed!!!!!!!


I am a bit better tonight.
took down the christmas decorations! finally. Trees are still up though, just undecorated them.

Hubby will put them up in the attic above the car port. His back is bothering him so that may be a few days of sitting in the middle of the room in boxes.
plus 2 loads of laundry...
a tiny bit of paper work for work so it was a productive day.
Took some flowers and a card to a friend who lost her dog, she put him down....he was in kidney failure from diabetes. 13 years old been sickly for years....glad that she has another dog to love too though Mocha.
So I am really getting ready for bed soon...need to eat some peanut butter. Maybe I will get a jar to keep in my bathroom cupboard? Since I am having it nightly now, seems to work great! no more heart burn from the tegretol!!!!
Thanks for reading bobby! love you
bizi

sweet about the doggie.. hope the CBD works. that is so great about the peanut butter! My stomach has been killing me.
Love
bobby

the CBD was ok I think
I slept thru the night and got up after 15 minutes after shutting the alarm off.
Jeff is sick. cold fever he went to lay down around 8pm
he was resting when I got home.


I have been so hot....and sweaty!
my face is wet!
I feel like I have had an on going of nite sweats today. awful
I saw 4 but did not see my last client, rescheduled for the following wednesday.

She sliced her big toe and it is all bandaged up.

I have to get up early tomorrow and have my wind shield replaced from a nasty rock/chip.
they are coming anywhere from 8-10am and the car has to sit for 2 hours I think.
so will resschedule my 10am appointment.
I need to take a shower, tomorrow morning is the day.
My hair looks awful....having it longer I should probably wash it more often....
It is driving me crazy on my neck!
Will try to get to bed earlier tonight....try...geesh!
I baked some salmon and had left over green beans with bacon and almonds
They were delicious!
I need to speak to the manager at sandras.

We bought 3 1/2 pounds of talapia
2 weeks ago. Friday and packaged it up on satuday for

the freezer and it smelled fishy and was tacky!


Jeff bought me a huge butter finger bar! I ate half tonight
it was so good! He knows it is my favorite!
Well I had better sign off.
thanks for reading!
bizi

what is the temperature?
love
bobby

it is 55 right now and high today of 64...but rainy.
bizi

hi bobby,
Just talked to dr. dusty our vet. and we both think it is time to put her down. I called to get support and he was very supportive. I told him that Jeff was not willing to put her down until she was listless.
sigh
Is it wrong for me to just wish should would die?


I am still hypo....yesterday, I discontinued the prevagen just in case it could be activating....my tegretol level is good,
found out yesterday they called With the results and I told her I stopped it and it contributed to the hypomaina. (at least I think so).

Robin canceled my therapy session with her. Have yet to reschedule.
The guy is here putting in my new windshield., don't know how long it will have to sit..
I need to get into the shower after he leaves, that is of course.


If the tegretol doesn't even out my hypomania soon then I will have to go back on lithium...unless you can think of another medication for me to try.
Maybe the geodon is not working anymore?
I heard it was hard to get off of....vraylar is expensive but I think there is a drug card.

sigh
love bizi who is getting into the shower!

when two of my cats were very sick I prayed for them to die naturally. don't feel guilty. have you tried risperdal? That helped me and I don't know why the doctor took me off it it.
love
bobby

Lots of stress in my family.
I am hypomanic
hubby, Jeff is sick temp 100.4 sneezing, cold symptoms
bil-unemployed so is able to help with MIL....
mil -sick in hospital, may need stomach surgery, very scary!
Father-sinus infection gettting better but now ....
mother now sick 101 fever, shaking for some reason
they are supposed to fly to florida on saturday.
Sisters mil has colon cancer and and now the flu....poor thing.
sister is a nurse and works at a pediatric office.
she said tonight.../
have you ever read the stephen king book "the stand"
about the plague....the corona virus is like this....
very scary times.
bizi

i am so sorry you are bombarded with so much illness.
love
bobby

Dr. Orazio,


I just got off the phone with Robin, my therapist.
She encouraged me to write to you.
Since I am not sure if you are in the office on friday mornings...you may not see this until monday morning.
Am seeing Robin monday afternoon at 2 pm. I think I see you March 3rd.

Two weeks ago, I had made an appointment to see her on wednesday but she canceled and could not see me

today so we texted this evening and she helped me feel better.


This has been a frustrating year for me....Wasn't it over a year ago that we tried the abilify and that didn't help.

Back to lamictal and geodon at max doses.
anyway...I really believe I have been unstable for quite some time.
Even the change to lithium(you had suggested vraylar too) I became hypomanic at christmas time in indiana(on lithium)

I was afraid of the geodon with drawl so instead stayed with the geodon.
But now, I do believe the geodon is not working.
I have not had this amount of hypomania since BEFORE I met you.
Took the increased dose of tegretol after dinner tonight and have already stopped the prevagen in case it was activating.


My Hypomania symptoms:
Having problems with time management.(home and work)

spending too much time with clients doing my job....it is taking me longer. Seems so hard to do now.

don't trust my instincts.
questioning my skills

poor boundary issues
being late for everything
on the computer, up too late, after midnight

over sleeping
driving is an issue, very distractable
last week a bit paranoid looking for cop cars
this week trying to focus to not get into a car accident
impatient with other people

hard focusing on routine, takes twice as long to do my night time routine,

getting home late and eating out a lot!
Skipping personal hygiene steps( brushing teeth, washing face, applying night time creams)

Bounced a check because I avoided making a deposit(I never bounce checks!)


Today, I was so angry with you when you did not want to change my anti-psychotic,
like you did not believe me. I don't want to get manic! or worse psychotic!!



I started using CBD at night to help improve my sleep....2 nights and I think I am sleeping better.


bizi