It seems like everything is coming at me in all directions now. With worrying about Doug dying and being upset about how much of a ride Doug's roommate is taking him for is wearing me down. It really would bother me to see Doug's roommate living it up while Doug and I could not afford to because we were being responsile with our money. I had a strong feeling that Doug's roommate was stealing Doug blind but of course Doug would always blame everyone else. After all, the boy is like a real son to Doug. Well, today Doug found out that his roommate has spent almost half of the expenses without giving it to Doug. The boy just got paid Friday and went from over $600 to around $150 in his checking and did not pay his share of the bills with that. This is not even a week ago and the boy ****** the money away to party I'm sure as he stays up all night to party and sleeps all day. When Doug found out from the bank how much Carl had left he was really hurt and upset. A single tear came down his cheek. That is what really bothers me the most is what this if making Doug feel like.

Then the stuff in my own life I'm dealing with like Goodwill jerking me around. Thank you for your support in my post btw. I really am getting discouraged with all the injustices and bad people in this world. I feel like I'm coming out from under the smokesreen all over again and having to learn to deal with my emotions again. I wonder when I will ever feel in control. I mean really in control of my emotions. And why does anything in life have to be such a hassel to achieve? It seems to get justice, respect, or any common courtesy from others there has to be such a effort on ones part.

Perhaps tomorrow will be a better day.