Dear BArbara,
This must be shocking to have found this out.
Had he been ill or was it a heart attack...do you know?

Be kind to yourself...you need time to heal from this and yes you slhould be entitled to social security i think.
I am sorry that you are so depressed.
this is a hard time of the year for so many.
know that you are not alone....
bizi

Dear Befuddled,
I'm sorry that he is gone.

Give yourself a chance to grieve.

Mari

Thank you all. It is hurting me so bad now that I cannot sleep. I come across a letter my husband had written to me when he was still trying to get me back and it was heart wrenching. It is ashame that my husband had to be like he was. I understand why he was, his parents were controlling and abusive. I will try to go to Sunday School if I'm still up for early service.

befuddled2

Barb

You can always go to the place he is buried or cremated and say something.

I'm a firm believer that those that have passed can still here you.

I also think that you are one strong lady and will work your way through
this.

Donna

(((((((((((((((((((((((BF))))))))))))))))))))))

Thinking of you. I agree about the SS.

I understand about an ex abuser.

I can only imagine what you are going through right now.

You are a very strong person, you will get through this.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Nikko:hug:

My dear friend.

I have been thinking very long and very hard about what I want to tell you.

It all boils down to this.

Bless you, my dear. Bless your tender and loving heart. Bless your joyous and peaceful soul. Thank you for being you. And thank you for all of the love you give this world.

I am sorry you hurt so bad.

Thank you Donna and Nikko,

I do not qualify for any of my husband's SS.

A trillion tears later and I'm not sure how but I know I'll make it through this. My faith will pull me through for sure.

My husband was told he had cancer 3 weeks before his death so it was kind of sudden. He declined chemo but I'm not sure it would have helped by time he found out anyway. I've been told conflicting stories about where he died. Some said he moved to his home town and another said he died in the home we shared together. I called Social Services and requested an application be sent to me for aid. I have a little saved up to carry me through until I get financial assistance I'm sure.

befuddled2

Barb

I'm so glad you got more information. And with the things you have written
I can totally understand know how no one knew what to tell you.

Other than someone could have let you know before he was gone so you could have said good bye. But then it might be that he didn't know you wanted to do so.

And they might have been honoring his wish for no one to know also.

Sending you some hugs. And we will be here for you.

Donna

Mrs. Bear, I did not see your post until now. I think we were typing at the same time. Thank you for your kind words.

Thank you Donna.

I so exhausted but scared to go to bed or the tears will come. I tried to post some pictures on his online guestbook but the page was all messed up.

befuddled2

Rest when you can Barbara and cry when you feel like it....
((((HUGS))))
bizi