I am a basket of nerves. she had a rabies and distemper shot. i called back the place and they said her vaccinations were okay and i want to see if robert can take her that morning. i didn't mention the corona vaccine and she didn't either. i tried a few places that come to the house. one wanted 265.
love
bobby

i just two more m of klonopin. pudge threw up twice today. i freaked out. i wondered if it was because of the nonprescription. she stopped eating the prescription food. my stomach hurts so much. i love pudge so much. i can't take stress. my dental cleaning is at 4. i am feeling a bit nauseated too.

Hopefully Robert will be able to take her

Donna

i am trying to have her groomed at home which will cost more.
My volunteer called me again tonight. the time just sped by. he is so brilliant and well rounded and has a great sense of humor He is an animal lover and even had an aby when he was growing up.
He sent me an article he wrote that i requested. so smooth and fascinating.
Love
bobby

i am having such a hard time for getting pudge groomed. Once again my nerves are shot. i hate with such a passion being bipolar. it is so destructive.
i have no tolerance for stress. i hate being physically handicapped and being so dependent on others. the klonopin is not working.

I am sorry you are so unwell.
long haired kitties have to be brushed everyday. That is why we never got a long hair cat because we would not have time to brush them.
so you have looked into getting her groomed at your apartment. We have mobile vets who drive up in there van and bring your pet into the van and then give them their vaccinations or what ever.
I am sorry that you don't think the klonipin is working for you any more.
love

bizi

when i am really upset the klonopin doesn't work. most of the time it helps.
only recently has Pudge started to get some mats. she was last groomed in January. you don't have to brush them everyday unless they have cottony hair.I don't know how much you pet your cats but I pet mine a lot. I think they need a lot of attention to be really happy.
My Snowball had cottony hair. yuki had long hair and never matted. she was such a gorgeous little persian.
Finally somebody is coming over on monday to groom Pudge.
i sighed up for a life after death course that should start soon. I adore my Wednesday class with a lot of participation. Today we talked about science and God. Last week we talked about good and evil. somebody said that maybe God created evil as a challenge for us to be good. I loved it. The participants are really bright.
My allergies finally have gone away after the vaccination and my spelling is coming back too. my back still really hurts after the last fall and when I walk it really hurts. time should heal as in the past falls.
love
bobby who wishes she could sleep.

i get verses every day from the bible. Today it was from proverbs


Anxiety in a man's heart weighs him down,
but a good word makes him glad.

i have been thinking all morning if I should try to go alone in a cab of course when I have to go some where. I am sure the cab driver would help me with the walker, If I fell I am sure somebody would help me.
I can't stand being so dependent. I don't know what to do, I need to go to get my haircut. It just looks so awful..I am really tempted to try to go in two weeks alone.
I do feel safer now having my therapist who was off this week and now my new social worker intern. I feel they are safe havens. I do really enjoy my religious courses. Now I don't feel as bad once I read that one in five bipolars suffer from panic attacks.I just have to suffer through them.

Bobby

Are you still going out in your hall way daily and walking up and down it?
Reason I ask is it will help you make it easier to walk to the haircut place.
If you try to go by yourself. And if when Marci is there you would have
her go a little further with you each day, to help you walk more it
would really help you too.

Also if things come to you from downstairs. You could ask the doorman
if you come down. If you are shaky if he would help make sure you get
back upstairs. Tell him you really need to keep walking so your legs
are stronger and arms. Not all the time, say just once a day.

Donna

since my last fall my balance and walking have gotten much worse besides now having my back ache. My neck and side finally stopped hurting.They are doing construction on my floor so have laid down something over the carpet so i can't walk much with walker. IT HURTS WHEN I WALK. I have also stumbled a few times when i now walk in my apartment over nothing. I can only carry light things. i don't have strength.. I am so very afraid that I am going to fall again until I Heal more.
It is so f@#KING SCAREY.
I guess i haven't made it clear enough. i live on the 18th floor and tip a porter to bring up stuff that is delivered. I hardly ever go downstairs now.
when i just went to the dentist with marci she helped so many times from falling with the walker because the side walks are uneven. It really sh@ts.
Now when i walk in my apartment i always reach for the next thing to hold so i won't fall done.

I am very lucky. So far I haven't broken anything. I haven't had any diseases.
I have had beautiful and affectionate pets. I love listening to music and I love reading. I helped a lot of children when I was a psychologist. Now I also love my religious lectures. I traveled a lot when I was younger.