[bizi]

thanks bobby,
I was restless for a bit then got to sleep. up at 10am. ( so about8 hours of sleep)

on to my first of coffee.
happy halloween!
bizi

[mymorgy]

i guess we both have very difficult struggles which we can't overcome. i wonder if you have severe underlying depression and are suffering. so much and mask it with enjoying excess drinking so much. when you wrote how good it was you made me feel so sad. we love you. It sounds as if jeff is blind and an enabler and doesn't seem to care about your health. We do .I am so angry at Jeff. have you ever thought of going to rehab??. alcohol for you is poison no matter how good it tastes and makes you feel. You can't do it by yourself and must be torturing yourself. How much are you suffering? Finally when my father stopped drinking i asked why did he drink. He simply said it made him feel good. I guess he didn't care how he destroyed my childhood and only cared about himself.He never got into an accident with his frequent drunk driving. His tolerance was low so he got drunk fast. It didn't affect his health. I am so worried of your long term health.
Love you and so worried.
bobby

I hated to write this but i love you.

[Dmom3005]

Keep working on the non alcoholic beers and keep going to the gym.
I honestly don't think its going to be a one day I stop type thing for
you. But I also think if you can limit it to one day like that maybe
it will work.

Donna

[mymorgy]

Research has found a strong connection between bipolar disorder and alcoholism. Estimates show that up to 45% of individuals with bipolar disorder also engage in alcohol abuse.[i] Even on its own, bipolar can be a difficult diagnosis to handle. And when substance abuse of any kind is added to the list of problems, treatment and recovery become even more complicated.

Alcohol is known to intensify bipolar disorder due to its sedating effects. It acts similarly to some medications, risking feelings of depression with each swig of alcohol. Alcohol also greatly increases the severity of mania, which many who suffer from bipolar find extremely pleasurable.

[bizi]

I know that and wanted to drink anyway. I don't like to be alone.
I have been procrastinating doing paperwork for my business.
Those are my reasons for drinking last night. I really need to make getting the charts made up.
love you bobby, I know you care.
bizi

[mymorgy]

that is a lot of kids and candy. i bet they loved the decorations. Sorry about the fog machine. How many years have you and Jeff been doing this.
The food you have been eating sounds so delicious. Is it any easier this time to be AF? I hope so. How much coffee do you usually drink?
love
bobby

[bizi]

we have been haunting the house since we moved in here 2002.
jeff is really tired and it seems harder to take things down now. He is making some progress. We went to texas road house for dinner tonight.
I smelled the rolls but did not eat them. I ordered the road kill which is ground steak bunless burger with smothered onions mushrooms and jack cheese with added bacon. and a house salad with out croutons, ranch dressing.
had a side of brocolli and carrots which I only ate half the carrots they have a lot of natural sugar so it is a higher carbohydrate. no snacking after dinner and drank water at dinner jeff did also. Jeff had a 14 ounce ribeye steak green beans and a salad with blue cheese dressing. our bill was $36 before tip.

total bill with an 8$ tip was $44. not bad for a steak dinner.
bizi