The good news is that I am finally trying to give up swearing. I love to swear and it is a great release for me. I guess I will start using rats. I was so scared to go in the hall again and got very angry at myself. When I run into her I will just say don't ever talk to me again. I don't want to be an old mentally ill frightened person. I have told three of the workers here and the management for documentation about what she has done..

i feel so awful. I just realized I missed my friend's birthday. I just sent her an apology and asked for her forgiveness.. I am losing it.

I missed my good friends son's funeral....
heavy sigh
bizi

i have really been binge eating. it is awful.

Bobby,

When you have a thought that a drunk shouldn't have kids.

Remember something for me. I would never have gotten to know
you. And never, gotten to learn so much great information from
you. I really enjoy listening to your great information, and also love
to hear about your kitties. And I personally believe its a blessing
that you were born into this world.

Personally I love you.

Also just so you know. I can't get my private messages to answer people.

So this is the answer. I don't take baths right now. I can't get up out of the tub.

I only take a shower if someone is in the house with me. And I don't have a bar
yet, because I have had a hard time getting my husband to understand why its necessary. But he is redoing lots of our house this next year And I plan on
getting one then.

Donna :grouphug::hug:

bobby, I am sorry that you are binge eating.We have a container of lindt chocolate dark, truffles. they are heavenly. We have one almost every night. It is lush and just enough yummyness that we can just have one. get your self some good veggies, eat them raw without any thing on them:celery, tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, zuchini, and summer squash. what about some almonds?Do you like avocados?They are so creamy and delicious.
They have good fat in them. they are also full of fiber. We used to eat them every night. now I don't why we stopped eating them.you have to be careful not to let them go bad, ask for ripe ones and they should be soft to the touch but not too soft. Putting them into the refrigerator to stop the ripening of them.
just some suggestions of good foods to binge on.
love

bizi

donna,
that was so sweet. maybe you are the only one. My family was so cruel..
First get your husband to get a rail thing for you bathtub,. it is cheap and fast to install,. there is no excuse whatsoever.
medication doesn't seem to work for me so i have just suffered so much through my life. i can't kill myself. i am stuck with the pain and doing stupid and self destructive stuff.
Love,
bobby

bizi
so glad about your kitty. prayers to your mother.
my stomach usually always hurts and i think raw vegetables are bad for ibs.. seems like everything is bad for ibs.
took two different laxatives last night and so far nothing.
SO RELIEVED ABOUT THE SENATE. I GUESS THERE IS SANITY.
love,
bobby.

i am also giving up buying more clothes and shoes. i get a high but it doesn't last.

finally beginning to feel close to God again.