Coping with the holidays

Mari · 10-29-2006, 07:23 PM

9 Ways to Beat the Bah Humbugs by Meredith Whitten
http://psychcentral.com/library/holiday_humbugs.htm

Quote:

Not everybody delights in all the festivities and joy of the holiday season. People from all walks of life and in all sorts of situations feel depressed, sad or out of it during the holidays. If you have the holiday blues, the following tips may help lift your spirits...........

Start new traditions -- "Create for yourself what you didn't have in the past," Wish said.
Knowing what caused you to be blue in the past can help you create happier memories in the future by beginning new traditions, Bentley says.

As families change and grow, traditions may need to change as well, Cobb says. With families reuniting during the holidays, parents' and grown children's expectations may not match, which may lead to a dip in mood. Allow yourself some time away from your family and set realistic expectations, Cobb emphasizes.

Remember that the holiday blues are usually temporary.

The Holiday Train Wreck:
Helpful Hints for Navigating the Holidays Successfully by John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

http://psychcentral.com/archives/n121998.htm

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.......Obviously if you are suffering from a mental disorder which is worsened by the stress or additional emotions brought about by the holidays, you should look into increasing your coping skills.

This can be done on your own, or you can ask your therapist to talk more about these skills and find ones that work best for you. The key here is to let your therapist know what you need to work on at this time of the year, and then proceed to work on it.

Mari · 10-29-2006, 07:26 PM

Coping with holiday grief
http://www.westsidenews.net/OldSite/...es/coping.html

Quote:

Mayo Clinic suggests these ways to deal with and understand the pain of loss that holidays can trigger in you or your loved ones:

1. Plan to incorporate the past and present in holiday events. Have patience with yourself. Balance people and privacy.

2. Give a memorial to the deceased. Attend a candle service, display a special ornament, make a memory book or sing a favorite song.

3. Instead of avoiding grief by avoiding activities, plan one or two significant things to try, but remember to give yourself an out.

4. The bereaved need to be up-front. For example, say, "Christmas is a little empty this year without John." Use the name of the deceased to open the door for others to say they really miss him too.

5. Avoid clichés such as "It must be wonderful to spend Christmas in heaven," which can be misinterpreted by those who are grieving.

6. Don't completely isolate yourself, but do take time to reflect on your own.

7. Share your feelings with someone close, preferably a good listener.

8. Helping the bereaved with errands can lessen the stress.

9. Grief doesn't necessarily lessen after one year. Remember for some the second time through the holidays is even more difficult than the first.

Remember that no matter what, holidays, like other days, will pass.

Nikko · 10-30-2006, 09:08 AM

The Holidays are going to be extremely depressing for me. I already can feel it when I walk into a store and see all the decorations.

It is only myself and my mom. No money for gifts. All friends back East.

I don't know how I am going to handle it. This isn't the first time I have felt like this.

I can't even talk about it.

Nikko

Junie · 10-30-2006, 09:18 AM

I know just how everyone feels.....I always feel so happy this time of year but this year I just want to pass by the holiday's and not even put up a tree! I also always make sure I have plenty of money to spend on Everyone but this year I only plan to buy for the people that have been a part of my life......the sick life....and I don't feel guilty about not buying for my oldest son, mom, and sisters since they have ignored me all year! Instead of having the big family party I always have at my house I will just have those closest to me over.
I really miss having small children here

BJ · 10-30-2006, 08:56 PM

Thanks for posting these tips. I don't know how I'll handle this holiday season. It's the first one without my mom. Last year my dad was gone but I had mom and now she's gone too.

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